


The Sparrow

by Mistress_Wolf



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Anxiety, Coping, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Hope, Injury Recovery, Love Triangles, Multi, Mutual Pining, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Smut, have courage be kind, its chaos be kind
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2021-03-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:33:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 17
Words: 71,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27949118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mistress_Wolf/pseuds/Mistress_Wolf
Summary: Edwardian Era Dragon Age AU. I wanted something between the stablished timeline and modern AU with a slight steampunk feel. I wanted to explore 'What If' scenarios and this was the result. What if Solas didn't wake when he was supposed to? What if he slept an extra millennia? What if the veil got stronger? What if Cullen new Lavellan since childhood? What if Morrigan's mother Flemeth adopted Izzie after a tragedy? Softer adoptive sister Morrigan?Cullen, Izzie, Solas romance.
Relationships: Female Lavellan/Cullen Rutherford, Lavellan/Solas (Dragon Age)
Comments: 74
Kudos: 10





	1. The Sparrow

Chapter 1

  
The Sparrow

  
 _Wake up..._  
She knows she needs to... But does she really have to though? She can tell that as soon as she gets out of bed it'll hit her how cold it is. She needs to ask her sister to fix the window in her room. There's a latch that won't latch properly. Every time the wind blows too hard a draft comes in.   
Her sister is gone on business for the rest of the week. Another business deal or negotiation for more use of the lyrium mines she controls. Well not controls... More or less manages. The dwarves own the mines, Morrigan is just a liason. Morrigan helps negotiate the sale, shipment and use of the lyrium between the dwarves and the King’s army. _Blegh.._.She thinks… _Politics..._

  
She opens her eyes and sits up slowly like every morning raising her left arm up to stretch before her right like clockwork. She lets her left arm fall slowly as her neck is more sore this morning than the night before. She winces at the sharp pain, then rolls over and fumbles to her nightstand to grab her tin of cooling mint salve she made. Izzie sits up and twists her wavy dark brown hair out of the way of her neck. Slowly and carefully with her right hand she lifts the lid and takes some salve between her fingertips and starts applying from her neck muscles down to her shoulder, hitting the bundle of nerves at the top. After a minute the salve she realizes is starting to warm up and slide easier. " _So impatient._ " She can hear her sister’s words in her head without her being there and grins a little at the thought.   
She carefully puts the lid back on her tin and reaches for a different salve on her nightstand. This one smells of lavender and honey. A little more sticky and sweet but good for dry skin and itchyness brought on from old scars. She takes a small amount so she won't waste it and applies in small circles around the stub of her left arm, tracing the lines of scars that travel just a little up her shoulder. 

  
"Tap tap tap!"

  
The sound at her bedroom door gives her a small jump as the door is opened by Faline. The friendly, middle aged elf enters with a mug of coffee, steam coming off the top. Messy brown curls dangle from her bun on top of her head to frame her face. She's already dressed for today and looks like she's been up a while. She wears a casual form fitting,long sleeve, green dress with a brown knitted scarf around her neck. Morrigan's mother hired her 4 years ago to help keep the house clean and running smoothly. That's the reasoning Flemeth gave back then anyways... Izzie knows it had more to do with her moving in. Izzie's "adoptive mother" Flemeth must have known that when she brought Izzie to her house to live with her that she would need help adjusting to life after the tragedy that took her family and her arm.

"Coffee is done dear. I think it's strong enough for you this morning" Faline says as she walks toward Izzie.  
Izzie smiles and starts to shuffle to the edge of the bed to get up, but Faline meets her at the edge of the bed and sits with her, handing her the porcelain mug.

" I was about to get up I swear." Izzie inhales into her coffee cup and breathes in the rich aroma.

"Your sister said to make sure you get out of bed at a reasonable hour everyday while she was gone. Even if it's just for coffee". Faline gives her a wink as she continues. "Also, a letter came for you this morning. It's downstairs on the kitchen table so you'll have to get up and go get it if you want to see who it's from."

Izzie gives her an raised eyebrow and small smile as she holds her mug close. "Well now I'm curious. You aren't going to tell me who the letter is from?"

"Nope!" she grins and gets up abruptly. "I'm going to ask our courier to fetch some things from the market for dinner and get started on laundry. " She starts walking back towards the bedroom door when she turns and continues "Oh! While I've got him I’ll see if there is anyone who needs your services today. I believe Morrigan knows of someone who needs something made. "Sam" I think was his name."

"Yes," Izzie replies "Uhhh, that's right, Morrigan said he is looking for a tincture or something I can make for headaches but I need more Elfroot. I've got plenty of lavender and peppermint oil.”

Faline replies "I'll have the courier fetch some for you." She looks over to Izzie’s desk by the window and sees her Elfroot plants have been thoroughly harvested. Nothing more to be gained from. "Maybe I'll see if we have extra pots in the basement so you can plant some more. You run out so quickly."

"Thank you Faline" 

"You're welcome da'len" Faline reaches the bedroom door and closes it behind her.  
Alone again with her thoughts Izzie decides to get up, coffee in hand and walks around her bed to her armoire. Women are supposed to wear dresses but Izzie rarely goes outside anyways. If she does, she hides under a big jacket, looser pants and an oversized hat to cover her Elven ears. Elves are rarely treated well in Val Royeaux. Mostly she feels like Elves and their existence is simply tolerated...But she knows better.

"Don't go down dark alleys at night by yourself" She remembers Morrigan's mother Flemeth telling her.   
"Always take another human with you if you go to the market...Cover your ears...Hold your head up when someone addresses you. Speak simply and never give too much information about yourself... Elves that congregate become a bigger target...And whatever you do, DON'T use your magic in public..."

That part always stung. _"Don't use your magic."_  
The thing her mother told her made her special. The thing that got her whole family killed she thinks. How dare one raise an Elven family in the heart of Orlais and run an apothecary out of their house. No one else in the family even had magic to begin with. It's not like her magic was a big deal anyway. She could heal cuts and scrapes and ease muscle pain. Unfortunately the talk of the town was that her father Mordin was hiding a "dangerous" magic user. Izzie never knew how word got out in the first place. Her father was a retired archeologist turned chemist/aspiring inventor and her mother Milah knew herbs. Together they sold/gave away potions and tonics to anyone in the city that needed medicines they couldn't otherwise afford. Taxes were so high at the time most lower class citizens couldn't afford treatment or a real hospital visit.

Izzie got dressed in a loose cream blouse she tucked into brown trousers. Her left sleeve already tied off at the end of her arm. She took a looped cord from her nightstand and wrapped her hair loosely at the nape of her neck. Standing in front of her mirror next to her desk she adjusted her hair to have loose strands frame her face. She likes her hair like this she thinks-reminds her of her mother. She stands there a moment and realizes this shirt is a bit see through. It's not super revealing. In fact no one else may even notice... But Izzie does. She can see her scars that travel on her left side under her arm through the shirt. Her imperfect skin she would rather not focus on. _That's why I own vests_ , she thinks to herself and grabs the one she tossed on the ground the night before. Izzie turns to her desk to look at her beakers and vials, her jars of herbs and measuring cups, and her tiny bottles of oils. She's got what she needs she thinks but picks up her notebook on the desk to see what she needs to make today. 

-Anti nausea tincture for Athena the soon to be mother (human, haven't met her, sis says she's nice though) 

-Cooling salve for muscle aches for Harritt (human, grumpy but cordial)

-Anti inflammatory tincture for Flissa (human bartender down the street. Havent met her.) 

-Anti inflammatory tincture and salve for headaches for Sam...( no additional information)

Izzie pauses and thinks to herself. _I can send these medicines with the courier when he comes back . Need to ask Faline about this "Sam". Will he come get his medicine or can I find out more so I can send it with the Courier later?_ She'd rather strangers not come to the door unless she knows them or Morrigan approves of them coming to the house. Not everyone in town knows of Morrigan's adopted Elven sister. If anything people in the city might just know that a "Lady Isolde'' lives here. 

  
Izzie starts work on her tinctures and salves. About an hour into working she finds herself squinting to see how many drops of oils she's putting into a glass vial. _Ahh,_ she thinks to herself, Maybe if I let more light in. She sets down her lavender oil and opens up the drapes in front of her desk to let light in from the tall windows that overlook the street below. Her bedroom is on the second floor of the house. Not a crazy beautiful view but she has rooftop access that she sneaks up to occasionally to feel like she "went outside".

  
As she looks out the window she gets on her toes and bends slightly over her desk to look down at the street. Not a busy day. No kids playing in the street. Too cold out anyways. There's frost covering the grass that almost looks like snow outside. She looks out and above the smaller buildings and sees a trail of white clouds a little ways out. Train coming into the station. I wonder if he's on leave soon? He hasn't sent her a letter in a while. _Oh that's right! The letter!_

  
She's running low on coffee anyways so she grabs her mug and with more pep in her step makes her way down the hallway passing Faline's room and the other guest bedroom. Down the stairs she bounds but starts slowing down as she hears the front door open and Faline answers it. Izzie gets to the bottom of the steps but ducks slightly behind a pillar to eavesdrop. Faline opens the door. 

"Ah there you are!" Exclaims Faline. Izzie peers around the pillar to peek at the visitor.  


 _Oh it's Cole!_ The courier. Izzie thinks and sighs to herself.   
"Thank you Cole." Faline says as Cole hands her a basket of groceries from the shops. 

Cole...The lanky, quiet, young, pale human who observes more than he lets on. On occasion after he's gone and gotten them groceries or delivers mail he returns with a small gift. A sprig of Elfroot or Baby's Breath for Izzie, a new barrette for Faline for her hair. Only ever given one gift for Morrigan though. She's rarely home anyways, but Izzie will never forget the quiet smiles they exchanged and the "thank you" nod Morrigan gave Cole when he brought her a small brass mirror. The ear to ear smile Cole had that said "I did good". 

Seeing it was someone they trusted, Izzie came out from behind the pillar and met Cole and Faline at the door. Teeth slightly chattering from the cold, Cole handed another basket he was carrying to Izzie.   
"Thank you Cole" Izzie said with a smile.

"Did you want to come in a moment from the cold? You look like you're freezing."

Cole looked up a bit, eyes peering under his large floppy hat "Do you have cocoa today?"

"Of course we do Cole," Faline smiles and puts her hand on his shoulder to guide him in from the cold and to the kitchen. A step ahead of them Izzie starts making Cole his cocoa. As she makes him a drink she remembers there was a letter for her. Faline sits Cole down at the kitchen table and Izzie hands him his mug. 

"Thank you" Cole smiles and relaxes into the chair. Faline busies herself putting things away as Izzie can't stand it anymore and grabs the letter in the middle of the table.

To be delivered to Lady Isolde at Lady Morrigan's residence  
Izzie tore open the envelope. After a moment, a sigh of relief escaped her and her grin got bigger...

_Izzie,_   
_I hope this letter gets to you in a timely manner. By the time you receive this I think I'll be a week out. I've missed you terribly and look forward to the much needed leave. I can't wait to catch up. Not sure how much time I'll have to spend on leave before I'm put on a new assignment. Looking forward to telling you about it though. Oh before I forget...There's a man I'll be sending your way for medicine. "Sam" You'll like him. He's traveling with me. I already sent word to Morrigan via telegram that he will come by at some point. Needs something for his headaches. See you soon Izzie..._   
_-Major Cullen Rutherford_   
_p.s. you better not have lost the coin._

Her smile turned into a laugh at that last part. _The Coin_...Cullen...It had been 9 months since she'd seen her childhood friend. Cullen was in the Orlesian army now...  
Cullen grew up in Ferelden but visited Orlais in the summer with his family to see his Uncle who was a soldier in Queen Victoria's army. Cullen had gone on a walk to take a break from his loud siblings one evening when he met Isolde. Izzie had been drawing with chalk in the street while her friend Morrigan read out loud on the steps of her house. The book Morrigan was reading was in Elven and Izzie was nonchalantly translating as she read. Cullen was intrigued so he picked up a piece of chalk and started listening too. The three of them talked until it got dark and Morrigan couldn't read anymore.

  
When she wasn't with Morrigan he could find her by the river half a mile from town humming to herself and looking at the water. One day he invited her to go fishing with him. Cullen taught her to fish as they exchanged stories about each other's large families. Cullen would eventually meet Izzie's three younger siblings and all of them would go to the park to play. In the evening Izzie would sneak out to meet Cullen. They would talk about the differences in Ferelden and Orlais, pranks they played on their siblings, (or Morrigan) his favorite food and her favorite plants. Joke about how nice it was to find some quiet time away for an hour or two. They loved their families- there was no doubt there, but the break from the chaos was nice. Getting together to walk along the river or go to the docks to watch the ships come and go were moments Izzie treasured. 

  
Cullen hated leaving after that first summer but he promised he'd be back the following summer. He left a silver coin with Izzie before he left and promised he'd be back for it. Year after year Izzie would give him back the coin she promised to keep safe. Eventually his father and Uncle had a falling out though and the family didn't come up from Ferelden every summer. Still Cullen missed his friends. Sending letters back and forth wasn't enough. When Cullen got older he bought himself a train ticket to visit more frequently instead. Eventually Val Royeaux was just as familiar as his hometown in Ferelden.

.  
..  
...  
Izzie took a moment to herself to look back fondly on those memories before Cole pulled her to the present.

"Izzie, they were out of Elfroot in the market. Izzie?" Cole questioned.

Coming back to the present Izzie looked up from her letter, " That's ok, I have the feeling my upcoming order isn't urgent yet."

"Izzie?"

"Yes?"

"Is there more cocoa?"

"Yes." Izzie got up and got Cole more Cocoa before he left. She almost forgot the orders she had finished and ran back into the street to catch him before Cole got too far. As Izzie turned back to head inside she caught sight of an Elfroot plant growing in the middle of the sidewalk on the side of the house. She casually walked over to the plant to inspect it. It wasn’t ready to harvest by any means but she could keep an eye on it. It wasn't terribly in the way. Hopefully no one would step on it. She turned and walked back inside.   
The rest of the day she spent making extra salves and tinctures she knew people liked to order. She labeled them and put them in small satchels. She and Faline had dinner together and talked about current events they had gathered from the local paper and the growing animosity towards Elves in Orlais. 

"There are so few Elves that you hear of with magic anyways, I don't know why people suddenly have a stick up their bum about it. What's so scary about someone who has a little healing magic or someone who can levitate things?" Izzie said between bites of her hearty beef stew Faline made them.

"You know as well as I that that's not the magic these shemlen fear. Its telepathy, its fire, lightning, it’s whatever else kind of magic they don't know exists." Faline pauses to take a bite of stew and continues, "When there is rumor of a plague going around. Who do they blame? When the weather changes drastically and a storm takes out a ship. Who do they say must have put a curse on it?'' Faline puts her bowl down and tears a piece of rosemary bread in half and hands the other half to Izzie.

Izzie replied " I know...They blame Elves....I'm aware. Our ancestors were so proud of their heritage, magical prowess and their accomplishments they had to go write it all down in numerous books, they had to paint murals about it, sing songs about it...All for the glory of a dead empire. Now we are scattered and few."

Faline leans forward and reaches for her wine glass she had forgotten about. She takes a longer sip and plays with the stem in her hand. Thinking about her next words....  
"I've heard a rumor...King Edward is supposedly looking into these "dangerous" Elves or magic users and rounding them up. Not sure what he plans on doing with them. Makes me nervous." Faline takes another sip of wine as she shakes her head.

Izzie sets down her finished stew and takes a piece of bread and leans back in her chair in the kitchen. “Well if it's something I need to worry about, I'm sure Cullen will warn me. He still thinks the King is a good man. I know the King has mixed feelings about magic users but at least he's not entirely anti-Elf."

Faline finishes her wine and responds "Well the King may be all right, but there are still people in his circle that aren't. I've heard of a few advisors of his that are definitely not Elven friendly...Speaking of Cullen though, when did he say he would be in town?"

Izzie smiles to herself, "This week or next possibly, I was going to ask if you had heard anything more about this "Sam" that Morrigan mentioned but I guess it's someone Cullen knows. Sounds like he'll be coming by the house eventually."

Faline smiles at Izzie and focuses on her face, "Are you ever going to tell me if you two were ever an item? I'm not blind you know. The way you smile when his name is mentioned is very telling. You should never play Wicked Grace."

  
Izzie snickers and looks at Faline knowing the tips of her ears are getting red. The question may be simple but the answer isn't. "We were never an item per say...Just..." Izzie looks away then looks down. After a few moments, suddenly more solem....  
A deep breath and heavy exhale.... " I don't know. I-I didn't get the chance to find out. Timing wasn't right really. I thought maybe...But then the whole world changed...MY whole world changed and.. I don't know. There were _definitely_ feelings...In fact there still are feelings. Just..." Another pause. " It's complicated. He's my best friend besides Morrigan. They are the only family I have now."

"Ouch! Yeah ok what am I then?" Faline nudges Izzie's shoulder playfully.

Izzie smirks and nudges her back " You are my family too Faline, you know that. "

Faline smiles and winks at her " I know dear, it's just too fun to tease you." Faline pauses and after a beat continues "The amount of letters you two send each other....It's clear you mean alot to him."

Izzie cocks her head to the side and smiles at Faline, "I know."

  
They sit in silence for a while until Faline gets up and grabs their dishes and cleans up the kitchen. Izzie helps dry as best she can one handed and puts the bowls back in the cupboard. Izzie then heads to the den on the other side of the house and adds wood to the fire in the fireplace, making the room more cozy and warm. She grabs a blanket out of her hope chest and curls up on the couch. The warmth from the fire she hopes soothes her already aching left shoulder. She thinks about the day, the Elfroot she needs to hunt down, the herbs she thinks she'll run low on next, the letter from Cullen…  
Cullen will be in town soon. She smiles to herself and watches the fire. As Izzie starts to drift off, Faline comes by and gives her a quick kiss on the forehead before heading to bed. Izzie smiles to herself when she can hear Faline quietly going up the stairs...

As she drifts off to sleep, Izzie remembers a happy memory...

  
**4 years ago...**

  
Izzie’s toes are in the water on the edge of the lake. Her legs dangle off the dock and she's swaying to a tune in her head. She's forgotten about the fishing pole in her hands. She let her grip go slack.   
Cullen is standing off to the side with his fishing pole restringing bait . He clears his throat before speaking softly,

"Izzie?"

  
The sun is setting on the water and she's looking off into the distance, amber hues bouncing off the reflection in the lake, lost in her own thoughts....  
A little louder this time. "Izzie?"

"Hmmm?" She replies and cocks her head toward him. She notices the warm glow from the setting sun hitting him in just the right light. His blonde hair looking more golden than usual.

" Izzie, I-I think you've lost your bait again." A warm chuckle escapes as he smiles. He knows she didn't really want to go fishing. Just wanted an excuse to spend time together somewhere more quiet.   
She looks out to her pole and looks back at him. A slight eye roll with some obvious sarcasm. 

"I really don't think there are any fish here today. You haven't even gotten a nibble have you?"

Cullen shifts his posture and replies. "I thought I had. But it could have been a rock."  
He wasn't really fishing either. If he had actually planned on catching anything he would have suggested they move down the lake to find a better spot an hour ago.  
Izzie puts her pole down, closes her eyes and tilts her head back. She's still swaying to whatever tune she must have in her head. She peeks over at Cullen who just smiles and watches her a moment before re-casting his line.

  
The sun is going down but it's still fairly warm out. There's a slight breeze but nothing bone chilling yet. Maybe in a month or so she thinks. He's got 2 more days with her till he leaves for basic training. These moments will be harder to come by. She always knew he'd join the military. She thinks about the excitement he must be feeling, he gets to see new places and learn new things. To learn how to protect and serve. She's happy for him of course. They have always supported each other. But now all she wants is a few more days. A few more days of sitting in silence, pretending to fish. A few more nights sneaking to the rooftop of her family's home and looking at the stars . A few more...moments...

  
After a few more minutes Cullen admits defeat and reels in his line and puts his pole down. He casually walks over to Izzie's spot on the dock and sits next to her. She shuffles a moment to angle herself to the side with one leg bent on the dock and the other still dangling off the edge. Cullen mirrors her to face her. She looks up at him as he looks out at the water. He's so handsome like this. He looks peaceful and relaxed. Of course they had that effect on each other. When one of them was frustrated or anxious, the other would calm them down. They didn't always need to talk. Just his presence was soothing to her.   
They sat there in silence for a bit. She recalled moments when they would play with each others siblings and Cullen would just stand there while they climbed on top of him. She had made the mistake of calling them all 'monkeys' one day so naturally they found Cullen and decided he was a tree. They would grab onto his legs and arms and Cullen would pretend to fall down over and over again. "Oh no! A storm is coming! I can't take it! I'm going to fall! Timber!!!" The shrieks from his little sister Rosalie, and her little brother Ben laughing and playing.  
Everyone was growing up now. Remembering Cullen being a tree made her chuckle to herself. It was a louder laugh than she thought it was. Cullen took his focus from the water and looked at Izzie. His face questioning the sudden laugh.   
Looking up at him a little from her slouch, "Do you remember when we used to play as kids and I told Rosalie that she and the others were monkeys?" 

He smirked, "Yes, I remember." A small smile started to grow on Cullen's face as he looked at Izzie. 

"Do you remember what you decided to be?" She asked. 

A low huff of a laugh, "Yes, I wasn't very good at playing pretend so I said I was a tree."

"I've got a pretty good imagination. I thought it was clever. I pictured you a tall, old Oak tree." She tilts her chin up and smirks at him.

"Whoa, first I'm a tree and now I'm old? Izzie, I'm only 2 years older than you." 

She laughed and smiled at him. She explained, " Alright, just a _tall,_ Oak tree."  
Cullen shifted a little, his expression seemingly amused and waiting for her to elaborate. He knew she had quite the imagination and there was a reason she said it. She blushed. She had multiple reasons for comparing him to an Oak tree. Not sure how much she wanted to say. If he thought this was cheesy he would likely tease her about it later. Nope... _Time to be more bold,_ she thought. 

She cleared her throat and looked him straight in his amber eyes. "You are built like an Oak tree. You are tall and strong. You are always there when I’ve needed you. You don't back down. You stay true to your convictions. Even if the whole world tells you to move. You'd plant yourself like a tree, look them in the eye and say "No, you move".

She pauses a moment to let her words sink in. She thought he'd chuckle by now. But he suddenly looked more serious. She continued, "Whatever challenges ahead you face. No matter what storms try to knock you down. I know you'll persevere. I couldn't be more proud of you".

  
His eyes were wide. She hadn't realized it but he had scooted his left hand further towards hers. After a moment he looked down and slowly walked his hand over to hers and took it gently, rubbing his thumb across the top of her knuckles.   
Her head tilted down to acknowledge his hand. As she looked up to him slowly she realized he'd come closer to her face. Close enough to smell the Witch-hazel aftershave she gave him. A deep breath and slow exhale. 

Cullen replied, " I-I...Izzie..." He searched her face. Couldn't find the words. She had left him speechless. She was beginning to look worried though. 

Softly and quietly like it was a secret he had been holding on to..."Izzie, I adore you...You know that right?"  
She visibly relaxed at that. Hoping what she said didn't freak him out. She expected it would take him a moment to respond. He didn't always have a way with words. But this time he did. Her worried expression fell and she smiled at him. "I-I know..."

He cut her off as his right hand quickly found the nape of her neck and pulled her into him. His lips meeting hers. She didn't dare move. She had hoped for this for so long but wasn't sure he felt the same way. They had teasingly flirted with one another, but it hadn't gone past that. It was always light, never serious.  
After the initial shock she slowly kissed him back. Tentatively he caressed her cheekbone with his thumb and deepened the kiss. He took his time. Gave her opportunity to pull away if he was coming on too strong. But she wasn't done being bold. 

  
She took her left hand and grabbed the front of his shirt to pull him closer. His lips dragged across hers slowly at first but as she pulled him, he changed the pressure. The grip she had was firm. Full of intention. He responded in kind and slipped in his tongue, his head tilting to the side to get a better angle. His right hand traveling up through her brown wavy hair. Her chest had been so tight with anticipation. Every time he looked at her a little longer than usual. Every time he hugged her a little longer. She had wondered if he was feeling the same. Her heart now was singing. She felt so safe and warm like this.   
His breath was hot. His hands warm. After a few moments in utter bliss, he pulled back slowly to look at her. Her eyes still closed, her head tilted back. Both his hands cradling her head now. As she slowly opened her eyes she looked at Cullen. If she had any doubt that he had feelings for her--this cleared it up. He was absolutely beaming. His warm smile made her melt in his hands. Perfectly content.   
His thumbs caressed her cheeks as he spoke,

" I-I’m going to miss you so much." A pause again as he looked her over lovingly. Tucking a loose wave behind her ear. "As soon as I know the official address of where I'm going for training, I'll send you a letter. You'll write back I hope?"

"Of course I will." As she replied she put her weight on her palms on the dock and lifted herself up to her knees. With her movement, Cullen released his hands from her face and switched to holding her by the waist, now looking up at her from his position still sitting on the dock. She gently put both her hands on his freshly shaved face. One of her thumbs wandering to graze his beautiful lips. She wasn't looking at him. More like through him. She leaned down and gave him another kiss. His hands on her waist moved up her back and pulled her flush with him. After a minute she pulled her lips from his, slowly and reluctantly and smiled at him ... 

"We should head back. Your family will want to spend time with you before you leave. Also it’s getting dark."

  
"Ahh" Cullen finally took his eyes off her and looked towards the horizon. "So it is..." They got up from the docks, picked up their fishing poles and walked back to town. A little ways down the road, Cullen caught Izzie smiling and looking at him. She blushed when he met her eyes, but he took her free hand in his and gave it a squeeze, smiling back at her. They walked hand in hand to her family's small, two story house and paused at the front door. They could hear her siblings playing loudly through the door and Izzie’s mother telling them to brush their teeth before bed. Izzie hadn't wanted to go in yet. She would help her mother put them to bed in a moment.  
With one hand on his fishing pole and one hand on her waist he leaned down and gently kissed her forehead.  
As he pulled back he had a weird look on his face. "What's that face for?" She asked. 

He replied, "I was just thinking...If I'm a tall Oak tree. What does that make you?" 

  
She laughed heartily at that. "I don't know, certainly not a monkey I hope."   
They both shared a chuckle as a colder breeze swept by making Izzie shiver. Cullen took both their poles and leaned them against the house to take her by the shoulders and pull her into him. This time wrapping not just his arms around her but his coat as well. Her arms found their way snuggly around his waist under his coat. 

Cullen replied, "I don't think you are a monkey." He had a puzzling look in his face like he was about to be clever. She couldn't wait...He continued "I think you are my little Sparrow. If I'm a tree, then you are the bird I protect from the harsh elements and the cold." 

  
He kissed the top of her head, nuzzling his face in the soft waves of her hair. Izzie smiled into his warm chest. "I love that".  
They shared one more kiss before she went inside after saying goodnight to Cullen. Cullen grabbed both poles and headed back to the Inn his family was staying at in Val Royeaux.   
Two more days left till he left for basic training. Two more days to steal as many moments with her as possible. Izzie clung to these memories like a lifeline. Half way through Cullen's basic training, her life got turned upside down in the worst way...Everything changed after that.  
.  
..  
...


	2. Ir Abelas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Sam" shows up at Izzie's doorstep. Cole makes a new friend.

Chapter 2

Ir Abelas

  
Five days passed since Cullens letter came in. Izzie's orders for medicines increased as the colder weather set in. At least a dozen orders were for pain and anti-inflammatory needs due to the flu season. Unfortunately, that meant she needed to find more Elfroot. Faline was able to find extra pots in the basement for more Elfroot plants but it would take so much time to grow more. Izzie needed Elfroot for her medicine sooner rather than later. She still had a little extra on the side she kept as her reserves. But that was already made into a tincture for "Sam" who hadn’t come by yet.

  
Izzie stood in front of her desk and paused to stretch her arms and twist her wrist till it made a popping sound. She tilted her neck back and forth too, trying to ease the tension as she looked out the window. Another trail of white puffy smoke followed by another train coming in. She looked down at the street to check on the Elfroot plant outside coming through the sidewalk. Looked like maybe there was some she could harvest. She took her last sip of her morning coffee and set it down. She strolled over to her armoire and pulled out her jacket, a scarf and her oversized hat. The time it takes her to get dressed to go outside will take longer than the actual trip outside. So much effort when one only has one arm. The thought makes her feel impatient and as she swings her jacket around her shoulder - " _Crash"_

  
"Dammit" She says out loud. She turns around to inspect the mess of glass on the floor. 

  
_"Crunch"_

  
The glass under her feet is not piercing through thankfully. She had her slippers on. She bends to start carefully cleaning it up. Izzie pauses a moment and remembers her mother knocking a glass vial over too. _Clumsy must run in the family. The thing that didn't was magic..._ Izzie's thoughts trailed off, remembering the moment she realized she had magic. Her mother had cut herself doing the same thing. Izzie had been nearby and quickly grabbed a cloth to stop the bleeding, but when she uncovered the wound it was all healed up. At first her mother looked horrified, Izzie thought, but then it softened to a smile. "You are special da'len. Ma serannas." Her mother had said, calming her fears. She was only 10 at the time. She had just made friends with Morrigan down the street. 

  
Izzie finishes cleaning up the glass and takes her mess downstairs to dispose of it in the kitchen waste bin. Faline is sitting at the kitchen table reading this morning's paper. She looks up from her paper at Izzie, "Where are you going?"

  
"Just outside," Izzie replies, "There's an Elfroot plant growing in the middle of the sidewalk I've had my eye on." Faline nods and turns her attention back to her paper.  
Izzie starts to head for the door and as she reaches for the door handle she hears a knock.

_"Tap tap tap"_

  
Izzie looks through the peephole through the door to see what looks like a very tall man standing in front of the door. She can't get a good look at him, all she can see is his chest she thinks. _It's fine, my ears are covered anyways. Hold your head up high. You are Lady Isolde...Lady Isolde,_ She thinks to herself as she opens the door.

  
"That was quick. I had barely knocked" She heard him say. He was very tall. Almost as tall as the door. Or maybe it just felt that way. Izzie was pretty short for an Elf. She looked him up and down. He was wearing a dark blue reefer coat that should have ended about his hip but seemed too short for him, brown tweed trousers, grey gloves, and a newsboy hat. Out from under his hat were pointed Elven ears and a long white braid that wrapped around his shoulder. It took her a moment to take in. Who was this very tall Elf at her door? She looked at his face realizing he had just said something. His face very serious.

  
"Sorry, I-I was just heading out -uh-when you knocked." She replied, stepping back a moment to get a better look at him.

  
"Oh, Im sorry, I-I can come back later." The Elf replied flatly. Facial expression neutral but his hands fidgeting to find his coat pockets.

  
"Oh, no, it's fine. What can I do for you?" Izzie said as she tilted her chin up.

  
"I-I well I was sent here to this address by a friend. Said someone named 'Izzie' would be here?" His expression questioning- his demeanor more anxious seeming. Izzie paused. Hearing her nickname instead of 'Lady Isolde' made her narrow down exactly who this was. "Are you Sam?"

  
A relieved "Yes" and then a slight smile. " Major Rutherford said you could help me."

  
"Absolutely" She said matter of factly. _That must mean Cullen is in town early!_ Confident this man was harmless she motioned her hand to usher him in from the cold. Upon hearing the exchange, Faline came around the corner.

  
"Can I get you something to warm you up Mr. Sam?" Faline chimed in. "Tea? Coffee?"

  
Sam turned to look at Faline. “Tea would be lovely, thank you."

  
Faline turned to head back to the kitchen as Izzie offered Sam a spot to sit on the sofa with her in the living room. She paused then addressed him, "Cullen said you get headaches? Can you tell me more about that? Is it due to loud noises? Or too much noise? Or is it more of a chronic thing?"

  
The tall Elf looked a little puzzled at her. "I take it Cullen didn't mention-" His voice trailed off and then he continued "I-uh had an injury a while ago. Since then I get headaches. Sunlight bouncing off the frost on the ground doesn't help either. My eyes are a bit sensitive to light now."

  
"What kind of injury? If you don't mind me asking?" Izzie asked. Her browline softening hoping she wasn't overstepping.

  
"It’s fine, I-uh...It's from a concussion I got a month ago." His hesitation told her there was more to it, but she wouldn't press the issue. 

  
Faline was back with tea for Sam. " Thank you" He said as he reached for his cup. Faline smiled politely and sat down as Izzie rose from her seat in the living room. "Let me go get what I've made for you." Izzie went upstairs to get his salve and tincture and came back. In the minute she was gone, Faline was already prodding him for more information. 

  
"How do you know Cullen then?" Faline asked, taking a seat next to him on the sofa.  
"I met him on the train coming here. I was sitting in coach by myself and he came and offered me a drink to pass the time. We got to chatting about life and how he was on leave. Talked about the military a bit. He-" 

  
Sam paused to look at Izzie as she had come back with a satchel for him in hand. She had put it down on the coffee table and decided she wasn't going outside yet so she'd begun to take off her oversized jacket and hat.

  
"Your-..." He paused choosing his next words carefully. What he was looking at was her lack of a left arm. He hadn't noticed earlier. He also didn't realize she was an Elf. The oversized jacket and hat hid it. " You're- an Elf too?" He choked out the words- hoping it came out smoothly.  
Izzie had just sat down. She knew he was making more of a mental note of her arm not her ears. She shifted a little in the lounge chair across from the sofa. " Yes, I'm an Elf too." She said with a hint of a laugh. Awkwardness hanging in the air, but she smiled at him to ease the tension. He didn't mean to offend. She could tell. 

  
There was another knock at the door. "Tap tap tap" Izzie's heart jumped in her chest, realizing it could be Cullen. Izzie and Sam watched Faline get up to get the door.

  
"Oh there you are! Come in! Come in!" Faline said. As she stepped to the side, Izzie had barely started to rise from her chair to see who it was. It wasn't Cullen. It was Cole. She had started to sit back down until she saw what Cole was carrying. Elfroot! yes! He found some!

  
Izzie got up and glided over to Cole to take the huge bundle of Elfroot he was holding out for her. Cole was so pleased with himself, a huge smile across his pale face. "I made a friend today." He said to Izzie excitedly, “He grows his own. He said I could take all I needed." Izzie looked at Cole in surprise and then back down at the herbs. The bundle was especially prettier than most. There was more blue running through the tips of the leaves than on normal Elfroot. "The man said it was more potent. That you'd like it. Its called Royal Elfroot." Izzie smiled and handed the bundle to Faline at the door and threw her arm around Cole for a hug, pulling him in close. Cole could see Sam over Izzie's shoulder looking at them. Amused? Confused?

  
Izzie gave Cole a squeeze as she whispered in his ear. " This is wonderful Cole. This is going to help so many sick people. Thank you so much. What do I owe you? Or the man who gave you the Elfroot?"  
Cole spoke up. "No charge Izzie" and then he whispered back, " He's like you Izzie. He's special. He can make the plants grow back very fast."  
Izzie pulled back to look at him, puzzled at what he said. She took his hand and squeezed it and smiled. Unsure of what to say.  
"I've got to go," He said to Izzie and Faline. Faline nodded and slipped some coin in his pocket while he wasn't looking and winked at Izzie as Cole closed the door behind him.   
Turning back to Sam who had been watching the exchange, Izzie made her way to the sofa to sit facing him. She grabbed the satchel and took out the salve. He reached out his hand to help her take the lid off. Wondering to himself how she manages to make things like this with only one hand.

  
"Here", She says, "Let me show you how much so you don't use too much." She took a teaspoon size amount and warmed it up between her fingers. "Where does it hurt the most?" Holding the tin in one hand, he took his other hand and took off his hat and moved his braid out of the way, revealing what looked like an old bruise across his left temple and shaved scalp. Izzie noted the skin discoloration and how far the bruise really went. Looking closer now she saw the remnants of a scar that will likely form there as well. She had held her hand up to start to apply the salve when she hesitated. "Tell me if this is too much pressure."

  
The Elf nodded at her to proceed. She started a small circle in the center and gradually moved around the area. He winced a moment and she quickly drew her hand away. "Ir Abelas" she said. 

  
He smiled at that. She was surprised. He had been so serious and clearly had been in some pain. "No, Da'len..Ir Abelas." He grinned. Izzie shot him a confused look. My name isn't really Sam. Its Abelas." He stated. 

  
She still looked confused. " Your name is Sorrow?"

  
He looked down and back up at her. "Yes, not many Elves actually speak their own language. I was surprised to hear you say it. It seems people in this area of the world just want everyone to speak 'common'. Or maybe people have forgotten." His eyes downcast then met hers. 

  
She sighed and nodded in agreement "My mother made sure I knew enough to read it and understand it."

  
"It is admirable for your mother to try to preserve that knowledge." He said.  
"I thought so too. She passed down her knowledge of herbs and their medicinal qualities too. Taught me how to care for people like she and my father did."

  
She paused, wondering to herself if this was a moment she could be bold. Did she give too much information already? Maybe Cullen knew she could do more to heal him. Izzie could hear her mother's words in her head. "Have courage, and be kind" She would always say...  
Izzie chose her words carefully "You know, they _say_ there are people out there who can wield magic and heal those in pain. Too bad it is frowned upon in Orlais..." There was a heavy pause after she said that. She hoped he caught what she said. She looked him straight in his golden eyes to gauge his reaction. He was actually quite handsome even though he looked so stern.

  
It took him a second but he looked at her and raised an eyebrow. "I can't imagine frowning at anyone trying to heal me. Especially if their method is...Effective." He paused. 

  
Eavesdropping in the corner was Faline. "Izzie-..." Faline's tone sounding like a mother scolding their child. She knew exactly what Izzie was doing.

  
Izzie shot her a look for a moment and then back at Abelas. She gave him a small smile. "Lean forward for me. I think I missed a spot." She said with a glimmer in her eye. Abelas leaned forward as Izzie extended her hand out to meet the side of his head. The area of the bruising about the size of Izzie's hand. She took a breath to steady herself. It had been a while since she's done this. 

  
She closed her eyes and focused on her healing ability. A cooling energy pooled from deep within and radiated down her arm and through to her fingertips. Her fingers buzzed as it reached Abelas . To her surprise she didn't feel him even flinch. She assumed he would. Not everyone knows what it feels like being healed like this. Unless he-...? She could feel his pulse beat steadily and felt his body relax. After a minute she opened her eyes and looked at his temple to no longer see bruising. A mostly healed scar was still across his head but it looked much better. Abelas had closed his eyes while she worked her magic. Izzie retracted her hand when she felt like that was as much as she could do. He opened his eyes and took a slow inhale and exhale. "Ma serannas". He still seemed like the serious type, but his features softened. Looked like he wasn't in pain anymore.

  
Izzie put the lid back on the jar in Abelas' hand. "You're welcome Abelas. Or do you prefer Sam?"

  
"Abelas is fine." Small smile and nod.

  
"Abelas, I -I can only do so much. You may still need the salve as a topical treatment and the tincture for any inflammation. If it ever gets unbearable, let me know." 

  
Abelas thanked Izzie again, left her some coin and went on his way. Izzie closed the door behind him. When she turned around, Faline caught her attention. Eyebrow raised and a smirk on her face, shaking her head back and forth. "Tsk tsk tsk" Izzie knew what was coming. Still, she was too pleased with herself at the moment. "You are too nice da'len, you can't just assume every Elf is safe to use your magic around. You're lucky he seemed like the honorable sort."

  
"Cullen said I'd like him." A hint of sass in her voice. "Besides, that was quite the bruise. Looked serious. I had a good feeling about him. He didn't even flinch when I touched him."  
"Truly? Even I flinched a little when I cut myself chopping carrots that one time. It's an odd feeling your magic." Faline and Izzie walked to the kitchen. Izzie sat down at the table gazing at the beautiful bundle of Elfroot Cole brought her. Faline found Izzie’s coffee cup and filled it for her again sitting down next to her.

  
"Thank you." Izzie sat there drinking her coffee."I don't think I'll need that Elfroot from the sidewalk now." Izzie gestured toward the pile of herbs on the table, coffee cup steaming in her hand. 

  
"Certainly looks like it." Faline said, as she reached forward carefully playing with one of the leaves of the plant. "Unfortunate that they weren't pulled with the roots still intact though. You could have replanted one in your room."

  
"I'm sort of glad Cole brought them here like this." She said thoughtfully, tilting her head to the side. The puzzling look on her face back. "Cole said he made a friend. That he's special like me. Can make the plants grow very fast or something-." She trailed off as Faline gave her a look. "Maybe I can convince Cole to take me to his friend so I can get one that's replantable."

  
Faline sighed, "Izzie, if this mysterious, fancy 'Elfroot man' is special like you. He probably wants to remain anonymous like you."

  
Izzie chuckled at 'Elfroot man' and took a sip of coffee and nodded her head in agreement. "You are probably right. Maybe Cole can help me think of a way to thank him then."

  
Izzie sits there and leans back, sipping more of her coffee until she notices out of the corner of her eye that Faline is smirking at her. She turns to Faline, whose smirk turns into a grin she can't hold back. Mischievous, Izzie thinks as she raises an eyebrow at her. "What?"

  
"Oh, nothing da'len." Faline grins wider as she pretends to inspect her nails. " It's just that Cole was by earlier this morning to give us a message from Morrigan."

  
"Oh?" Izzie replies, not sure why she's being so coy.

  
"Yes, apparently she's got an appointment with the Duke right before Cullen does today. Probably about how Gaspard needs more lyrium for the military's lyrium laced weapons. "Special projects" or something-bla bla bla." Faline stalls and fidgets in her chair looking at Izzie, who is doing her best not to let Faline know she's growing impatient with her game.   
Izzie stares through Faline until she finally gives in. "Your sister just wanted to say that she told Cullen already that he needn't get a room at an Inn and that she told him to stay here in one of the guest rooms. We will need to make one ready for him-" 

  
Izzie smiled big and cut her off, gulping down the last of her coffee, nearly slamming it down on the table. Standing up so fast she made Faline startle. "Well we better get his room ready then." Shes says matter of factly trying to hide her girlish giddiness she knows Faline wants to tease her with. As she starts to head out of the kitchen, Faline continues, " Actually, you can go get his room ready. I need to start preparations for dinner tonight. Apparently his father and brother are coming too, to celebrate his 4 years in the military-."

  
That stops Izzie in the doorway, " Ahh" She says a little hesitantly. A deep breath as she slowly lets it out. "I haven't seen them in a long time." Her fingers tap the doorframe. Another pause as Faline looks at her now trying to read her sudden change of pace. "A long time now. It'll be--good to see them again."

  
Izzie walks more solem up the stairs towards her room, anxiety, nervous energy, but still happy she'll get to see Cullen tonight. She heads to her bathroom sink to fish for something in the cabinet below. _Witch-hazel aftershave._ He'll appreciate this. Izzie smiles softly to herself holding the small bottle in her hand. She gets up and wanders to one of the guest rooms to get it ready for Cullen.  
.  
..  
...


	3. Her Tall Oak Tree

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen's train ride with Abelas.

He isn't very comfortable in his seat, there's not much leg room at all. If he lifts his legs he can extend them to the other side but just barely. The edges of his combat boots have slush on the edges still. Wouldn't want to make a mess of a potential passengers seat. _That's what you get for not buying the more expensive sleeper cabin and opting for sitting in coach though._ Cullen scolds himself as he wipes condensation off his whiskey glass and takes another sip. There were 3 other passengers in this cabin compartment, now only he remains. It's awfully quiet now without them. It doesn't really matter though. He's _finally_ on leave. The view out the window seat of the mountains covered in snow, the window itself frosted on its edges is helping him lose himself in his thoughts. Well, that and the whiskey. He's happy and contemplative, even if he's having trouble relaxing. He's anxious to go home. Well not his hometown of Honnleath. His other home. Val Royeaux. _"They say home is where your heart is."_   
Since his teens it's where he found himself wanting to be. He loved visiting his Uncle Kenneth. Looked up to him. Kenneth was part of some Elite regiment of the Orlesian army. Special Forces of some kind. Couldn't talk about it in detail, so naturally it made Cullen want to be a part of it more. Cullen's father had wanted him to join the Ferelden army but Cullen argued that Uncle Kenneth could get him into the Orlesian army with no trouble. That and since Orlais was bigger and better funded, he would have more opportunities in Orlais. His sister Mia would tease him that there was another reason Cullen had wanted to be in Orlais. "It couldn't possibly be the adorable brown haired elf you used to ditch us for every Summer, could it Brother?" Mia would nudge his shoulder and giggle as Cullen stood still as a statue trying not to let her get a rise out of him.

  
Cullen had boarded the train about an hour ago, already hating how long this train ride was going to take. _Nearly a week traveling by train isn't that bad..._ He tries to convince himself. Again he tries to adjust his position, resting one leg over the other at his ankle. _Maybe when I switch trains I'll buy the sleeper cabin,_ he thinks. 

  
The need to stretch his legs overwhelms him not even half an hour later. He gets up to travel down a vestibule to another train car. This one is for standing passengers only. There aren't many passengers left so there's ample room to walk around a bit. He strolls down the train car walking past various passengers, till his eyes land on an Elf sitting on the floor. The Elfs' got his back to the wall and legs straight out in front of himself, hands folded and his newsboy hat pulled down a bit. _Can't see his eyes, must be sleeping._ As the train moves, the other passengers hold on to their piece of railing. Not this Elf. Must be tired if he's decided to sit on the floor of this dirty cabin. There's mud and slush streaked boot prints all over the ground from the snow outside. He looks the Elf over again and notices the side of his head is bruised and cut pretty bad. Ruffed up white braid and hat obscuring some of it. It takes him a moment but he realizes this Elf may not be simply sleeping. Cullen opens his mouth to address the elf.

"Hey there friend, are you alright?" He asks as he bends and starts to kneel towards him.   
The Elf stirs and lifts his head up to look at Cullen with a sharp inhale. “Sorry, am I in your way? I can move." He says sleepily. 

  
The Elf moves to get up as Cullen raises his hand. "No, you're not. I just noticed your head wound. Wanted to make sure you hadn't-- passed out. It looks bad." 

  
The Elf relaxes and sits again, pulling a knee up to his chest and leaning his head back against the wall. "It's not pleasant, but I'll survive." The Elf winches a little. Pained expression on his face. 

  
Cullen was about to tell him he should get it looked at when the stewardess walked by. Blonde human in a uniform holding a tray to her side. "Oh! Major, I was just heading to your cabin to see if you needed a refill ?" 

  
The Elf and Cullen looked at each other and then at her. Cullen replied, "Yes that would be lovely, could you make it two for me and my friend here?" 

  
The stewardess gave him a wink, "Of course Major. I'll bring them to your cabin." 

  
She looked him up and down, not even acknowledging the Elf at all. As the stewardess left, Cullen reached out his hand to the Elf on the floor. "Come, there's room in my cabin. Share a drink with me? It'll at least be more comfortable than the floor." 

  
The Elf looked at him, puzzled at the kindness from a stranger, and a human no less. He hadn't exactly had a good track record with humans of this era yet. He was in no position to turn down this curious human's generosity. With some hesitation in his voice the Elf answers, "I'd appreciate it." 

  
Cullen reached out his hand to pull him up. " Im Cullen- Cullen Rutherford."

  
"Abelas"

.  
..  
...

  
"Are you telling me your parents _actually_ named you Sorrow?" Cullen asked him, pouring him another drink. The stewardess had come by a few more times to refill their drinks and left them the rest of the bottle. It was dark outside now and both of them more intoxicated than they planned to be. Cullen welcomed the distraction from the long train ride and the ache he was feeling in his legs.   
Holding his drink out to Cullen to fill with more whiskey, "Not exactly, name was given to me by -a -uh- previous master I guess you'd say." Abelas took a sip and made a disgusted face at the liquor. 

  
Cullen replied, "Served in a nobleman's house?"

  
Abelas took his drink and held it gently to his temple, swaying slightly from the movement of the train."Noble woman actually, I -uh protected the house." 

  
Cullen took another sip," Like security detail or something?" Cullen asked. 

  
"Something like that, yes" 

  
It wasn't exactly a lie. It was an overly simplified truth he supposed. There's no way this human would care or even believe that he was actually a Sentinel that was tasked with guarding an ancient temple. It was definitely more than just a job. It was a calling. An honor. A sacred duty...But no more. Six months ago was the last time he woke up; he knew this was it. He was the only one left. The Temple to Mythal had fallen, along with the Vir' Abelasan. He left the Arbor Wilds and traveled North. He remembers last time he woke hearing of a growing city that way. He wonders what that looks like. Val Royeaux it is...

  
.

  
After a long pause "So she named you ' _Sad_ '?" Cullen was stuck on this detail. 

  
Abelas took another sip of his whiskey, still trying not to make a face at the foreign taste "Yes."

A chuckle escapes Cullen as he slurs his words slightly, "Well- If I had reason to hire you and re-name you I think I'd call you 'Sam".

The Elf smiled a little at that. "I like that...'Sam"

An hour or so later, both of them are still feeling tipsy. Abelas' more intoxicated than Cullen now, not accustomed to this kind of alcohol. His cheeks showing some pink. Cullen's maintaining their natural rosy hue. They had been quiet a while. Cullen didn't want to pry but was curious.

"So where are from 'Sam?" Cullen said with a smile. Hoping the elf wouldn't mind his attempt at humor. 

Amused look on his face, but not offended, the liquor making him feel more at ease. "I had a home in the Arbor Wilds.-Ever been there?"

"Can't say I have." Cullen replied, "I've heard it's beautiful though. Seen an artist's rendering of it once. I'm sure it doesn't do it justice though. The trees there look huge. Old growth trees untouched by man. Im sure its breathtaking in person" A pause and then a chuckle that prompted a questioning look from Abelas.

"Sorry," Cullen explained. " I have a friend that used to call me a tree. An Oak tree."

"That's an odd thing to call a person." Ablelas responded.

"She's an odd girl...-I miss her." Cullen looked down at his empty glass in his hand and set it on the floor, twisting himself to try to prop his legs across his seat. Confident now that he wouldn't muck it up.

"Will you get to see this girl who calls you a tree while you're on leave?" 

"Yes," Cullen replies, "I'll send her sister a telegram at our next stop. Let her know I'm on my way. They are already expecting me."

Abelas had shifted in his seat to try to get comfortable as well. It was better than the floor. At least it was warm in the cabin. Cullen hadn't quite dozed off, his head leaning back against the window, when Abelas chimed in. "Thank you for the drink Major. My head was aching terribly. Took the edge off." He says as he raises and tilts his glass to Cullen.  
"You’re welcome." He turns his head to Abelas, "You can just call me Cullen though. I'd rather not be 'Major Rutherford' while I'm on leave." He says with a smirk. Abelas shoots him a knowing look and nods.

.  
..  
...

They slept opposite each other, feet propped up on the other seat across from them. They awoke with a jolt that startled both of them awake. The train had stopped. Cullen groaned as he stretched his arms forward, trying to ease the aches all over from sleeping so awkwardly. Abelas had adjusted in his seat resting his feet on the ground again. "Is this Val Royaeux?" Abelas asked.

Cullen shot him a confused look. "No, It's not. Got to hop off this train and transfer to one going that way. Were you headed that way as well?" 

Abelas looked out the window and sighed. "I see. I thought this train took us straight there." Looking at Cullen, "I'm afraid I don't know the region well enough to recognize it. Do you know what train to take next?"

"Yes." Replied Cullen, "I'm heading that way as well, right after I stop at this station's office. I want to send a message or two to let them know I'm on my way. You're welcome to join me. I was thinking of getting a sleeper cabin. We could split the fare that way?"

The Elf smiled at his new friend, "Thank you. Company would be nice."

The pair exited the train and headed for the station's office. Cullen knew "Val Fermin" station well. He would always stop here and send a letter or telegram to Izzie or Morrigan, letting them know he was on his way. Telegram would get there faster, but Izzie loved receiving letters. I'll let Morrigan know I'm on my way with someone. Maybe Izzie can make something for him. Cullen was still concerned about the Elf's head injury. Probably shouldn't have gotten him so drunk last night. At the office Cullen sent a telegram to Morrigan and penned a letter to Izzie. Both mentioning "Sam". He chuckled to himself. 

Abelas had waited outside. He watched the busy station fill with travelers seeking passage on the many different trains. Each carrying luggage. He didn't have any though... The view from this station looked like the last, one and two story buildings made of brick, winding streets covered in snow. A few horse drawn carriages and people going on with their lives. People coming and going from different shops, bundled up in layers to stay warm. The buildings and the shape of them were so odd to Abelas. He wondered if this was a smaller city, what would Val Royeaux look like? He found a reader board that displayed the comings and goings of the different trains. Below the display were some maps and brochures for different tourist attractions. Abelas had just begun flipping through them when Cullen put his arm on his shoulder making him jump at the contact. "Sorry Abelas, didn't mean to make you jump. I got us the nicer sleeper cabin. They recognized I was military and gave us a discount."

Abelas turned around with caution,"Did you threaten them?" Almost anger in his voice, his piercing golden eyes very accusing.

"What? No, this station just started giving military discounts. They recognized my uniform." Cullen looked at him puzzled at the accusation. Abelas relaxed, "Sorry, I wasn't aware of the custom." A pause, "That was nice of them".

After an awkward pause Cullen continued, "I've sent my messages, told them I was on my way." Cullen pulls his pocket watch out of his uniform pocket to check the time. "We've got an hour till we board the next train. We could get a bite to eat? There's a deli around the corner. Fantastic brisket sandwiches."

Abelas nods, "Lead the way."

.  
..

...

The brisket sandwiches were huge. They took their left overs with them on the next train and got settled in their nicer sleeper cabin. This time an Elven stewardess with auburn hair offered them beverages."Just water" they decided as they continued their journey.

"What are your plans in Val Royeaux Sam?" Cullen asked, placing his luggage in the overhead compartment.

A long pause. It was very telling to Cullen, he had noticed Abelas wasn't carrying luggage. He seemed like he was wandering...Lost.

Abelas finally cleared his throat,"I suppose just a change of pace. I've lived most of my life in solitude. Isolated. I wanted to see what living in a denser population was like." 

_That and he was hoping in a larger population he might be able to spot a few ancient Elvhenan like himself, if that was possible..._

"Fresh start. I can see the appeal. I wanted to see new places. One of the reasons I joined the military. Do you have a job lined up or a place to stay?" Cullen asked tentatively, hoping that wasn't too personal.

The Elf swung his legs up on his bed and propped himself up with a pillow, " Not sure . I- uh have been made aware that Elves are not always a welcome presence. I've only lived with Elves my whole life. I was not aware of the extent of hostility and prejudice against Elves. I 'apparently' provoked violence after requesting that a rather rude gentleman leave a poor servant girl alone." Abelas points to his head with his finger. His glass of ice water resting again on his temple. Cullen looked sorrowful at this revelation. 

Another long pause. Cullen felt a weight in his gut. Then Abelas spoke again. "I can not understand how others can sit idly by whilst hundreds, possibly thousands of innocent Elves are treated like less. I'll sleep more soundly when they can. Just...not sure where I'm needed yet."

Abelas' words hung heavy with Cullen. He'd seen first hand racism, prejudice, and violence against Elves. It made him sick. He replied, "I wanted to serve for that very reason. To wipe out corruption, injustice, to stand for those who can't otherwise defend themselves. To defend those who deserve a chance at a full life."

  
Abelas sighed and looked at Cullen. Maybe there were more humans like this Cullen. Maybe there was hope. Even if the Elves of this time were not his own. Perhaps he could leave it a better world. "I'm glad to hear it. That maybe there is hope." Cullen nodded in agreement.

  
They laid on their beds in their shared cabin and got some rest. Both thankful they could finally stretch out. Abelas had fallen asleep, rolled over on his side, but Cullen couldn't. His arm behind his head, knee propped up, he looked upwards and out at the mountains and snow covered trees as they passed by. Cullen's thoughts turned to Izzie.

  
.

  
After Izzie's family had died that was the first thing they thought of. Prejudice...They never figured out what happened exactly. An entire home and family destroyed by what could only be described as a bomb. The worst part, _or at least one of the worst parts,_ was that Izzie couldn't remember what happened, nothing that provided them with a lead as to who or what caused the destruction. Izzie spiraled and lost herself trying to grasp and cope with what had happened. She struggled immensely trying to make sense of it in her enormous grief. 

  
He hated that he wasn't there when it happened. He was a week away from the graduation ceremony when Morrigan finally caved and wrote him. Izzie had asked her not to. Didn't want him to be distracted during training. Morrigan knew how much they meant to each other, knew Cullen would be irate if she didn't tell him. They were good friends too, even if Cullen drove Morrigan nuts on occasion.

  
Cullen remembers racing to Morrigan's house as soon as he was on leave to find Izzie laying there in her bed, bandages wrapped around her from her hip to her armpit and then around her shoulder, stopping at what was left of her arm. Gone at her elbow. His knees had buckled as he saw her lay there. Morrigan hadn't told him the extent of her injury. He stumbled to her bed and sobbed. She looked through him. Defeated. "Cullen- I-I"...Dried tears marked her face as she let out a fresh sob the closer he got to her. He was terrified to touch her, in fear he'd hurt her. She reached out her right arm to him anyways and motioned for him to join her. He sat there holding her hand, her head on his shoulder. There were no words to describe that moment. Her family was just as much his family to him. Her younger siblings were similar ages to his own. Morrigan's mother took her in out of kindness. Cullen had been surprised. Flemeth wasn't exactly a nurturing mother to her own daughter.

  
For his two weeks on leave, he stayed by her side and comforted her the best he could without injuring her further. Flemeth sat down with Cullen one night to tell him what happened to the best of her knowledge. Some sort of magical explosion she said. Flemeth had been down a street coming home from business when she heard the unearthly detonation. The magnitude shook her and she ran to help put out the fire at Izzie's family home. According to Flemeth a stranger had pulled her out from the wreckage and fled. No one else survived the explosion.  
Flemeth pushed for Izzie to remain indoors for her safety in case there was someone out there who would try to "finish the job". Never knowing if this was a prompted attack or not. Flemeth decided if Izzie was to go outside, to have her hide her ears under oversized hats. Hoping that no one would recognize her. She thought it better that everyone thought there were no survivors.

  
Cullen gave Izzie time. Finally one night in his arms she choked through tears all she could remember. She remembered her left arm being trapped. Vaguely aware that someone else was in the fire with her, she didn't recognize. One moment she's trying to yank her arm free from the rubble. The next she's outside in the street. Head cradled by someone and some sort of green energy radiating around the stub of her left arm. She promptly passed back out at the sight of her missing arm. She woke up days later in a bed she wasn't sure she recognized but at least a familiar voice. Morrigan sat by her side helping her mother change Izzie's bandages. Quietly shushing her and wiping her tears, as devastation wrecked her.

  
It took alot of persuasion from Morrigan that Izzie would be alright. Reluctantly, Cullen left Izzie for his first tour of duty. He wrote her as often as he could. She would write back, but her words were few. Faline was hired a month later to help Izzie with her new life. Faline re-stitched her clothes so she could dress herself again and pushed Izzie to do something she liked. Find something to keep busy. For her that meant picking up supplies to make medicines, tonics, salves, tinctures, antiseptics and herbs. Izzie's room was filled with every plant she could use. In the next two years after that Flemeth disappeared unexpectedly, leaving Morrigan the sole heir of her fortune. Morrigan was forced into her mother's role as ambassador/liaison for the mining caste of dwarves outside of Orzammar, as well as keeping on eye on the various business's she had invested in.

  
.  
..  
...

They were on the last leg of their journey to Val Royeaux. Four days in the sleeper cabin was much better than the passenger car they had been in previously. Cullen was talking about the sights in Val Royeaux when he noticed Abelas wincing at the light coming in through the window. Cullen got up and closed the curtains. "Thank you," said Abelas.

"You're welcome. I do hope you get that checked out soon." He said, as he pointed at Abelas' injury.

“I'll be alright, can't afford a doctor till I can find a job anyways." He looked down, pained at what he said next. "I sold everything I had to get this far. I'm not sure where to go when we get there."

Cullen saw his chance, "I know exactly where you are going to go first." Authority and confidence in his voice. He got a raised eyebrow from Abelas as he continued. "You are going to go see my friend who calls me a tree. Her name is Izzie. I hope you don't mind but I already told her you would stop by and talk to her about your headaches. You'll like her."

"I don't- have enough coin."- Abelas tried to argue till Cullen cut him off. "You do now." Cullen motioned to Abelas' pocket. He slipped some coin in his jacket pocket while he slept the night before. He had been terrified for a moment that he would wake and think he was trying to rob him, but Cullen thought of what Izzie would do in this situation. _Have courage, and be kind._ She would say. 

  
Abelas didn't know what to say. Cullen continued after a pause. "Can I call you Sam?"

"I suppose." Curious expression on Abelas' face.

"Good, I might be able to get you a job of sorts. Might take some time but that should hold you for a bit." 

"I don't..I don't know what to say...You barely know me" Abelas retorted.  
A smile on Cullens face, "I have a good feeling about you. Let's just say I'm invested in your future. You're good people Sam. Good people should help each other. Wouldn't you agree?"

Cautious but grateful for the gesture Abelas accepted Cullens offer, "Ma' serannas falon". 

Cullen smiled and nodded, "You’re Welcome," Cullen paused to think, squinting his eyes. "Friend." Abelas looked at him funny again. "Falon means friend, right?" Cullen asked. 

"Yes," Abelas answered. A little surprised he knew the phrase. But it was a common one. Perhaps that's all the Elven this shemlen new.

Their train came to it's final stop. Cullen with his duffel bag in hand and Abelas with his hands in his pockets, squinting from the bright sun reflecting off the snow coming in from the window. Abelas' pride wouldn't get in the way of seeking help. Abelas thought, _Cullen hadn't stopped finding every reason to bring her up in conversation. Clearly there was more going on there. If anything I'll go find her purely for curiosity's sake._

The pair exited the train and stood for a moment in the snow covered street as Cullen turns to Abelas, taking in the much taller buildings. "There's an Alienage just a mile out of Val Royeaux. Won't cost you anything to stay there since you're an Elf. Not sure how nice it is but hopefully I can help you out before you get sick of it." Cullen takes out a scrap of paper from his coat pocket and hands it to Abelas. "Here is where you'll find Izzie, and if you ever need to reach me she'll seek me out for you. I hope to see you again Sam." Cullen looked at him, trying to read him, searching for facial cues to see if he could tell if he would truly see this Elf again or not. 

'Sam' took the scrap of paper in his hands and looked at it then to Cullen. Still and serious, he nodded at Cullen, "Dareth Shiral, Cullen"...

.  
..  
...  
....

Cullen waits in the hallway in front of Duke Gaspards office. He's not entirely sure what it's about. He can only guess that it's about how the new lyrium laced rifles are doing in field testing. Cullen doesn't care about the weapons. He'd rather be out defending a village against bandits. There was a settlement that caught fire during the summer, leaving the town destroyed. He would rather be sent there to rebuild homes, help push back any hostile forces, secure the area... Not testing out Gaspards new toys. It's a good guess that this will have to do with the weapon testing anyways since he can hear through the door a familiar voice. _Morrigan.._.No doubt Gaspard will want more Lyrium from the mines when he tells him the new lyrium grenades are functioning. Well mostly. It turns out, too much condensed lyrium can just explode...Cullen hates it.

The door opens...

"Tis not a small request, Grand Duke. T'would be rude to ask for more than what has been given to you." Morrigan snides at the Duke. He folds his arms.

"I imagine your reputation with the dwarves will assist you enough. If not, I'm sure your grace and beauty will. Lady Morrigan..." The Duke shows her out of his office.

"If you'll excuse me, I won't keep Major Rutherford waiting any longer." Morrigan turns to Cullen and gives a subtle smile. 

She turns to face him,"Major Rutherford, Tis' good to make your acquaintance again." She reaches her hand out. He takes it and kisses her hand lightly and gives her a small bow. He knows she's playing the game. Better for her that Gaspard doesn't know anything more about her personal life than he might already know. 

Cullen plays his part as well, "Lady Morrigan, I hear you've been busy with negotiations and observing the mining operations in Orzammar."

She folds her hands in front of herself and tilts her head higher. "Indeed, I'm pleased to be back for a while though." A knowing nod at Cullen, "Enjoy your leave Major." She turns and smiles to herself and walks down the hall of the Grad Duke's Office. 

Gaspard stands at his doorway. Pinching his brow and lets out a heavy sigh. "At least she's easier to deal with than her mother. That witch used to terrify me." Gaspard ushers Cullen in his office and closes the door.

.  
..

Cullen leaves Gaspard's office with a nod, head spinning already. Not the conversation he was expecting at all. He grabs his duffel bag and heads to the street to hail a carriage. It's starting to snow harder than it was when he got off the train. As he expected, Morrigan stands there in the streetlamp light, hood drawn and looking elsewhere. Pretending to ignore him. He stands next to her and lets out a heavy sigh. Pushing hot breath out into the cold. "Is your business concluded then"? She says without facing him. 

  
Cullen replies. "For now it is." He pauses and smiles to himself. "Don't suppose you know anywhere to get a drink around here?" He looks at her teasingly as a carriage pulls up for them. 

  
"I think I might." She says with a smile, finally meeting his eyes.

  
.

  
Cullen lets out another sigh and takes his hat off in the carriage, adjusting the brim and shaking the snow off it when Morrigan speaks, "I'm sorry Cullen." She says with a grimace on her face. 

  
Cullen's eyes dart up to hers. "What for?" 

  
Morrigan pauses and fiddles with the lace on her dress. It's a pretty dress. Violet and green trimmings held together by a black corset to show off her figure. She looks poised but, uncomfortable, and it's not the dress.

  
"I-tried to tell them they didn't need to come. Wasn't even sure how long you'd have on leave this time. I tried to persuade-"

  
Cullen stops her. " Morrigan."

  
"Yes, Cullen?"

  
A heavy defeated sigh from Cullen as he massages his temples with his middle finger and thumb as if he already has a headache." Is it just my Father or my siblings too?"

  
"Your father and brother. Faline is making lamb and roasted vegetables. They will probably be there when we arrive." Morrigan knew his relationship with his father was strained. She knows it has something to do with his leaving his mother and-- something else, but they won't discuss it now. His father is very loud and opinionated. His brother Branson is more pleasant as long as no one gives him a drink, then he can get as loud as his father. At least Branson is more tactful around sensitive topics. No doubt his father will say something--off putting in front of Izzie. He means well she thinks. He's just...obnoxious.

  
Cullen is looking out the carriage lost in thought. He looks solem and far away. "Cullen?"

  
"Morrigan?"

  
"I can stall if you don't want to go straight there?"

  
"Actually I was going to make a stop first anyways..." Cullen looks at Morrigan and starts again. His voice lower and softer. "I know my father is just excited about it being 4 years since I joined. He wants to know if I've chosen a new exciting assignment. But-."

  
Morrigan gives another knowing nod. "That's not what's on your mind....Gaspard?" 

  
Cullen nods and looks down at his hat. "That among other things." Fidgeting with the brim again. Not wanting to discuss it yet, he avoids the question. After a pause and heavy sigh, "How was it? How- was she? This time of year...It's not going to get easier but..."

  
Morrigan interjects "She did better this year, Cullen" She reaches across the carriage and takes his gloved hand in hers. She's not one for much physical contact, but she knows he needs this, "Cullen, she really is doing better. We went and paid our respects 3 weeks ago. They've painted the buildings next to it so you can't see the blast marks anymore..." That may or may not help..But it's the truth and Cullen prefers she be honest with him.

  
A pause.

"That's where I was planning on stopping first... Pay my respects". Cullen said at last. Morrigan nodded and withdrew her hand to whistle at the driver to pull up ahead and let Cullen off. Cullen sat forward and gave Morrigan a quick kiss on the cheek before stepping back out into the cold. It's a short walk from where he was let off, and only two streets away from Morrigan's. 

.

Standing across the street looking at the building that replaced Izzie's family home. It comes back in a flood of memories. What seems like a long time ago, how young and innocent they were...

The time when he first knocked on her door to see if she would go to the sweets shop with him. They were only teenagers then. Izzie was 22 now, Cullen 24. Time flew since then... He remembers her mother had him and his siblings over for Summerday. A holiday mostly only celebrated in Orlais that brought friends and family together for food and festivities. Izzie had asked him to dance with her, the record player in her father's study playing a classical number. It was the first time he realized how stunning she looked in a dress. He remembers it took a while for her father to like him until he asked if he could take Izzie fishing. They were just friends. But her parents knew better...Everyone did. He misses playing with her siblings and how he used to wrestle her little brother Ben along with his own brother Branson. He'd watch Izzie's sisters Ava and Lilah play with her hair and put Baby's Breath flowers in her hair. How beautiful she'd look trying to get the stray flowers out later. Finally he thought about that last kiss before he went to basic training. When the world stood still and nothing outside of those doorsteps existed but them. They had just started to explore their feelings for each other. Her hair was down, blowing softly in the wind, her hands were gripping his collar, pulling him down to meet her lips. His hands at her hips as he slipped the Silver coin in her pocket as she kissed him. A smirk in the corner of his mouth, knowing she'd find it later. She made him feel like he could accomplish anything. She had utter faith in him that he would be ok. Never worried about the dangers he could face...Her tall Oak tree...

.

The new building in front of him made him shake his head. "Damned bail bonds office...Really?" He let out a labored breath and watched it dissipate in the cold air. He stands there in the silence a while and recites a prayer....

_"From the fade the Maker created,_   
_The precious our beloved,_   
_and to the fade you will return._   
_In dreams we will remember,_   
_Maker keep us til you call us home."_

.

Cullen stood there a little while longer, letting the flurries of snow accumulate on his shoulders, noting the buildings on either side Morrigan mentioned. As if what happened was simply erased. _In dreams we will remember. We will always remember._ He thinks to himself. 

  
He takes one more look, before he turns and heads to Morrigan's. There was a warm fireplace, warm food, and warmer Scotch he knew Faline had hidden in the pantry for him. It had been 4 years since he joined the army, 4 years since Izzie's family was taken from them, 4 years wondering where that left them. 

  
His pace starts to pick up knowing she'd be wondering where he was. _Better save her from my father and his loud mouth._ Her letters were always warm, but no matter how much he tried to convey his feelings for her again, he felt like she was still distant. Like she kept him at arm's length. Maybe that was just the nature of the physical distance. He wondered if 4 years was enough time. Or did he miss his chance?

  
That was one thing he wanted to talk to her about. Among other things. He looked forward to finally catching up with her. Had it really been 9 months since he'd seen her last? Some different opportunities were presenting themselves as far as his military career was concerned. One of them would let him be closer to her. But what Gaspard talked to him about...Well he wanted her opinion first. It was going to be a difficult conversation whether she still had feelings for him or not...

  
He approached the house and paused to look through the windows. In the big one to the right he could see his father standing by the fireplace talking to Branson on the sofa, drinks already in hand. He shook his head. Morrigan was seated at the other chair next to the fireplace, teacup in hand, politely listening to his father ramble probably. The smaller window to the left was the kitchen. He saw Faline busy in the kitchen, taking her signature Rosemary bread out of the oven...No Izzie. Probably upstairs avoiding his father and brother for a moment. He headed up the front steps, heart hammering in his chest, and knocked on the door....  
.  
..  
...


	4. The Reunion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen comes home to reunite with Izzie. Cullen's father and brother stay for dinner. Fluff in this chapter!! Yay Fluff and Feels!!!<3

Cullen had knocked a few times but his father was so loud behind the door, no one probably heard him. He waited a bit till he heard the lock and the door knob jiggle. A wall of warm, delicious air hit him instantly. _Home.._. Faline was standing there smiling brightly. From behind her was his father's voice booming from across the room. "Hey! There's my son! " His father quickly reached Cullen standing at the door and hugged him hard, nearly pushing Faline out of the way, making Cullen drop his bag on the ground. 

Branson casually approached giving his brother a handshake. Faline picked up Cullen's bag and took it to the bottom of the stairs before heading back to Cullen for a hug. Cullen leaned down and wrapped his arms around Faline who whispered to him, "I'm sure Izzie will be down shortly, sit down, I'll get your Scotch." She squeezed his arm as she left for the kitchen.

Cullen took a seat on the end of the sofa facing the fireplace. Morrigan smiled at him lightly as she drank her tea. Cullen was surprised she wasn't drinking something stronger. His father didn't miss a beat, claiming his spot by the fireplace. "So, 'Major' how was your trip? Did you go first class? How was the food? I hope the army has been feeding you as well? What does Orlais feed their soldiers anyway?..." 

"Trip was fine. No first class, but I got the sleeper cabin. Stopped at that deli I love at Val Fermin Station." Cullen rattled off the answers to the 'small talk' his father started. Hoping dinner would be ready soon. Branson sat on the other end of the sofa with his drink, swirling the glass. Faline probably gave them the cheaper stuff. They wouldn't notice, or care for that matter. At that thought, Faline came over with Cullen's special Scotch she kept just for his visits. The one thing Orlais wasn't as good at, Ferelden Scotch was his favorite. Faline always made sure they had a bottle. 

His father started again, "Mia sends her regards and says you need to write her more. Rosalie says 'Hi'. Your brother and I have been doing good work with that fellow from Redcliffe. The one with the horses?" 

"Dennet?" Cullen responds, taking a healthy swig of his Scotch. The warmth in his chest made him relax a little.

"Yes, that one. Said he might get us a contact who also needs leather work done in Denerim." Cullen's father and brother had a leatherworking business. They raised Bronto and Druffalo for their hides and either sold them in bulk or Branson made saddles for riding. Hence their relationship with Horsemaster Dennet. Branson was good with his hands. Took his time to make sure they were long lasting quality. 

Cullen turns to Branson, "I hope father isn't putting too much on your plate, with more orders. I've seen your work, they are beautiful."

Branson replies," It's not too bad, I just remind him that this is my craft, its like art. Can't rush it. Higher quality means better durability."   
Cullen's father snorted, shuffled in his spot by the mantle at the fireplace. " You just remember, I can hire someone to help you if you can't handle it. That fellow with the holes in all his sweaters that hangs out near the stables looks like he needs someone to put him to work."

Branson looks perturbed by that, a scowl on his face " I _already_ asked you to hire him remember?"

Cullen looks from his brother to his father. His father rolls his eyes and throws back the rest of his Whiskey, setting it on the mantle, clearing his throat, "I don't remember that. Why wouldn't I hire him if you already asked me?"

"Really? We fought about it for an hour." Branson with his eyes like he was burning holes in his father's head. The conversation suddenly tense. Cullen sensed this was his cue to see if Faline needed help in the kitchen and get more Scotch. Cullen studied his father's face for a moment before he got up. 

"Ahh," An awkward pause, "I remember now...." His father had a mixture of shame and anger on his face. His fingers tapping on the mantle staring back at his Son. _Please don't say it, I swear to the maker.._.Cullen got up not wanting to hear the response. Halfway to the kitchen he heard it anyways. It stopped him in his tracks. "You can't trust all of them Branson...."

.

Cullen made it to the kitchen without turning back and starting a fight. _Why in Andaste's name do you **have** to talk like that, In **this** house of all places..._ He steps into the kitchen and Faline turns around, "Dinner's ready. I’m going to set the table. Unless you just want to sit in the living room Cullen?" 

"Living room is fine, Faline." Cullen smiles as he heads to the pantry for more Scotch. Faline starts taking plates of food to their guests and asking if anyone needs refills. _At least Faline wasn't within earshot._ Cullen refills his glass and closes the pantry door, pausing at the light gust of air he felt. He stands still. It takes him only a sec, as a smile slowly grows and spreads across his face...

She's very quick, always quiet. But the thing that always lets him know she's close. The only tell. The distinct smell of Elfroot and Lavender. He stands there smiling to himself in front of the pantry door he just closed, Scotch in one hand, his other reaching for his pocket. He fumbles in his pocket and feels for the foreign object he knows she snuck in there. He pulls out the coin and looks down at it. Barely turning to the side he knows she is on. He hears her sweet playful voice behind him as he turns to face her.

"Don't lose it." She says with a teasing tone and hint of sass. Her face cocked to the side, pleased with herself grin, getting bigger as he faces her. She's wearing a long sleeve, white blouse with billowing sleeves tucked into a dark green, floor length flowy skirt. Her hair is in a low bun with strands of her wavy hair framing her face. He barely steps forward. She was right behind him. Her forehead almost under his chin, he leans down to whisper in her ear. 

"I wouldn't dream of it." His lips just shy of grazing her ear, making heat rise to her cheeks immediately. She takes his glass from his hand, a little impatiently, setting it on the kitchen table behind her. Cullen's hands find her waist, pulling her against him firmly, giving her a tight squeeze. He holds her there nuzzling his face into her neck, breathing her in, feeling her wavy hair brush against his stubbly face. Her right arm sliding up his to squeeze his shoulder. He closes his eyes. _Now I'm home...._

Her back is a bit arched as she has to get a little on her toes for him, even as he bends down. _Has he gotten taller? Or have I always been this short?_ She thinks to herself. She feels him relax at her touch, until she hears his father's booming voice. Cullen sighs defeatedly into her neck. Izzie chuckles and leans back, looking Cullen in his warm brown eyes. "Don't worry, they aren't staying here. Branson wanted to stay in one of the hotels in the city. _‘The Ritz’._ I guess there's a billiards room on the third floor he wanted to use. " 

Cullen smiles at her and shakes his head. "Thank the Maker." He releases her and she hands him his drink back. She takes a moment to get a better look at him, admiring how well the navy blue uniform looks on him. Still takes her breath away at how his shoulders have filled out in the years he's been in the Army. She wonders how long she was staring at him when Faline comes back into the kitchen and gives them their plates of food. 

Izzie sits in the middle of the sofa between Cullen and Branson, thankful for the food Faline made, that has forced Cullen's father to sit down and take bites between his non stop talking. Izzie doesn't mind the man...In _small_ doses. The last time she saw him, it was to celebrate Cullen's one year anniversary in the army. That time they had just taken Cullen out to a pub. They had invited Izzie and Morrigan, but they opted to stay home. Cullen's father came back so drunk and loud until he finally passed out in the guest bedroom. Izzie smiled as Faline brought her a glass of white wine. _At least only Cullen is staying the night._

.  
..

"So what interesting opportunities do you have lined up? I understand they'll give you a week to decide what you want to do from here. " Cullen's father chimed in after Faline took everyone's plates.

Cullen cleared his throat, looking at his empty glass on the coffee table. "I'm not sure what I'm at liberty to say. There's some--moving pieces in play. I'll have a better idea by the end of the week." Izzie sensed something odd in what he said. She got up and grabbed his glass to refill it. She glided into the kitchen past Faline standing in the doorway. Tea in her hands, smiling warmly at Izzie with a wink.

She returned with his Scotch , placing it in his hand from behind the sofa. His father had finally decided to turn his attention to Morrigan to pick her brain about politics. As she handed Cullen his drink, he reached up and grabbed her forearm with his other hand, gently pulling her towards him. 

Softly, only for her ears, "If you keep refilling that, you are going to have to carry me to my room later." 

His touch makes her heart flutter, " I- just--saw your drink was empty...Again." 

He looks up at her and smiles pulling her a little closer, his hand sliding down to lace his fingers in hers. "Thank you Izzie." He smiles as he lifts her hand to his lips, giving her knuckles a tender kiss. His eyes staring directly into hers. The fire in front of him highlighting his chiseled jawline. Her stomach was doing flips.

Every time he came back they had to figure out where each other was at. Did he still have feelings? Or were they just close friends, playfully teasing like old times? She knew she was partially to blame for that though. She had been reluctant to push their relationship. She would pull back when things got too intense...But then so did he sometimes. His time on leave was never enough time to truly talk about it. _Be bold this time_. She tried telling herself. In one of his last letters he'd mentioned that it was possible that he could be stationed closer to Val Royeaux. That maybe she could at least see him more often...

His eyes were still focused on hers. He was still holding her hand. She made the mistake of glancing at his lips and back into his eyes, making him barely tighten his grip on her hand. _Shit he saw that_. She smiled at him and shook her head gently, a twinkle in her eyes before releasing her hand from his upwards to glide her smooth hand across his cheek before walking back to the kitchen. 

.  
..

Faline had gone to bed early, exhausted from all the activity. Morrigan was in the kitchen with Izzie washing dishes as Cullen was saying goodnight to his Father and brother at the door. "Have fun at the billiards Branson." He said as he waved at them. 

His father yelled from the bottom of the steps. " Tomorrow night, after you rest up. Drinks! Love you Son!" He was swaying from all the cheap whiskey Faline gave him. Branson guided him with his hand to stay on the sidewalk. 

Cullen gave them another wave and closed the door, resting both hands on the out in front of him. A deep breath and sigh of relief as he pushed himself off the door. Cullen made his way into the kitchen as Morrigan turned to hear him enter. "Good, they're gone. I can take this damn dress off now. No offense Cullen." 

He smiles knowingly at her. " None taken."

Izzie wipes her hand on a towel hanging off the towel rack and turns to see Cullen standing in front of the table casually leaning forward from it with his hands behind him on the edge. He's smiling softly with his head tilted to the side, but when she steps closer to him he stands straighter, his gaze drops with his hands. She steps close to him and slides her hand around his waist and leans her head on his chest. He wraps his arms around her shoulders in silence, tucking his head into her neck again. He wants to talk. To catch up. Tell her about the choices he has to make soon. Talk about everything this time. Not yet...

She's leaning on him with almost her full weight. She can feel his chest rise and fall. Hear his heartbeat. Smell that distinct Cullen smell mixed with Elderflower. A natural cologne she gave him, pretty sure he only wears it for her.

It's getting late but she thinks she could just stand here all night in his large, all consuming arms. His breath on her neck soothing, making her grip around his waist fall a little. Relaxed and content. He's still wearing his uniform, but at least he took his jacket off. The fire made the living room almost too hot. Or was that because she was sitting so close to him their thighs were almost touching?  
Cullen broke the silence after several minutes, still holding her like he wasn't letting go anytime soon. "Did 'Sam' come by?" 

She chuckles into his chest. "Yes." Her voice muffled.   
Cullen shifts his stance, not letting go but leans back to look at her. Her blue eyes looking back at him. "My father didn't say anything too stupid when I wasn't present did he?"

A little eye roll with a smirk as she shakes her head " No, he behaved himself." A pause as Cullen dips his head back into the crook of her neck. Izzie continues, "We will see if tomorrow morning he asks me if I can cure his hangover....Again."   
Cullen lets out a huff, and shakes his head. After a moment, "Sofa?"  
Izzie lets him go, "Yes."

.

She's grabbed a blanket and a glass of wine as they sit on the sofa in front of the dying fire. His arm around her shoulder, her head leaning a little towards him. She never knows how to start catching up with him. Her life doesn't feel as exciting as his. Finally she starts...

"I missed you." She says softly.

"I missed you too." Cullen responds as he rubs his thumb over the top of her shoulder, gently squeezing her.

"Branson looks so much older this time"...she pauses. There's a hint of sadness in her voice. Cullen already knows why. Her brother Ben and him were close in age. Seeing Branson grow up reminds her of what could have been. This time of year is always hard on them. Can't help it. This night may end in tears, but he knows she needs him for this. His siblings were like her siblings too. 

"Mia sent me a letter." Cullen recalls, "Said Roasalie wants to come visit you. Now that she's old enough to ride the train by herself." He closes his eyes and turns his head to kiss her temple, his chest feeling heavy. He's never sure if she needs to talk or she wants him to. Sometimes it's just silence.

"I’d like that." Izzie nods and takes a sip of wine. Her tone sounding a little farther away. _Nothing too heavy Izzie, he just got back._ She scolds herself. She just wants to let the world melt away tonight. He's home. Sitting on the sofa. _Safe..._

Cullen hopes he read her well enough to change the subject, "So, you were able to help Sam?"

She smiles a little and lets out a small huff of a laugh. "Yes, and his name is _not_ Sam. Something tells me that's an inside joke of some kind." She says as she nudges him with her shoulder. He returns her laugh, " Yes."  
She pauses, "His headaches should be better now. If they even return." 

Cullen knows what that means. "He wasn't bothered by your magic, I take it?" 

She nods, "No, not at all, I thought he might flinch at least a little but he didn't. Closed his eyes and everything. He looked like he was in a lot of pain." She plays with the stem of her wine glass and takes a sip. She almost forgot she was holding it.

"On the train he gave me the impression that he came from a tribe or something. Said he'd only been around other Elves his whole life. I assumed that meant he'd seen magic before. I know that's the stereotype, but I'm guessing I'm not wrong."

She smirked and nodded as she drank the rest of her wine and put the glass on the coffee table. "I think you're right. In fact it was my suspicion that he might even be a magic user himself."

He was looking at her lovingly, as she stared at the fire in front of her. He loved that she could help people with just a touch. Her touch. Always soothing, always gentle. She could have been angry her whole life after what happened, but her mother had implanted words that would never leave her. She clung to them. Her mantra that rubbed off on him. Her thing that kept her grounded. _"Have courage, and be kind."_ Her father liked to tell her his version though. Slightly different but still true. _"It's chaos, this world,_ " He'd say with a grumble, _"All we can do to help, is be kind."_

He looked at her a little longer and nuzzled his head against hers. The smell of lavender and Elfroot in her hair. If he was lucky, he'd get a couple weeks with her. He had seen her pause and look at his lips earlier. She didn't pull away from him at all this evening. The fire was going out and she pulled the blanket that was over their lap up higher, snuggling closer to him...  
He usually waited to the end of his leave to figure out if she was seeing someone or if she still had feelings. Usually gave her a kiss before he left. To his knowledge, he was the only one in her life. Why was this so terrifying? He was _home._ She was _safe_ and warm in his arms. He could just tilt her chin up and...

"Cullen?" She brought him out of his thoughts. "It's getting late. I'm sure you want to go to bed. You've had a very long trip." 

"Yes," He replied, "Real bed sounds nice."

.

He walked up the stairs with her, looking down the long hallway. Faline's room and then his on the left. Izzie's and Morrigans on the right. At the end of the hall was Flemeth's old room that Morrigan had slowly started to turn into a study/library. They paused at her door as he peered inside, looking at her desk with all her beakers and assorted glass bottles and jars. At least 10 small bundles of Elfroot, hanging upside down from the curtain rod attached with twine. "That's a lot of Elfroot." He said with his eyebrows raised, amusement on his face. 

"Yeah," She answered, "Cole brought me some. You know, cold and flu season." She said with a shrug.

She looked up at him, sleepiness in her eyes. "Goodnight Cullen." Her eyes caught his, wandering, searching her face. Her back was not quite touching the hallway wall behind her until he stepped closer, his hands on her shoulders squeezing as they made their way up her neck. Gently he held her face in his hands, his thumbs slowly smoothing over the outline of her jaw. He had a hint of a smile. Hoping she returned his...

She did. It was small, but it was all he needed.   
He leaned down as she closed her eyes, their lips touching, gentle at first, her face flushed. His arm found her waist again and pulled her closer. His full lips firm as he slated his mouth against hers. She felt whole as she let her body go limp. One hand cupped her cheek, then slid to the nape of her neck, pulling her in deeper, stepping so close her back was firmly pressed against the wall now. She let out a small gasp as he let her up for air, diving back in at another angle. His pace picking up. She gripped the bottom of his shirt at the seam. _This_ was what she had been aching for. She'd tell him this time. She could be brave...

Both his hands found themselves tangled in her hair now, tilting her head back. He pulled back to search her face a moment. If she wanted him to stop, now was the time. He looked her in the eyes, and waited. He'd wait as long as she needed...

She gave a shy smile at first, then a smirk in the corner of her mouth he couldn't mistake. She took her hand and pulled him by his neck down to her. Taking his bottom lip in hers. She sucked it gently, teasingly. His breath sped up. He looped his arm around her waist again, this time more assertive. The other lost in the waves of her hair that he pulled gently. She hated that she only had one hand. Thankful he had pulled her so close, like there was no escape. _Good_ , she thought. His strong arms around her made her feel secure. Lost in the moment, like there was no one and nothing else in this house but them. 

Neither one of them knew how long they had been like that in each others arms. Izzie pulled back a little to softly rub her nose against his with a smile. Her hand gently playing with the blonde curls at the nape of his neck. Low and breathy, he broke the silence, "Goodnight Izzie." 

His voice made her heart beat so loudly in her chest she could swear he should be able to hear it too. "Goodnight Cullen."

Cullen gave her a smile, kissed her forehead gently, before turning and heading to his room.

 _I'll tell him later..._.She thought, as she collected herself and closed her bedroom door behind her. She has time. Opportunities. Breakfast in the morning with his father and brother, then showing them the city. Would he hold her hand in front of everyone? There had been something troubling on his mind, she knew it. Could always tell. He'd come to her in time.

She felt a draft from the window again. _Dammit, forgot to remind Morrigan to get that fixed. Maybe Cullen can fix the latch..._

  
.  
..  
...


	5. The Wolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solas is encased in stone and having trouble 'waking up'. Overslept by an extra millennia. Izzie's parents are introduced and the events of the tragedy are revealed.

_Wake up..._  
The agents he had on standby that were supposed to wake him, must have been killed. He thought he was dead. The power it took to create the veil nearly killed him. He's been in a deep sleep for a very long time. Longer than he should have been. _How long have I overslept?_ He wonders. 

He can't see. Not with his eyes anyways. The fade _ **is**_ his eyes. He's been able to see where he is. In a manner of speaking. He's deep underground, encased in a tomb, made from his own destruction. Buried under rocks and rubble, covering up an ancient civilization. It's very dark, wherever he is. He feels...Stiff. He's still alive but he can't feel his chest rise and fall. He really had assumed he was dead until he looked for himself in the fade again and noticed a light coming from...Well above. It's just a sliver of light. It waxes and wanes. He can try to calculate time again...

It dawns on him one day... _Week? Year?_ No telling as to how much time has passed, he can't see past this tomb. The veil must have strengthened over time. Difficult to access the rest of the world. He can traverse his own memories, but that is the extent of his magic. He hates it. He has always been able to count on his dreams to keep him company, or explore, but now his access to the fade is difficult. Cut off. If only he could access his Orb.

.  
..  
...

 _Wait..There...is that more light coming in?_ Solas taps into the fade as quickly as he can. His strength and reserve nearly coming to an end...His end. His spirit finds the room he is in. The place where he held the sky back. _There! There's more light coming in. Wait...Who's this?_ His spirit is standing in the middle of the tomb when he hears crumbling coming from above.

"Ahhh!" _Thud!_

The ceiling came crashing down, and with it a dark haired Elf in odd clothing. He gets up and looks around, his hands on his knees as he pats and wipes the dirt and dust off his clothes. Solas watches the scene play out in front of him. Not able to interact...

~

Mordin dusts himself off and checks to make sure he didn't break anything. Nope. Probably the only thing bruised bad enough is his ego. He can hear her already. 

"Mordin?" A female voice calls, "Mordin? Where did you go?" Louder and closer, "Mordin?"

"I’m down here Milah!" He shouts at the large opening in the ceiling, letting a magnificent ray of sunlight in. 

Some more rubble falls off the corners of the hole above him, as the female voice sounds close. "Mordin? How in the Void did you get down there?"

The brown haired Elf looks around and then back up towards her, "I fell through!" After a beat, "Milah, this is incredible." The Elf staggers around the rocks and rubble, careful not to trip on the uneven terrain.

From above, "Hang on, let me go get the rope from the pack. Might have to tie both of them together to get you out of there." She pauses and looks around, kneeling at the edge. "I think I see a tree I can tie off from. I'll be back."

"I hope so", says the Elf, hands on his hips looking up.

Her voice sounds farther away, "I won't leave you there to die, ma'lath."

The Elf stands there and smiles to himself as he shakes his head. He reaches in his pocket and lights a match. The flame goes out soon after it's lit, but it was enough for Mordin to look in his direction. In the corner of the room is a stone statue, encased in golden armour. The remnants of a wolf pelt over the shoulder and an odd amulet hanging from its neck. Mordin steps up to the statue, lighting another match near the statue's face. For just a moment, he could have sworn he heard breathing. " _Not today Falon'din_ " Mordin shrugs off a shiver traveling up his spine as he looks the stone statue over. It's clearly an Elf but this one looks more...Life-like. He notices the statue is half buried, save for the statue's hand. He thinks it's just a rock as he goes to touch it. 

Milah's voice is heard from above, "Mordin? Mordin I'm tying the rope off. Where are you?"

Mordin gingerly touches the statue and what looks like a stone sphere in its grasp, "Yeah hang on a minute, there's something here." Mordin reaches in his pocket for one last match and lights it, illuminating the ancient Elven writing on the sphere. His eyes go wide as he reaches out to it again. There's a faint vibration coming from it, but then it stops. The match goes out as the sphere falls out of the stone Elf's hand. Mordin scrambles to catch it as the voice from above calls out to him. "Mordin! Are you ok?"

Mysterious sphere in his hand, Mordin slowly backed away from the stone Elf. "Coming Milah"

.  
..  
~

Solas watched the Elf climb up the rope with his Orb in hand. _That fool has no idea what he is in possession of. It should have destroyed him. Anyone with any magical ability could set it off. Unless...No..No, no, no,no,no..._  
.  
..  
...  
....

He fell asleep again. No idea how long again. But this time he could open his eyes and see the light coming through the hole in the ceiling. _Wait...My eyes!_ He blinked. For the first time in 2 millenia, he actually blinked!

Suddenly he felt an odd force from within himself. Hope. It was just a glimmer, and it was all he needed. He dug deep and called forth whatever he could summon...

 _Pooft!_ A vibration followed by an echo that reverbeated against the walls of his tomb, causing more rubble to fall inwards. The prison that had kept him immobile for...He didn't know how long. He fell forward on his knees, coughing and gasping for air. Forcing himself to breathe. It hurt. The expanse of his lungs was shallow. _How have I stayed alive this long?_ He tried to summon his magic again. Too weak. As he looked around and got his bearings, he noticed new vegetation climbing in and around the hole in the ceiling. How long? It was impossible to know at the moment. He took a moment to learn to breathe again, as he looked around. The hole in the ceiling had caved in enough rubble from the shockwave he summoned to allow him to crawl out. _Freedom...Hope at last...._  
.  
..  
...  
....

It took Solas a year to find the faint magic of the Orb in the fade. Twenty-five years had passed since the brown haired Elf took his Orb. He finally found it in the fade, sitting on a shelf in what looked like someone's study. The fade distorted to show him another Elf. Not the man who had stolen the orb in his sleep, but a daughter he presumed. She had a strong magical thread in her bloodline. He could feel it, usually passes through the mother. Her mother must be fluent in magic as well he thought. 

The more he would visit the family in the fade to see their life, the more clues he had to figure out where they lived, where he could find his Orb. The father was an ex-adventurer and aspiring inventor. The mother was an herbalist..No, she was more..Solas discovered she had earth elemental magic. That explained her obsession with plants. She could take a seed, plant it, and immediately make it grow to its full potential. 

He found the moment Izzie discovered her magic. Her mother Milah had dropped a beaker. It fell to the ground and shattered. As her mother went to clean it up, she cut herself. The daughter saw the blood and rushed over to her mother to stop the bleeding...

And she did... sealed the wound up with a gesture...and right then he **knew.**..The whole world _**could**_ change. Not sure if she was just sensitive to magic because of her mother's bloodline or if she could get stronger with her close proximity to the Orb...He eventually found the Lavellan household in Orlais.

But it was too late... One evening Izzie's father was telling her about the Orb he found on a research trip while he was courting her mother. The daughter held it in her hand to inspect it and- something clicked. It fused with her hand, and ignited like a bomb in the house. By the time Solas got there she was screaming in agony as her family's house was up in flames. Her hand glowing and burning green with energy. She was trapped under a beam in the house and couldn't get out. He found her. Seeing that the Orb was killing her, he disintegrated her arm. The Orb destroyed with it. 

In that moment he let his feelings for this young Elf cloud his judgment. He should have let her die and claim the Orb for himself. But he couldn't do it. _**This**_ world could never be ready for the veil to drop. The length that the veil had been up only strengthened it. Made access to magic and the fade nearly impossible unless you had a strong bloodline. She was unique in this world. She wasn't afraid of magic like so many others he had seen. Her mother encouraged it, even though she hid her own magic ability from her. He had seen her compassion for others, her kindness, her strength of character, her thirst for knowledge. Had she been born in his time, she would have had all she needed to thrive. Maybe she still could in this new world...

In his weakness he saved her, and let die his hope of dropping the veil....He drug her from the explosion that killed her family. He would grieve for them, and for her, grieve for his failure, grieve that the whole world was cut off from the fade and any hope of using magic like he once could.

He may never be able to save this world, but at least he could save her. He held her in the middle of the street and did what he could to seal her wounds. His healing magic was still not very strong, terribly unreliable. _What magic he could have had wielded again he thought......_.She opened her eyes for just a moment to look up at him, before looking down at what was left of her left arm and passed back out. Tears streaked her face. Her whole left side exposed and burnt. He held her there, helpless as bells went off, signaling that there was a fire. 

With the girl still in his arms he looked around and saw someone standing amongst the smoke and fire. An older human woman with white hair. Something familiar about her...Something about her said to trust her. He got up and carried Izzie to her. She nodded, took the girl in her arms and turned away...   
Exhausted and newly aware of what it would look like if an Elf was seen using magic near an explosion, he disappeared into the night. Four years he kept his distance and waited to see if she would become more powerful. The human woman who took her in wanted her to hide her gifts. She cared for the girl, but not enough to set her free he thought. To him, this girl was _hope._ Hope that others could grow and come into their own magic. Maybe through her, she was now the key. Maybe some of the power of the Orb remained, in her, untapped potential. He kept his distance, and waited.....

Curiosity and impatience got the best of him. He couldn't wait to see if she would change the world on her own anymore. He had to know. _Maybe she just needed a push..._

So he would need someone to push him...He waited till she was in view. Noticed a human with her. One he had seen before, blonde curly hair and his arm around her waist.... He had other ways, other chances to insert himself into her life, but this one would give him the angle he wanted. See the extent of her magic.

He walked up to a group of drunken humans standing outside a bar and shoved them. Using a little bit of force from within, they retaliated....and Solas smirked as the first shemlen thug punched him in the gut. He was doubled over in pain. He had let drop his barrier and had no healing ability anymore. _A few more hits._ He thought.

As he looked up through his blurred vision, he saw the blonde human and the beautiful brown haired woman he'd come to know as "Izzie" come over to take the men off him. He smiled to himself as he blacked out....  
.  
..  
...


	6. Opportunities

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Morrigan and Izzie chat. Cullen talks to Izzie about new opportunities. Solas is rescued by Izzie and Cullen.

Izzie was already wrapped up in her favorite velvet coat, early the next morning, putting together medicines . She was already on the second cup of coffee before anyone else was up. The process of extracting oil from the Elfroot plants was tedious but she had to be patient to get as much as she could. She wanted to make sure she was using the Royal Elfroot as efficiently as possible. Izzie found her mother's encyclopedia of known herbs and had begun studying it, hoping to find additional information on this different variant of Elfroot. She propped the book up carefully on the music stand Morrigan procured for her a few years ago and fastened the book with the metal clasps that came with it. It was a genius solution to holding books open for her. 

The second time Cullen had come back from leave, Izzie was sitting in her bed frustrated that she kept losing her page, holding her book with one hand propped up against her thighs. She had dropped the book and wanted to scream at it. She got off her bed and picked the book up in anger and threw it across the room at her bedroom door. Her shock and humiliation when she saw Cullen standing there at the door. The book nearly missed him. "Cullen-I-I didn't see you-I didn't mean to...Forgive me." She had wanted to fall to the floor and tell him to leave. Instead he picked up the book and took her downstairs by the fire.

Without saying a word he sat on the couch sideways, legs spread out in front of himself and had her sit between his thighs. Her back to his chest, he held the book for her to read as she turned the pages. "Don't apologize, Izzie." He said. So much care and tenderness from him. It would overwhelm her at times. 

She went through periods of time where all she was, was angry. "Stages of grief." Morrigan said to her later. It was normal to feel like this. Normal...She did find a new normal though. Just took time...And patience. Something she didn't have a lot of, but she was getting better. Things would never be the way they were, but she still had people around her that loved and cared about her. 

  
Izzie concentrated on working on her Elfroot till she heard a lighter tap at the door. "Izzie? Can I come in?" Hearing Morrigan's quiet, groggy voice through the door, Izzie got up and let her in. Morrigan had her usual burgundy nightdress on under her fluffy black robe tied in the middle. Her black hair in it's usual messy bun. "Thank you for getting up early and making coffee, Izzie." She yawned as she followed her back to her desk, setting her own cup down next to the mortar and pestle. "Need help?"

"Of course," Izzie said with a smile. "Here, I've taken what oil I can out of the leaves. You can grind it up with a little bit of water." Morrigan took her place next to Izzie and helped her. They worked together in silence for a while. 

A half hour or so had passed and Morrigan had helped Izzie finish what she wanted to get done that morning. "Thank you sis, this is much easier with another set of hands." 

Morrigan sits on the edge of Izzie's bed and sips her coffee. "You're welcome." 

Izzie puts her vials down after closing the lid on the last one and sits back in her desk chair. "So, how was Orzzamar?" 

Morrigan responds curtly,"Good, nothing new to report. Everything fine while I was gone?" 

"Yeah, sold some medicines, healed that man 'Sam' Cullen sent my way, nothing terribly interesting."

"You healed him? Not just set him up with a salve and told him to leave?" Morrigan shot her a disappointed look, laced with a scowl.

  
Izzie huffed and explained, "He's an Elf, he was clearly in pain, and Cullen said I'd like him."

  
Morrigan rolled her eyes in defeat, "I suppose Cullen wouldn't have sent him your way if he was worried about him. Do you think he'll be a repeat customer?"

Izzie was looking at the bottom of her coffee cup in her hand noting it was empty, "It's possible." 

"Well that's good, as long as he doesn't go blabbering to the whole city that he knows a magic user." 

Morrigan gulps down the rest of her coffee when they both pause to hear the footsteps and Cullen's voice in the hallway. "Faline? Have you seen Morrigan?" 

"If she's not in the study, check Izzie's room." They hear Faline say behind the door.   
Morrigan huffs and rests her hand on her forehead as she mumbles "I'm going to fire her for that..."

Izzie chuckles, "You're going to fire her? For telling Cullen where you are?"

"Yes."

Izzie laughs a little louder and gives Morrigan a smirk, "Why are you avoiding Cullen?"  
Morrigan flashes her a look, keeping her eyes level with Izzie's, "What does he want to do, first thing in the morning when he stays here?"

Izzie smiles and shakes her head knowingly and answers, "Chess."

Morrigan nods and sighs, "Tis' too early for chess."

.  
..  
...

Izzie, Morrigan and Cullen went to “ _The Ritz"_ hotel his father and Branson stayed at and collected them to explore the city and show how it had changed since last they were there. They perused the shops after breakfast, stopping at a local brewery where Cullen's father insisted on doing a tasting.

As their trip came to a close Branson offered to take everyone out for drinks. Normally Cullen would give in and let his family take him out but he fought it this time. Something had been bothering him and he hadn't told Izzie yet. _He'll come to me when he's ready_ , Izzie reminded herself.

Morrigan sent Branson and his father in the direction of a good pub and bid them goodbye, Morrigan leaving to do her own shopping. Cullen took Izzie aside when they had parted and let out a sigh of relief. No snow at the moment but the wind was picking up. Izzie had worn a dress to go out, paired with a violet long coat with big bell sleeves. Normally when she went out in public she made a point to look as un-noticeable as possible. She still hid her ears in a hat, but it was a nicer hat. One Morrigan had picked out for her. Wide brim and beaded embellishments on it. She felt far more girly than she'd normally like to be. 

Finally alone again Izzie stood in front of Cullen on the sidewalk in front of a pawn shop. Cullen had on a dark grey heavy winter coat lined with sheepskin. He was looking out in the distance when she brought him out of his thoughts. "Cullen? What is it?"  
He looked down and gave her a small smile but it was laced with hesitation. His hands were in his pockets till he reached for her hand, "Come with me?"   
Izzie couldn't say no to those big brown eyes. "Sure."

.

He led her towards the Guard Captain's station. The station was farther away from home and Izzie rarely traveled this far on foot. When they got to the building Izzie stopped Cullen a moment, "Why here?"

Cullen's demeanor had changed a little, there was a more sincere smile on his face. "Not that far a walk is it?"

"No," Izzie responded, "But why take me here?"

"You'll see."

He took her into the building. As they passed a couple of the city's Watchmen they tipped their hats to Cullen as he walked by, apparently recognizing him. Cullen had her by the hand as they turned a corner and headed for Commander Meredith's office. Izzie stopped Cullen again. "Cullen?" She whispered, "Cullen I've heard things about Meredith, she doesn't like Elves, or...People like me." 

"She's not here Izzie." Cullen paused at the door, took out a key and opened the door, pushing Izzie through in front of him, and turning on the light. Izzie stood in Mededith's office and looked around. It was....Empty.

She heard Cullen close the door behind them. "Cullen?"

He paused a moment and walked over to the empty desk in the middle of the room. Opened empty file cabinets and bits of scrap paper were scattered on the ground around their feet. Cullen moved to sit on the edge of the desk and watched Izzie look around the room before he spoke. A heavy exhale, “Commander Meredith was forced to resign last week." 

That caught Izzie's attention. "Forced to resign? Why? Gaspard loves that awful woman."

A chuckle from Cullen then a more serious tone, “I don't know why she was forced to resign. Gaspard wouldn't tell me. Not my business anyways. The important part is he- asked me if I'd like to replace her?" 

Izzie was confused, "But this is local law enforcement, not the Army?"

"I know." Cullen replied, "But my 4 years I signed up for are over unless I want to re-sign for another year. "

"You were thinking of leaving?" Izzie was surprised, her eyebrows raised. He loved the military. 

"It's been on my mind as of recently, I hadn't thought about what I'd do if I left until Gaspard offered me this. There are still considerations to be made and I'm not the only one this job has been offered too. In fact this isn't my only option I’m considering but I wanted your opinion." 

Izzie took a step closer to him and looked around the room and back at him, her hand fidgeting with the lace at the bottom of her corset. "You'd be a lot closer."

"I would..."Cullen took his hands out of his pockets and stepped closer to her, reaching for her waist. "Would you like that?...Izzie?" His brow came down to reach hers as he took her hat off and set it on the desk, pulling her closer. 

She looked up at his warm, brown eyes. _Was this what was bothering him so much?_ She paused and gave him a grin. 

"There's another option," He continued as he held her by the waist, "One I'm struggling with. It wouldn't put me as close, but not as far away as I usually am, but It's complicated...I-" 

His voice trailed off and he looked away from her and shook his head. "I don't want to talk about it here. For now I just want to think about this option, and I wanted your input. Your opinion matters to me Izzie. You matter to me." He nuzzled her forehead and closed his eyes, letting out a deep breath he had been holding in. Izzie reached for his face and cupped his jaw.

_Say it Izzie, now is the time, say it damn it..._

She couldn't...

"I -appreciate that." 

_Smooth Izzie, real smooth..._

Cullen gave her a slight scoff, "Thought you might have a bigger reaction than that."

Izzie ran her hand from his face to his jacket collar and sighed pulling him closer to her. "I would if I didn't think you were already holding on to something troubling you. I know you Cullen. I know when something's bothering you, and it isn't this."

Cullen sighed knowing she was right. He was still hoping her reaction was grander but she was right. It sounded too good to be true and he hadn't told her everything yet. 

"I'll explain. I don't want to do it here though. It's more...Sensitive." He took another deep breath and put her hat back on her head and took her hand in his. "Let's go home. We can stop at that sweet shop I like. Get some caramels." He said with a smile as Izzie made sure her ears were covered and adjusted her hat.

.  
..

They hadn't made it far when they heard a fight break out across the street. Cullen had his arm around her waist as he turned to look. Looked like a brawl between a few drunks. It had gotten dark out and was harder to see until a body hit the ground, illuminated by a street lamp. Izzie gasped when she saw a slender bald Elf hit the ground. The thugs all took turns kicking the body on the ground until....

_Poof..._

The Elf let off a small shockwave, pushing the thugs back a moment till they got back up. Cullen squeezed Izzie's hand forcefully before he turned to her, "Get in that alleyway. Hurry! Let me go help him." 

He started to take off when Izzie scolded him, "Oh no you don't! I'm coming with you." It was pointless telling her to stay behind. They ran over to the Elf on the ground. Cullen made the drunks disperse, with his hand hovering over his pistol. The drunken bastards left as Izzie turned the Elf over inspecting his wounds. 

He had a cut on his lip and a larger one on his brow, blood seeping into his eyes. "Cullen! Help me." Cullen looked him over quickly as he wrapped his coat around him. For some reason, this Elf wasn't wearing one. Dirty long sleeved linen shirt and loose brown trousers. There was snow and ice on the ground, he should have been better dressed for the weather. _Was he homeless?_

The Elf's eyes flitted open for a moment then closed again, wincing in pain. "He looks like he might have taken a serious blow to the ribcage." Cullen observed. He was no medic but he had at least a little training from the army. 

"Cullen, he's a magic user. If any of the Watchmen see or catch wind of it they'll take him away. They'll make him get registered. They won't care that he's injured." Cullen nodded and tried to help the Elf to his feet. He wouldn't stand on his own so he carefully picked him up and carried him, Izzie trailing right behind him. 

They passed a few people on the street who gave them a weird look, _"Lad had too much to drink."_ He said to himself. _That's what I’ll say if anyone asks._

Cullen and Izzie made their way home and scrambled up the front steps. Faline was at the door. "What the hell?" Morrigan called out, as she came down the stairs.

Cullen laid the Elf on the sofa and uncovered him. "Faline, can you get a fire started?" Cullen asked. Faline got the fire started as Izzie knelt to examine the Elf. Morrigan hovering and pissed at the intrusion. 

"Poor homeless fellow was getting the shit beat out of him from some drunken bastards. No idea what prompted it but he's-.”

Izzie cut Cullen off. "He's like _me_. Sis can you get towels and hot water?"

Morrigan huffed but went and fetched what she was asked for. Cullen carefully took off the Elf's shirt so Izzie could see what she could do about his injuries. Her hands deftly hovered over the area. He was so pale, and cold, and _handsome,_ she thought as she gently put pressure on his abdomen. The bottom of his ribcage showing deep purple bruising. This was beyond her capabilities but she could try. 

She closed her eyes and reached out. She felt her mana pool towards her fingertips, cold and numbing. She felt past the bone and could sense where it was broken. "I can't set it, I don't know how." 

As soon as she said that, the Elf's hand reached out and grabbed hers. Izzie jumped and Cullen looked alert. Not really sure if this man was violent or not. A soft groan came from the Elf's bleeding lips. "Let me help you," he said, eyes still closed as he laid his palm on top of her hand and guided it over the rib that needed to be set. He winced a moment and braced himself as he let out the smallest vibration. Izzie felt what he was doing. He had set his own bone back where it should be. Izzie's eyes were blown wide as she then focused her healing ability on the area. _Did he really just do that? How did he?_ \- "Faline can you go get the first aid kit? Cullen I'll need you to lift him carefully. He needs the area wrapped."

Morrigan came back with the towels and hot water, as Cullen finished wrapping bandages around the Elf's abdomen, gently laying him back down. Izzie grabbed him a blanket from her hope chest, draping it over him. She knelt beside him, closed her eyes and put her hand gently over his brow, his eyes still closed, she healed his cuts from his brow and ended on his lips. For just a moment, she could have sworn she felt him smile under her fingertips....

.  
..  
...

Izzie knelt at the edge of the sofa, watching over the strange Elf. Cullen was sitting on the armchair across from them, the fire slowly dying. After Cullen told them what happened, Morrigan and Faline had cleaned up the bloody mess of towels and went to bed. His injuries were healed from what Izzie could tell, but the Elf had passed out. Cullen looked at the bandages around him, remembering when Izzie had bandages around her years ago. He hated not being there. He could be now, but-...

"Izzie?" Cullen whispered to her. Izzie's head was resting on the edge of the sofa, she turned her head and smiled at him. 

"Cullen?" He got up and reached his hand down to her to help her up as they quietly went to the kitchen. Izzie went to the pantry to pour him a glass of his Scotch. 

Cullen was sitting at the table, leaning forward, hands folded till she handed him the drink. "Thank you." He paused and took a deep breath as Izzie took a chair and pulled it close, her knees touching his. 

"Do you want to talk about it? The other opportunity?"  
Cullen took a big swig then took her hand in his, running his fingers across her palm and her wrist. His eyes wandering till he started, "The other opportunity...I would be signing on for another year. Would put me in a remote area. Unincorporated land. Not entirely sure how far away but Gaspard made it sound like it was maybe a few hours away." A big sigh and another swig of Scotch. He was wondering if Izzie looked worried but as he looked at her she just smiled and held his hand. "Do you remember when I would visit my Uncle Kenneth? Told you he was in some sort of special regiment. Special Forces?"

"That sounds familiar, yes, I had joked that he was a super secret agent or spy or something." Her tone was playful but Cullen's face was somber. 

"Gaspard told me he was in fact a part of a secret task force. In fact he was one of only a few members before he died. This secret group he was a part of was called the Templars." He paused to let his words sink in. "Have you heard of the legends between Templars and Mages? 

Izzie nodded, "Yes, we learned about it in school. Thousand years ago order or something. Templars were warriors that fought mages with power who went crazy or out of control."

"Yes, apparently it isn't just legend. It's real. It's the real reason my Uncle died..."Cullen's hands went to his glass as he took another sip, setting it down and tapping the glass lightly. 

"What do you mean? I thought he drank himself to death?"

"He did, but not alcohol, Gaspard says it was Lyrium overdose." Cullen hesitated then looked her in the eyes. There was no one else he trusted in the world. He couldn't tell his father what really happened. Perhaps never..."Izzie, I need this to stay between you and me. For now anyways. Gaspard has been authorized by King Edward to bring back the Templars. It's not common knowledge at the moment and it won't be a secret for very long but-...Gaspard, -he wants me to be a part of it."

Izzie stared at him, her head spinning. So many questions rising to the surface. So many thoughts and then just one..."Faline...She heard a rumor. The King is rounding up magic users." She looked at Cullen for confirmation. Disbelief on her face as he nodded. 

Cullen took her hand in his and kissed her knuckles. "Yes, they are collecting known magic users, the documented ones, the ones who get caught using it in public. They are putting them in a new 'Circle' that can help magic users learn how to control their ability, to harness it, possibly learn how to expand and grow their magic, but safely, in a controlled environment."

Izzie was leaning back and shaking her head, Cullen held on to her hand as he continued, "Izzie, what you can do, It's nothing short of amazing. What if you could learn more? You help people. You could help more people. You wouldn't have to hide anymore.-"

She cut him off abruptly, her tone getting increasingly stern, "You'd turn me in?" She pulled her hand from Cullen's. "You'd trust the King and his intentions to help people like me? Better yet! You'd trust _Gaspard_ if he's the one putting this in motion?" She had raised her voice, and Cullen raised his to meet it. 

"What?! No, I wouldn't turn you in, and I don't trust the King and Gaspard, but Izzie.." Cullen peered over to the strange homeless Elf sleeping on the sofa. Softer like a whisper, " Izzie, If they are rounding up magic users, wouldn't you want someone you trust, someone you-"

She cut him off again angrily, "What? To take me away?! Do you think my _healing_ ability is _dangerous_ Cullen?"

"No...no...Izzie..." Cullen was quieter now. This scared her and he knew it. He scared her and it was the opposite of what he wanted...

Izzie got up from the table and started to pace, her head spinning. _Could this really be happening? Was this a new reality?_ The rumors were true… She looked at the Elf on the sofa and then at the ground. Her hand clenched to form a fist and she shook her head. She stood facing Cullen, an arms length or more apart. She breathed in and slowly out, hurt and confused that Cullen even considered that this could be a good thing. The King's policy on magic users was more of a _'Don't use it or make a show of it and we won't tell you to knock it off and put you away.'_ No one knew where " _away"_ was.

As controlled as she could make her voice sound she spoke, " You want me to come out into the light now?" Her tone was accusatory, " _You,_ Morrigan, and Flemeth, thought it best that I hide. For years, I've stayed hidden, safe. The general population thinks people like me are dangerous and must pray to 'evil old Gods'. I'm just shy of a witch doctor Cullen. How could this possibly be a good think for me to come out of hiding?"

Cullen was distraught, his voice breaking. "Please, Izzie, I want you more than anyone else in my life safe. That is why I would be doing this. For you Izzie.-I know there are unknowns, but I want to--Things are changing and I want to know if becoming a Templar can help me protect you."

She cut him off again,- "You are putting an awful lot of faith in the Crown that this won't go south very quickly. What if Gaspard wants to militarize people like me?" Her fist was shaking as she started pacing again.

"It would only be for a year, and if this goes south and Gaspard _does_ want to use people like you for his own purposes, I'm taking you from Orlais and we'll run far away so I can protect you for the rest of my life Izzie." She was shaking her head and backing away slowly. 

Abruptly he stood up and reached for her, catching her shoulders in his grasp, breathy and agitated, "I can't stand the thought of something happening to you. I need to--I’m never letting anything bad happen to you ever again. I love you damn it!"....

.

His grip was too much and he knew it. He hadn't meant for it to come out that way...Izzie was frozen and trembling in his hands. Cullen relaxed his grip as he saw Izzie's eyes begin to mist. He let his grip of her go, shaking his head, ashamed he had raised his voice at her. "That's..Not how I planned on...Izzie wait."

She had turned and quickly hurried up the stairs to her room and closed the door. Cullen sighed and sat back down, grabbing his Scotch, drinking the rest of it and looked over at the Elf on the sofa... _How the hell did he just sleep through that?_ Doesn't matter...  
.

  
..  
...

He didn't hear her. He was almost asleep when she flipped on the lamp at his bedside. Cullen sat straight up in his bed, bare chest highlighted by the lamplight. Izzie stood at his bed in her silky light blue nightgown staring at him, her face more calm from what he could see in the low light. "Izzie, what are you-?"

She sat on the edge of the bed and put her finger to his lips. She looked down and sighed deep before looking back up at him, her eyes swollen and red."It would only be a year?"

"Yes."

Her face searching his, "And you'd protect me the rest of my life?"

"Yes."

Her heart was pounding in her chest, her mouth dry, "You love me? I mean I know we love each other, we just-"

Cullen's lips parted as he swallowed, "With all my heart. It's always been you."  
Her eyes darted back and forth as she slowly climbed forward to straddle his legs, Cullen leaned back on the bed as Izzie took her hand and cupped his face. "I love you too, Cullen"

.

Izzie leaned in and captured his lips in hers. Needy and desperate for his comfort she ran her hand through his curls and pulled him into her, his mouth opening wider to give her better access. Cullen wrapped both his arms around her torso pulling her more on top of him, his large hands sliding up her back to gain more leverage, then back down to her hips, digging his fingers in earnest. Izzie's heart sped up at the pressure and responded by slowly and lightly grinding into him, her lips leaving breathy kisses along his jawline up to his ear, eliciting a groan from him as he kissed her shoulder.

Tonight she wanted him damn it. They had waited long enough. She was done with dancing around it. Cullen took her cue and started to slide his hands up her nightgown, his fingers lacing around her smalls, giving a light tug. Izzie let out a small whine and angled herself to feel his growing erection adding more pressure to the roll of her hips. 

Cullen was panting now and trying to catch his breath, his face felt hot as he tried to gently pull her nightgown up. Izzie's hand abruptly stopped him as she looked down at him. His eyes blown wide. Cullen looked up at her "Izzie...We don't have to..If you don't want to.." 

She stopped him "Cullen, I- it's just-You...I haven't."

"I know Izzie, neither have I."

"I know that, well I guess I didn't know that, but that's not the point. Cullen, I’ve never let you--see me--."

He nodded, his face was soft, his voice softer, "I love you. You are so beautiful, Izzie. What are you worried about?"

She couldn't get the words out. They were stuck in her throat. She took his hand and placed it on her left side, the side she didn't even look at herself standing in front of the mirror. Cullen carefully let his hand roam over the outside of her nightgown, starting at her hip and traveling upwards. He could feel her scars through the thin material. The scars were deep. He knew they were. She had mentioned before that parts of her skin were totally numb and other areas were extremely sensitive. He had always been mindful of that when he hugged her. 

Izzie's breath was hitched as she wet her lip, "Can we turn the lamp off? I just- I don't want to think about you looking at--"

He nodded and gave her a sad smile, "If it would make you more comfortable."

She nodded and he reached over and turned off the light. A small amount of light was coming from his window casting a moonlit glow over her as he lifted her nightgown over her head. His eyes stayed locked on hers till she gave a small smile and leaned into him as he pulled the covers over them...  
.  
..  
...  
....


	7. Fear and Apprehension

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluff and NSFW scene. Izzie and Cole go to the Alienage. Solas thanks Izzie.

The light coming in the window makes Cullen stir a little. He peered down, his arms and large frame wrapped tightly around the love of his life. He had wanted her as long as he could remember, and now she was peacefully sleeping, tucked tightly against his chest. He wondered for a minute if she could breathe like that. The covers were mostly over her head, her nose breathing softly against the little chest hair he had. He carefully adjusted more to his side and looked down at her. His face came down to the top of her head as he breathed her in, closing his eyes again. Normally he'd be an early riser, but not this morning-he's never wanted to stay in bed this bad before...

  
He had terrified her last night though. As much as he loved that she came to him last night, he was guilt ridden. He _yelled_ at her. Her... Of all people. She had every right to be mad at him. To tell him to leave, to go stay somewhere else last night. She came back to him anyways. Perhaps he could have told her in stages? No, he needed her to know. He needed her opinion. Even if he had been considering it more seriously than becoming the new Commander of the Watchmen. She was absolutely right. He _didn't_ trust Gaspard to not use magic users for his own benefit. Cullen was scared he would make an army of them, blackmailing them into serving the Crown. This was _going_ to happen. It was already in motion. Gaspard had asked him to be at the forefront of it. 

  
If he had the power to choose to be a part of it, he could make sure it was being done fairly. He knew a majority of documented magic users were Elves. There were a few human mages, but it was 1 in 1000. He worried about Gaspard's prejudice towards Elves. He worried about the abuse of power that could happen. Gaspard had a temper and liked things done no matter the cost. He had ordered him to proceed with weapon testing even though he told him the lyrium that they got hadn't been refined enough. There was an explosion as a result. Not a very big one. No one got injured. But it was reckless. Gaspard was reckless...

  
It would only be for a year. He'd become a Templar, take the lyrium...Gaspard had told him that they were working on making it non-habit forming. He'd still need to take it weekly to help him be resistant to magic, but Gaspard told him it was optional. Would give him an edge and make him more resilient, that was all. If his uncle really did die from overdose, he would need to be careful. He had tried to tell Izzie that part last night. That wasn't the detail she was focused on....  
He hated the turmoil he caused. The fear in her eyes. He knew this would be hard to swallow, but what if she didn't have to hide anymore? She loved helping people. Thrived on it. If she could make a difference in someone's life, that was everything to her. Kept her going. He had nothing but admiration for her.   
.  
His thoughts made his grip around her tighten till he felt her stir, her big blue eyes looking up at him as she smiled lightly. He pulled back to get a better look at her, cupping her jaw in his hand, he looked at her apologetically. "Izzie,--I'm so sorry I yelled at you last night, I- never thought I-." He half expected her to cut him off but she just looked at him blankly. "I scared you. I didn't mean to. I knew it would worry you. I-... Forgive me."

  
Her expression fell a little and she looked anywhere but his face for a moment, her hand playing with a tuft of hair on his chest. She was quiet for what felt like forever, Cullen felt a weight in his stomach as she returned his gaze again...

  
Steady and calculated, she had put thought into her response. "I fear that wasn't going to go very well, no matter how you told me...I'm sorry I yelled at you too." She paused again searching for the words. The night coming back to her in her sleepy state. "I love you, I know you have my best interests at heart. That was just- I'm just shocked. I- have more questions, just lemme let it sink in today. Can we talk about it more later?" Cullen nodded as she adjusted herself to sit up a bit, pulling the covers around her bare chest. Cullen remained on his side looking up at her. 

  
"I feel awful about last night. I’m sorry Izzie." Cullen reiterated, he still looked worried and ashamed. 

  
Izzie gave him a coy smile that turned into a grin. "I hope you aren't apologizing for _everything_ last night. I quite liked that last part." 

  
His body relaxed at that and he shook his head as his cheeks turned pink, her eyes and smile making him feel young. "I quite enjoyed that too. Look forward to- I mean- That is-If you want to? If you?" 

  
He was so flustered, his eyes wandering and stopping at hers, Izzie bit her lip and smiled wide as she let out a small chuckle. "I'd love to, although we should probably check on the Elf on the sofa downstairs. "

  
"Maker, I forgot all about him. Hope he didn't take the opportunity to steal anything and run. I’m not sure to what extent his injuries are healed."

  
"I made sure he was stable but I don't think he's _running_ anywhere soon." Izzie said.

  
Cullen smiled at her as he leaned in and kissed her, "I'll go downstairs and see if he's ok." He mumbled against her lips before he pulled away. She watched him get up and get dressed, admiring the view as he left. When he was gone she got up and made her way to her bedroom to shower.

  
.  
..

Her thoughts were a mess as she stepped into her steam filled shower; she hoped it would help. As the hot water beat against her skin, she could feel her muscles in her shoulder starting to relax. The aroma from her oils filled her lungs, starting to help her sort her thoughts. 

  
The world _was_ changing, and Cullen was trying to stay ahead of the change. For _her_ , and everyone else like her. She knew he always felt called to protect and serve but this was more. This was _much bigger_ than just local law enforcement. He didn't think small. It was something she loved about him. She had always supported him. This was different though.

  
She thought about when she came to his room last night. She smiled to herself as she ran her creme rinse through her hair. It was everything to her. They had come close a couple times--to taking that step—but she couldn't get past her insecurities. She could live without her arm. Had mostly gotten used to that. But she hated the scars that ran down her side. Her skin looked wrinkled and mangled to her. It wasn't soft, always dry. The once burnt tissue was red and still felt raw occasionally. He understood, and was gentle with her.

  
She slid her hand up the tile wall leaning against it as she stood there, letting the water run down her face, thinking about how good it felt to be touched, to be loved. The passion in his voice when he told her he loved her...

  
"Izzie?" She heard his voice from behind the door; she hadn't locked it. "Izzie,---Can--Can I join you?"

  
She hesitated, _It's fine, He loves you. He won't think less of you in the light. His hands felt so nice...Nothing to hide anymore. ‘It's always been you’..._ She took a deep breath, "Yeah, It's open." 

  
Cullen slowly opened the door and made his way to her, boyish smile as he undressed himself. He looked at her lovingly as he joined her, stepping under the hot water. "Our Elf on the sofa left already. Told Faline he says ‘Thank you’ and that he'll be back to repay the debt somehow." His strong arms wrapped around her as he leaned in for a kiss. She tilted her head up to meet his lips as her arm wrapped around his waist, giving him a squeeze. 

  
"I'm surprised he got up so early. Broken rib should still hurt. Hope he doesn't re-injure it." She sighed looking contemplative. Cullen was listening but his hands were sliding up and down her body, his eyes taking note of the landscape. Her curves drawing him in. He felt intoxicated being there with her. The flowery aroma of her oils and shampoo, the steam obscuring some of his view of her, she looked like a dream. She knew he was only half listening. Couldn't blame him, this was new for them. She felt so exposed. More than she did last night somehow. How could it be so easy to lay bare her thoughts, her fears, her worry, and tell him things she wouldn't tell anyone else, but being completely naked with him now was--something else. 

  
He was gazing at her, mesmerized by her beauty. He couldn't believe how lucky he was right there at that moment. He wanted her to know she was adored. Wanted her to know he would always be hers. That every decision he made was for a future he planned for them. He had hoped and dreamed that she would finally be ready to take the next step. That she wouldn't keep him at arms length now. He knew the distance of being in the military was a huge factor. Not sure if there was more to it. He could only see her every 6-9 months normally. Now it was possible to either see her everyday or...Well he hadn't gotten that far yet. Still needed to have another meeting with Gaspard. _Later.._ Right now he wanted to make up for lost time. Spend all his time with her. Do everything with her...Do what they did last night again...

  
Izzie had taken to leaning her forehead against his chest, his back resting on the tile wall, holding her around her shoulders, running his hands softly up and down her back. He pushed himself off the wall a bit, running his hands up her hair at the nape of her neck. He cradled her head to the side and leaned down to whisper in her ear, low and soft, "Can I feel you, Izzie?"

  
Her soft voice gave a wavering, "Yes." 

  
"Lean your back against me,” he said as he gave her a kiss at her earlobe. She did as he asked, turning to lean back against him, unsure of what to do with her hand until he wrapped his around hers, intertwining their fingers . He pulled her firmly against him as she could feel his growing erection against her backside, he pulled her hair out of the way, his lips and tongue meeting the crook of her neck. He sighed against her skin, a soft "I love you." leaving his lips. He kissed her from her shoulder back up to her ear as he paused, whispering again, "Tell me if I need to stop." He felt her nod her head as he slid his free hand down her scarred side, turning inward at her thigh. She was shorter than him, he had to bend them forward a little to reach. His hand massaging her inner thigh, a little firmer with each stroke. She gave his right hand a squeeze and smoothed her thumb against his, letting him know this was ok. His tongue darting out to taste her neck, stopping to suck at the tender flesh. As he slowly moved his hand closer to her center, he could feel her breathing speeding up, her pulse against his mouth, sucking and grazing his teeth along the expanse of her shoulder. He paused a moment and gave her a tender kiss behind her ear as his hand found her sensitive bud. At his touch she arched her back and let out a quiet whine, her head turning to the side. He watched her lips part, tantalizing, almost making him lose focus. He pulled her tighter, grounding both of them.

His fingers slid in deeper against her core and lightly caressed her inner most folds. Stopping at the peak to swirl his fingers. He was getting painfully erect against her, wanting to grind against her but he needed to keep her steady, his right arm around her waist holding her against him. She had begun rolling her hips against his in sync, his fingers making their way deeper. Her small whimpers had turned into moans as he slid his right hand up from her waist, putting pressure near her sternum, his thumb lightly grazing her breast. Her right hand came around behind his head as she dug her nails into the nape of his neck. She moaned his name as he picked up the pace, bending them both forward to access her more deeply. His fingers swirled up and down her folds stopping at the peak to add pressure where she wanted it most. Her breathing became more labored, more erratic when she gripped the back of his neck with sudden urgency. Cullen sank his teeth into the curve of her neck adding more pressure and picking up speed, until her body shuddered. She convulsed forward letting the waves of electricity flow through her.   
.

  
Her breathing slowing down, she turned around to Cullen, the hot water sliding down his face, his eyes dark, hungry with desire. She swiftly claimed his mouth, her tongue aggressively intertwining with his. Cullen groaned against her lips as he dug his nails into her hips pulling her up into him. Thrusting his erection as in line with her as possible. The fervor of their kiss picking up with their need to join each other.  
"Bed. _Now._ " Izzie's teeth teased his full bottom lip, tugging gently.  
.

He almost fell backward into her desk as she pushed him toward the bed. No more hiding. She was done being timid. Her nipples ached at the rush of the colder air in the room, exciting her. She managed to push Cullen to the edge of the bed and fall into him. A chuckle from him as they fell. He wove his fingers through the hair at the nape of her neck, pulling gently. Their lips never leaving each other, he rolled them over as he pressed against her, his erection at her thigh. She was writhing, panting against him gripping his back. He smiled against her lips as she dug her nails in. He pulled back for a moment eliciting a whine from Izzie. His devilish grin dipping down to slowly kiss from her sternum to her navel and back up again. Izzie couldn't handle the teasing. She found the curls at the nape of his neck and pulled him to her, making him gasp, pulling his ear down to her lips "I need you Cullen. _Now,_ please."

  
"Well, since you said please." He teased playfully, knowing he was driving her mad. His arms found their place on either side of her head as he sunk into her. He paused to let her adjust to his width, afraid he'd hurt her until she dug her heels into his back pulling him in with a final thrust stopping at the hilt, the sensation making her gasp and moan into his mouth. He paused to look her in the eyes, his hand cupped her face, seriousness in his voice, "Tell me to slow down or stop and I will."

  
"You had better not stop" she snapped back at him as he slowly thrust against her. The glorious sound of her moans making him lose control faster than he wanted as he picked up his pace. Her grip was incredibly strong, switching between gripping his hair at the base of his neck, and his broad shoulders she loved so much. It took him higher till he sucked in a gasp. His whole body stiff and then shaking, his mouth coming down on hers for a kiss, then pulling back up as he groaned. He gave a couple more smaller thrusts as he came down to earth. Waves of pleasure slowly making his body go limp.

  
He carefully scooted down her body, resting his head on her stomach. Peppering kisses between heavy breaths along her abdomen before turning his head to the side resting his cheek. Her hand was in his curls lightly massaging his scalp. She sighed happily. Sated and serene. Cullen gave her a kiss below her sternum and looked up at her."I swear I'll last longer than that someday my love, but you've got to stop being so firm with your grip. You push me over the edge so fast."

  
She chuckled warmly at him, "I thought it was perfect. I'm glad you enjoyed that."

  
Cullen let out a pleased _hmm_ as he nuzzled his face into her skin. They laid there a while like that till they heard a pair of footsteps through the hallway. Morrigan was up... They quietly grinned knowingly at each other, slight embarrassment rising to Izzie's cheeks.

"You think they heard anything?" She whispered.

"I really don't know. If either of them did, I fear it'll be painfully obvious as soon as we go downstairs."

Izzie let out a giggle. "I suppose we should get dressed now."

Cullen looked her over and pulled up to lay at her side. His hands grazing her body up and down, admiring the dips and curves of her body. He scooted up to rest his head on her shoulder as she turned her head to kiss him, his hand reaching for her waist pulling her close. "Few more minutes." He looked into her eyes so intensely. His hand came to cup her face,"I love you Izzie." His eyes were glassy as he gazed at her, "I love you so much... I'm yours."

  
His words, the seriousness of his voice. There was an odd lump in her throat. Words she had tried to get out in the past that were becoming much easier to say now.

  
"I love you too Cullen. I'm so glad you're home."

"Me too."  
.

  
She leaned in and kissed again before they got up and got dressed. Cullen couldn't take his eyes off her. She grinned when she caught him staring. He hadn't shown any discomfort about her scars. Wasn't like they were invisible to him. The love in his smile made her feel less self- conscious.

  
"Did your brother mention something about meeting them for Pool at the hotel?" Izzie asked as she fumbled through her armoire for a blouse and pants.

  
"Yes, I believe about noon. I need to stop by Gaspard's first, continue our discussion about the ‘special assignment’. I want more information before I re-sign for another year. What were your plans for today?" Cullen asked as he watched her expertly manage to get dressed with one hand. Surprised at how fast she could. He supposed that's why her clothes were looser, to make it easier.

  
She stood in front of her mirror adjusting her blouse, "Cole will stop by soon. He and I are going to take the extra medicine I was able to make and distribute it to people at the Alienage." She paused a moment to think, "I wonder if I'll run into our overnight guest there. Hope he is doing ok."

  
Cullen walked up behind her to put his arms around her waist, looking at them in the mirror. Love radiating from his smile as he put his chin on her shoulder. He loved the way she cared for others. "I love that you do that. Glad Cole goes with you too. He's a good kid."  
She reached her hand up to his face behind her, smoothing her hand over his stubble. Looking at him in the mirror. Her eyes scanned over their pose. Seeing Cullen's arms around her made her feel so whole. So happy he's home. "Breakfast?"

  
Cullen nods and then kisses her neck, before they head downstairs.  
.  
..  
...

Cullen walks Izzie down the street to meet with Cole at the bakery, still blushing from the teasing grin Faline gave him at breakfast. Morrigan must not have heard anything, or if she did she was tight lipped about it. Cole smiles as Izzie hands him the box of baked goods they are taking to the Alienage. Cullen leaves the pair to talk to Gaspard, giving Izzie a kiss on the forehead before he leaves.

  
Their feet crunch in the snow and ice on the ground. The sky is clear and the sun is out but it's still very cold. Izzie hopes the medicine and the pastries help. Not everyone at the Alienage is Elven, some are just people trying to get back on their feet, some just like living in a community. It's incredibly inexpensive housing. Most units are just a studio, small and not the best insulated, but it’s a roof over one’s head. She hopes they can make someone, anyone's day better.

  
As they round the street the Alienage comes into view. A semi circle of buildings with a large willow tree in the center. The tree holds a surprising amount of snowfall back from the ground. Cole is handing out pastries to the kids playing with a ball in the street when he turns to Izzie, "I believe Athena had her baby yesterday. We could say _'Hi'_."

  
Izzie is looking through their satchels of medicine, counting what they have and the number of homes. They have enough to distribute to everyone here. There's only about 20 units. Families no larger than 4 typically. Thankful again for the Elfroot Cole found for her. She hesitates a moment after counting, distracted. "Yes, we should see how the new mother is."

  
They make their rounds to the units delivering the cold medicines when they are stopped at one unit by a familiar face. Abelas smiles pleasantly as he opens the door, seeing who it is. "Izzie? What do I owe the pleasure?" He's surprisingly more chipper than the last time she saw him. He awkwardly leans against the door frame, ducking his head under it. 

  
"Abelas, It's good to see you. I didn't know you lived here. We were just giving out medicines. We have plenty, would you like one?"

  
"Ma serannas, I'd rather someone else get it though. If I get sick-I- well- I know where to find you." He hoped that didn't sound weird. 

  
She smiled warmly and nodded. "How's your head?" she tilted hers to look as Abelas turned his head for her. 

"It's much better, occasional headaches but not as bad--" Abelas voice trailed off as he looked behind them.

A pair of Watchmen were holding a paper up to people asking for information of some kind. They noticed the tall Elf eyeing them and walked over to Cole, Izzie and Abelas. A red haired dwarf and brown haired human held out a composite sketch. 

"Excuse us, but have you seen this man? We heard a rumor of a magic user practicing yesterday and we were looking for more information. Not sure if he's registered or not." The dwarf handed Izzie the sketch. Her heart sank as she looked over the sketch. Definitely reminiscent of the bald Elf that stayed the night previously. Izzie's eyes darted over the paper, her heart beating faster in her chest. Did someone see last night? Did word get around that quickly? Or was he truly a wanted man?

"Haven't seen him." Izzie firmly holds the paper back out to the dwarf. Confident in her resolve. She had heard Cole start to interject when she continued, "We will be sure to let you know if we see him though." 

The Watchmen tipped their hats and left. Abelas had a scowl on his face, arms crossed watching them leave. Abelas asks Izzie, his eyes still trained on them. "Does that happen often?"

Izzie sighs, "I'm afraid I don't get out enough to know just how often but yes, it's fairly common unfortunately."

Cole lowers his voice only for them. "The man in the sketch, he's the one who gave me the Elfroot." 

Izzie turned to Cole, surprise in her voice. “What? You're joking." 

  
"It's not a joke Izzie" Adamant that he was not mistaken. 

  
Abelas looked to Izzie, "The man who gave you Elfroot for the medicine you made?"

  
"Apparently." It came out dry. She was hoping that maybe she could run into him at the Alienage and thank him properly. Maybe warn him that the Watchmen were looking for him. She thought about the new reality Cullen told her about. It was already common for the Watchmen to take interest in rumors like this. Would they force people from their homes against their will, once Gaspard made news of the new Circle public knowledge? Izzie pondered as she looked around the Alienage. _Would they tear families apart?_

  
She would voice these concerns to Cullen later. Right now she was busy. She turned to Abelas who was still scowling at the Watchmen. She smiled politely at him "See you around Abelas? We're off to check in on a new mother."

  
"Ahh, yes, that must be the source of the screams last night." His face softened, "Heard she named him Theo." Abelas shifted his stance. "Dareth Shiral" He nods appreciatively before Izzie and Cole head to Athena's.  
.

  
Athena's home is a little larger than Abelas' room. She is glad to meet the one that gave her the anti- nausea medicine. She's only met Cole. She asks Izzie if she can make a rash creme for her new baby. She smiles and offers her sleeping newborn to Izzie to hold. Awkward but not wanting to seem rude, Izzie declines.

  
"Oh that's ok, thank you. I'm terrible around kids. Don't want to make him cry." Athena's eyes travel to her lack of left arm, she gives a sympathetic nod. 

  
Cole chimes in, "Can I hold him?" She nods and smiles as she hands him the baby. 

  
Cole holds baby Theo in his arms, lightly cooing at the small wonder. "Theo, you like that name don't you?" Theo's tiny hand took Cole's finger, shaking it like a greeting in his tiny grasp."Theo is a good name, I'm Cole."

  
Izzie watched Cole's face beaming. It pulled at her heartstrings to see him so happy around kids. She looked over his shoulder to admire Theo herself. The newborn had blonde hair like his mother. The tiniest of features. She had forgotten how small they were. It had been years since she held her youngest sibling in her arms. A pang of sadness washed over her. The real reason she'd rather not hold him. Didn't want to think about her inability to have a child herself. After the tragedy/incident her body was never the same. Morrigan took her to a clinic to confirm her fears when she stopped having a cycle. It wasn't like she was set on having children someday, but it hurt nonetheless. One of the reasons she kept Cullen at arms length. She knew he wanted kids someday. Talked about having one or two when he was done with the military. That was before though. Wasn't sure he knew she couldn't give him that life....A conversation they would have going forward someday.  
.

  
Cole and Izzie bid Athena farewell and finished handing out the medicines. They walked in silence a ways till Izzie told Cole about their 'Elfroot man' staying on the sofa last night. "He's not one to start a fight Izzie. He's just trying to keep his head down like you."

  
"I thought maybe he was homeless. Wasn't dressed for the weather. Thought maybe I'd see him at the Alienage."

  
Cole shook his head, "He doesn't live there. He's got a view. He's not rich but he can see many things."

  
Cole didn't always make sense, but she didn't pry. Faline was probably right that the Elf would probably rather keep his privacy. Still she couldn't help her curiosity at his gift. Or was it gifts? Were there magic users in Val Royeaux who had multiple abilities? Maybe she'd still get to ask him about it. Faline mentioned he might stop by and say "Thank You".

  
Izzie sighed before she changed the subject. "Would you like to stay for a cup of cocoa?"

  
"I like cocoa." Cole smiled at her from under his large floppy hat.  
.  
..

  
Solas watches them leave, out of their line of sight. He smiles at her kind nature. He had watched from afar. Watched her not give him up to the Watchmen. He wanted to thank her. But how? How could he possibly say thank you to her. He hadn't thought this far. Didn't want to bother her or interfere in her life anymore than he already had. He had just wanted to see the extent of her magic. Nothing more. His guilt pained him. It was simple to her. She saw someone hurt, and didn't hesitate to help, to heal him. He backs into an alley to lift his shirt up to check on his ribcage. He notices the once deep purple bruise is yellowing already. He smiles to himself. Imagining what she could do with more power, more practice, honing her ability. If he could determine if she retained the power of the Orb... Did it just need to be unlocked? Could she draw from the fade even if he could hardly do it himself?   
.  
..

  
Cullen is playing pool with Branson at the hotel while their father is getting another round of drinks. A beer in their hands as they take turns. Cullen asks Branson, "Now that father is out of earshot, how is Mom?"

  
Branson speaks up after a sip, "Mother is doing fine. Even better now that father hired her a farm hand as part of the divorce settlement. Don't bring it up with him though." Branson says as he smiles into his beer, eyeing Cullen as he lines up his next shot. 

  
"Alright I'll bite. Why do we not want to bring it up?" Cullen leans over the pool table, looking for another angle.

  
Branson smirks as he shuffles his stance, looking over to their father at the bar, then back at Cullen. "She's sleeping with the man he hired for her. Oh- and he's an Elf."

  
Cullen shakes his head, "Is he mad that he's hired help or that he's an Elf?"

Branson replies, "I don't know. I think he's mostly mad she found someone to replace him so fast." 

Cullen shakes his head as he misses his shot. Branson goes to line up as he asks about his opportunities he has yet to decide on. 

"I'm not sure yet. Had a meeting with Gaspard this morning to talk about specifics. There's an option to re-sign a year for a special project, I could go back to weapon testing, or I could opt out and try for the new Commander of the Watchmen position. There's another that has been offered the job as well though. 'Pentagast' or something I believe her name was."

"Sounds like you should sweep the rug out from underneath her feet." Branson makes his shot.

A surprised expression on Cullen's face forms at his brother as their father comes back with another round of drinks. "Thank you." He turns to Branson again. "You think I should become a local? Return to civilian life?"

" _I_ don't know what you want." A little under his breath, "I'm just betting Izzie would like that." Another smirk into his beer as he takes another sip.

  
Cullen lightly smiles and nods.

  
His father lights a cigar, looking at both his boys, trying to catch up. "How has she been? Really?" He takes a drag of his cigar before continuing, "I- know this time of year is hard for her. She's been quiet since we got into town."

  
"She's quiet cause you won't stop talking." Branson elbows his father, his chin resting on the end of the pole cue.

  
Cullen replies, "She's doing quite well actually. She's out delivering medicines right now. No matter what direction I take, soon she'll have me closer. Nothing would make me happier."  
Branson gives him a knowing look as Cullen smiles. "We've-uh- re-connected."

  
"Wow! Finally grabbed your sac and told her how you feel?" Branson asks crudely.  
Cullen rolls his eyes but can't wipe the grin off his face, "In a manner of speaking yes, and it seems she feels the same. We both have for some time, just never got the timing right." 

Cullen's father smiles at that, "Glad you make each other happy son."

Cullen lines his pole up and sinks a ball into his corner, standing up to face his Father. "I think we do."  
.  
..  
...

  
Izzie is back in her room cleaning and organizing her desk when Faline knocks on her door. "Izzie, you have a visitor. He's downstairs." Izzie wipes her hand on her trousers and heads downstairs. _Did Cole forget his hat again?_

  
She stops halfway down the stairs as she notices what looks like flowers in someone's hands, standing at the door. _Cullen?_ She starts to smile to herself as she bounds down the stairs, caught off guard as she reaches the hearth. "Oh." She stumbles to find her words, looking at the mysterious bald Elf standing at the door. He looks-good- well better- he looks better- not hurt with blood and slush from the ground covering him. He's wearing a collared dress shirt with a green corduroy jacket and brown canvas pants. He smiles politely at her as her attention turns to a basket of flowers in his hands. Sprigs of Elfroot and several clusters of Crystal Grace. 

  
He steps forward nervously, "I- wanted to thank you for coming to my rescue last night. I'm afraid- I'm not sure-- This does not sufficiently show my appreciation for what you and your friend did." 

  
She feels her cheeks flush. She looks at the basket in his hands and back at him. His eyes are sincere, but almost-sad. "You are very welcome-I hope you are taking it easy- I never caught your name?"

  
"I am, thank you-my name is Solas. Sorry, I should have started with that. And you are?" He trips over his words as he hands the flowers to her as she steps closer.

  
"Isolde, but everyone calls me Izzie." She states as she gazes at the blue hues of the Crystal Grace. "These are beautiful. They don't grow around here, especially in the winter months. Where did you get them?"

  
He grins, "I grow them myself actually. That among other things in a greenhouse. I believe we have a mutual friend, Cole." He pauses, clasping his hands behind his back, "He says you're an herbalist. I thought if you wouldn't make use of them, that maybe you would like them anyway."

  
"Yes, Cole is a dear friend." Her eyes meet his as she smiles. "It's quite rare to see these. I've never used them before like that. I'd love to look into its medicinal properties though." A pause. "What else do you grow?" She asks intuitively.

  
"A variety of plants, mostly flowers, but several that have their uses." Solas retorts.  
She gives him a raised eyebrow, "One of those perhaps, a particular variety of Elfroot?" She looks at the basket and notices the Elfroot is the same Cole brought her a few days ago.

  
"Yes, Royal Elfroot. I hear it's especially powerful when making medicines." He tries to say it dryly, knowing she's onto him. His hands fuss trying to find his coat pockets.

  
Her eyebrows are raised as she looks up to him. He's not much taller than her, not as tall as Cullen. _I shouldn't pry. But..._ She challenges his statement with an observation, her eyes searching his face, "It seems you are gifted in more ways than one?" She says with a gleam in her eye.

  
He's taken by surprise at her statement. Was she- being coy? No, of course not...The heat rises to his cheeks in embarrassment, as he realizes what she meant. " Ahh- yes that...There are a few gifts or abilities I have. "He chuckles to himself as he realizes how it sounds. "The shockwave I sent off last night.-"

  
"Yes, and the much smaller one you used to help me set your bone back in its place." Amazement and curiosity in her voice.

  
"I can hardly take much credit for that. You sealed my wounds with a gesture. It's quite impressive." He smiles at her warmly.

  
"Thank you."

  
He ponders a moment, lost in his train of thought. He shakes his head. It dawns on him how he can return her kindness. "Uh- If you'd like, I can make what I have in my greenhouse available to you. For your herbalism needs. I know supplies can be costly. It's no trouble. I-have-an 'ability' that allows me to speed up the process of harvesting."

  
"Truly?" She replies, glee in her eyes. _Cole was right, he had multiple abilities._

  
"It would be my way of expressing my thanks again." He shuffles awkwardly a moment, as he clears his throat, "I should be going, I'll tell Cole to bring you by whenever you'd like. If- that's all right?"

  
"That- would be lovely. Thank you again for the flowers." She pauses a moment as she sees Faline come around the corner to take the flowers from her as she continues, "Oh, you should know that the Watchmen are looking into a 'disturbance' they heard about last night. Had a sketch that sort of looked like you."

"Ahh yes, I am aware, but thank you. I'll keep my head down."

  
Izzie opens the door for him,"It was good to meet you Solas."

  
He turns halfway down the stairs to look back at her and nod, a smile on his face, "You as well, Izzie".  
.

  
Izzie closes the door behind him, the bundle of Elfroot and Crystal Grace on the counter in the kitchen. She starts to inspect the delicate herbs when Faline startles her. "What a lovely gesture."

  
She's standing by the pantry behind Izzie. She catches her breath after a beat, "They are quite lovely. Very thoughtful of him." Faline walks to the counter where Izzie is attempting to trim the stems by herself. The end of her left arm was being used to try to hold the bundle still. 

  
Faline gets a vase out for her out from the cabinet and helps hold the plants still as Izzie uses the kitchen shears. "You can ask for help you know, won't kill you."

  
"I know, sorry." 

  
Faline smirks to herself and shakes her head as she puts some of the flowers in the vase. "Cullen is going to think he has competition." She teases Izzie who turns to glare at her. 

  
"Cullen has never needed to compete for my love." Firm but not angry at her statement.

  
"I know dear. Just couldn't help but notice that Elf was smiling at you while he struggled to come up with how to thank you. His hands were fidgety."

  
Faline making light of his situation turned her thoughts sour. She hadn't seen how he was attacked. Only saw what he looked like after. She remembers seeing his body hit the ground. It could have been so much worse… Her eyebrows knitted in the middle. If she only knew what's been on her mind since last night.

  
Izzie shrugs, her voice dry, "I'd be at a loss for words too if a stranger saved my life. I’m sure I'd be incredibly awkward as well waking up in an unfamiliar place."

  
Faline realizes the parallel situation Izzie had been in herself. Not realizing this Elf's well being affected her this deeply.

  
"Izzie-I...I hadn't thought of it like that. I'm sorry."

  
"It's ok. I know you mean well. I didn't mean to come off so snappy. Too much on my mind as of late." She pauses to take the Elfroot and a few sprigs of Crystal Grace for her medicines, the rest staying in the vase. Faline notices she seems unsettled.

  
"Everything alright with you and Cullen?" No teasing in her voice.

  
"Yeah, we are fine. Better than fine but-he's just got a decision to make soon and it's giving us both anxiety I think. " She shakes her head and stands there a moment. Not sure what to do with herself. She looks at the Crystal Grace in her hands and lets out a deep breath. "I'll be in my room, reading about what to do with this."

  
Faline looks at her with sincerity in her eyes. "Cullen's family leaves for Ferelden soon. Cullen I'm sure will be back after he takes them to the train station. I'll let you know when dinners' ready."

  
A solemn smile as she looks at Faline, "Thank you," as she turns to head to her room.

.  
..  
...


	8. Dareth Shiral, Cullen Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen prepares to leave, making sure Izzie will be taken care of.

"Izzie?"

  
She looks over her shoulder from her desk to see Cullen standing leisurely in her doorway against the frame. One hand in his pocket, the other hanging loosely at his side. His amber eyes lowered, smiling softly at her from across the room. He notices her half eaten dinner plate pushed aside, her music stand holding up her book of herbs, cup of tea he assumes in her hand. He's back late. It's dark outside. Izzie's bedroom illuminated by the lamps at her nightstands.

  
"Hey, there." She smiles at him as she puts her cup down, standing up to meet him in the middle of the room. His head comes down into the crook of her neck as he wraps his arms around her.

  
"Hi" He mumbles into her neck and pauses a moment, breathing her in... She loves when he holds her like this. Loves feeling his freshly shaved face on her neck. His warm breath against her skin. It always soothes her, but she can feel some tension from him. His posture feels stiff, rigid. His breathing more like heavy sighs.

  
He brings his face up a little nuzzling against her cheek. He gives her a small squeeze as he kisses the side of her lips. She leans back in his arms to look at him, taking in some sadness in his eyes. "How was your day?" She smiles at him hoping it helps.

  
He sighs, looks down and back up at her, "You first." He motions her to sit with him on the edge of her bed.

  
Izzie sits next to him, putting her head on his shoulder as she speaks," It was good. The people at the Alienage were happy to get some medicines, we had more than enough for everyone. Cole got to hold a newborn...Oh, did you know Abelas lives there?"

  
"Yes, sort of, I told him he could find a place to stay there. How was he?" Cullen's voice sounding less stressed.

  
"Good, says he hardly gets headaches. Glad what I did helped him." She pauses a moment, smoothing the lines on her trousers. "There were some Watchmen at the Alienage, looking for the Elf we helped. He stopped by earlier. His name is Solas. Thanked us for helping him, healing him." She pauses, a little lighter in her tone. "It just so happens, he's got a green thumb like me." She says.

  
Cullen turns to kiss her forehead resting on his shoulder, "Is that where the flowers came from I saw in the kitchen?"

  
"Yes, he grows them himself. I guess Cole knows him too." Izzie tilts her chin up to look at Cullen. His gaze warm but still troubled. Izzie hooks a finger in his collar pulling him into a kiss and rests her brow against his. Softly, "Your turn."

  
Cullen shifts as he leans forward on his elbows, folding his hands and stares ahead, "Took my father and brother to the station, we got a bite to eat first. They said to tell you 'goodbye'." His knees slightly bouncing as he continues, "Saw Gaspard this morning. He's got a woman lined up for the Knight Commander of the Watchman. 'Cassandra Pentagast'. I've looked her up. She'd be good for the city. No strong bias against any minority, no history of favoritism, in fact she seems like someone I'd like to work with on a professional level, were that an option."

He pauses, " I tried to press Gaspard for more information about becoming a Templar. Said I'll know more 'when I get there'. Whatever that means. Only weird piece of information I got was he hoped I didn't have any 'pre-existing entanglements' with any known magic users."  
"Do...you think he knows about me?" Izzie hesitated to ask. Concern in her voice but careful this time in choosing her tone.

  
"I don't think so, no, I think it's probably standard for everyone. Don't want someone biased I suppose." He looked at her with a small smile on his face. "Just means I'll need to keep us a secret- for now. Protect you like I planned to." She smiled back at him. He hesitated continuing but she took his hand in hers.

  
"Im not asking you to 'come into the light' Izzie. I want you to stay safe...When I-... _If_ I decide to go down this path. I still-..."

  
Cullen paused as he watched Izzie pull back a little, her posture stiffening. She shifted her knees towards him and smoothed her thumb over his knuckles his hand. Looking down, biting her lip a little on the corner, a deep breath and slow exhale as she met his gaze. "You really want to do this. Don't you?"

  
Cullen cupped her jaw in his hand, looking her in her eyes, "Part of me really dosen't want to. Part of me really just wants to stay here. Be near you always...But I want a better future for you. People like you. I feel like it's the right thing to do. If I can help shape that future...I- want that future _with_ you...."

  
Izzie's face and posture softened, a smile growing on her face. "Cullen..."

  
Cullen took both his hands and held her face. His foot softly tapping with nervous energy knowing he was about to lay his heart bare... "I want to plan a future for us. I want you with me always. I want to wake up every morning with you. Kiss you goodnight, every night. I love you Izzie, -"

  
She smiled wide as she swiftly pulled him by the nape of his neck, her lips capturing his. He cradled her head in his hands, sighing between breaths. _You can cut me off with a kiss anytime you want to._ He smiled against her lips as he returned her kiss with intensity, causing a soft moan from the back of her throat. His fears of a future without her, silenced by the raw emotion overwhelming him. Her grip, her fingers digging into his neck, confirming the feelings he hoped she reciprocated. He knew she always had a hard time coming up with the right thing to say when they talked about their relationship, but this kiss, told him what he needed to know. Heat rose to his chest as his heart swelled. 

  
She slowed down their kiss trying to catch her breath, her lips gliding slower against his. Stopping to place tender kisses from his lips to his jawbone, and back to his lips she couldn't stay away from. He might have to leave soon, but right now, he was absolutely hers. His hands firmly held her in place, thumbs caressing her cheekbones, not wanting the kiss to end. 

She placed one more kiss on his forehead as she carefully pulled back slightly. She looked up at him, her eyes glowing from the soft light from the lamp on her nightstand. Cullen smiled affectionately as he pulled her into his lap, her legs hanging off the sides of his thighs, her arm coming to wrap around his shoulders as she whispered softly into his ear, "I love you Cullen." His large hands squeezed her thighs and traveled up to her hip, pulling her as close as he could manage. His head resting on her shoulder ducked to place kisses on her collarbone, as she ran her fingers through his curls. _This_ was the man she loved, and the man who loved her back. _Her_ Cullen. She looked down at him, warmth radiating from her smile,

"I love you. I don't want a future without you...I'm all yours." 

She paused a moment, remembering why she could never get the words out. She let out a deep breath as her stomach twisted. She leaned back in his arms. Her expression must have given it away..."What is it?" Cullen asked. His hands kneading softly at her thighs. The small voice of doubt creeping in. _Am I enough?_

"I need to- tell you something. I don't know how it affects the future you want with me. I- Cullen I--I can't um--"

Cullen wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her neck before he spoke. "We don't have to have children. If- that is what you were worried about."

"Oh." 

"I understand If- having children is out of the question for you- I'm assuming for a few different reasons. I know a few years ago I mentioned I wanted children someday. If I recall, there was a grimace on your face when I said it."

"Were- were you aware I can't, even if I wanted to?"

His head tiled up from the crook of her neck. His eyes searching hers with concern. " No- I wasn't aware." A pause as he shook his head softly. His eyes dropped as he searched for the words. "I'm so sorry. I just thought maybe you-...Maybe it would be to painful? "

"I- yes."

He held her close as he kissed her again. She pulled him close to her, as a small tear ran down her face. His hand coming up to cradle the back of her head. His fingers wove through her hair softly as he took out the cord holding her hair in place. Her wavy brown hair freed as he ran his fingers through it as she leaned her head into his touch. That loving look on his face again as he wiped the tear off her cheek. "Izzie, my love, being with you is far more important to me than having children. You are enough for me. I just want you."

His ear to ear smile warmed her heart. His future as a Templar would still worry her, but hearing that she was enough for him. He loved her, adored her, wanted to take care of her, protect her. _His_ love...No, _their_ love drowned out her fears in that moment. _She was enough._ She fell into him as he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her backwards into the bed, smiling into another kiss.  
.  
..

  
**5 days left...**

  
Morrigan is leaning back in her armchair, coffee in hand, scowling at Cullen across the chess set in the study/ Flemeths old room. It's a bit of a mess in this room. Boxes of books and old clothes, mattress on the floor but frame and bedposts taken apart leaning against the wall.

  
"Tell me one more time so I understand it clearly." Morrigan crosses her leg giving him an un-amused look.

  
Cullen is leaning forward over the chess pieces, contemplating his next move, _his next words._ After a beat he moves a piece and leans back a little. Taking a deep breath to look at the board again as he speaks. " I'm leaving in a few days for a special assignment. One I've been told I can't talk about. As of this morning I accepted the new position and have been told I can't disclose where I'm going. I don't even know where I'm going. Its still in Orlias but that's all I know." He pauses in case she has any questions.

  
Morrigan leisurely moves a piece and yawns. She takes a sip of coffee before she speaks. "I got that part. I'm sure you told Izzie more, tis' fine with me, probably better I don't know so I can act oblivious with Gaspard."

  
"You and everyone else in Orlais will know soon enough." Cullen assures her.

  
"Yes, you said it has to do with the recent rumors of the King putting magic users somewhere 'safe'."

  
"Correct, but that being said, I won't be able to keep tabs on how they are implementing things here. I wanted to ask you if I could hire someone to watch the house." Cullen moves a chess piece and winces at what he knows is coming next.

  
"You mean protection." She states, "I know you mean Izzie. I don't need protection." She scoffs and takes a sip of coffee. Cullen had gotten her a pistol after Flemeth disappeared and taught her how to wield it proficiently. 

  
"I know that, but it would make me feel better and then Izzie won't think Im as worried about her hopefully. I've convinced her this only because I won't be able to communicate with her for the next 6 months."

  
"Only 6 months?" Morrigan raises an eyebrow.  
"Yes, but It could take longer. Gaspard thinks by 6 months I should be able to have things set up nicely so I can take some leave."

  
Morrigan pauses to let it sink in again, and looks over the pieces. " So who would you be hiring to 'protect and watch over us'? She raises an eyebrow at him as she takes one of his pieces.

  
"I was thinking of that 'Sam' fellow I met. Said he's worked security detail before. Got to know him a little the few days we traveled together."

  
Morrigan nodded, "Izzie mentioned he was an Elf. She seemed to get a good read on him too. Doesn't mean I'll like him though. I don't need someone watching my every move."

  
"He won't. Again, this is more for Izzie but I want to make sure the most important women in my life are taken care of." He shoots her a grin. 

  
She knows he's trying to butter her up. She'll let him have that. She grins back at him. Morrigans' quiet for a while until she releases a breathy sigh as she taps her nails against her mug.

  
"I suppose 'Sam' can stay in the guest bedroom since you arn't using it anymore?" She teases him as she moves another piece.

  
Cullen blushes a little as he nods and looks down at the board. " Yes, I believe I won't be needing the guest bedroom anymore." He looks over their pieces again and makes his final move winning the game. He leans back and folds his hands. Morrigan leans forward and looks down in suprise. "Well played Major. I see you've been practicing your strategy."

  
Cullen smiles wide and gets up, "Sort of, Im still terrible at chess. It's just much easier to win against you in the morning, when you're still half asleep." Morrigan shakes her head and grins into her coffee cup, admitting defeat.  
.  
..

  
**4 Days Left**

  
_Tap tap tap!_

  
Abelas hears a knock on his door. _Who could that possibly be?_ He pinches the bridge of his nose before he gets up from his small table in his flat.

  
There's surprise in his voice as he opens the door to see Cullen standing there. Snowfall accumulating on his shoulders. "Cullen? It's good to see you. What can I do for you?"

  
Cullen peers into Abelas' flat a moment before answering. He takes note of the mess of papers on his table and the pen in his hand. "Am I interrupting? I was hoping you'd have a moment."

  
Abelas looks back at his papers and back at Cullen and shrugs. " Responding to job listings, I've- had trouble filling them out. Id love to take a break. Come in." Abelas stands aside as Cullen makes his way to the opposite chair at the table. Abelas clears the table of papers and heads to the fridge bringing back two beers, handing one to Cullen.

  
"Thank you." 

  
" You're welcome, sorry it's not whiskey." Abelas replies as he pops the top off his beer and takes a sip. _Beer is much better than whiskey._

Cullen sighs and gives him a smile, "Beer is good too." 

  
Abelas shifts in his chair and leans back, "So what do I owe the pleasure? How has leave been?"

  
"Wanted to stop by and see how you were doing. It's good, time off has been wonderful." He takes a sip of his beer before he continues, "I've been offered a promotion."

  
Abelas leans back in his chair. "That's good. Was it something you were hoping for?"

  
"Not exactly, but it's an opportunity I'd like to be apart of. Special project of sorts I'm- hoping will make a difference in the future. Promote positive change... If I can help it." Cullen's eyebrow raised for a moment before taking another sip of beer.

  
"That- almost sounds to good to be true." Abelas could sense the hesitation at the last part, or was it sarcasm? Still trying to get better at reading social cues these days.

  
"You are correct. I'm-afraid if I don't chose this path, that someone less qualified could be chosen, and actually I'm not at all qualified, but no one else I know is either..." 

  
He scratches the back of his head. _I'm worried about abuse of power_ , Cullen thinks to himself.

Abelas gives him a nod. "I understand. It is good you do not have blind faith in your government or superiors. Makes you less corruptible."

"Yes, unfortunately I know a few people with a more 'fluid' moral compass." Cullen pauses and peels the label on his beer slightly with his thumb. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come here and bore you with my decisions. I came to offer you a job."

"Oh?"

Cullen leans forward with his elbows on the table, neck of the beer in his hand. "Originally I was going to take the open position as Knight Commander of the Watchmen, was thinking of making you a officer if that was something you'd be interested in. Now that my trajectory has changed, my priorities have as well."

"I- see." A little disappointment in his voice. 

Cullen continues, " I have something else in mind if you are interested. Something you are more familiar with. Something along the lines of- 'security detail'."

That peaked Abelas' interest. " You have my attention."

"Good, like I said, my priorities have changed. The world is changing, with change there comes some apprehension." Cullen pauses and looks down before continues. " I can't go into detail but it worries someone I care about."

Abelas nods and takes a sip, "The woman you care about-Izzie."

"Yes. I'm afraid I won't be able to stay in contact with her as often. I've calmed her fears as much as I can. I'm hoping you be interested in, -well keeping my 'interests' protected."

A confused expression grows on his face, "Izzie needs protection?"

Cullen paused again. He hated how this sounded. Like accepting this promotion made her a target. His hand came around his head, trying to ease the tension in his neck...

A deep breath and steady exhale, "Yes. Izzie, her sister Morrigan, and Faline."

 _Although Morrigan insists she doesn't need protecting, Id like to have that peace of mind anyways that someone is watching over them._ Cullen thinks.

Abelas put down his beer and crossed him arms. He leaned forward a bit straitening his posture. " Is it because of Izzie's gift? I'm aware that magic users are encouraged to get registered in the system. I'm assuming she isn't."

"Yes, I- well there's more to it than that but- I can't talk about it. I'm hoping I can count on your discretion. I'd be counting on you to be my eyes and ears as well. I want to make sure..."

His voice trailed off. He knew this would be hard to talk about but he wasn't prepared to explain the situation. He continues, his voice more somber.

"The change that's coming. It'll affect people like her. The way the system treats people like her. I'm going to try and make sure things are done fairly. Unfortunately, there are those in power that would rather people like her were locked up, or worse-..." 

_Careful Cullen._ He reminded himself not to give to much detail.

Abelas unfolded his arms, resting his elbows on his knees, his features softened. Concern in his voice. " Or worse...That's the apprehension. The unknown."

"Yes."

"I see. So, keep her anonymous and be wary of people interested in her. If I suspect any threat against her, I'm to protect her with my life."

Cullen looks up at Abelas, "Can you handle that? I'd pay you exceptionally well. I already spoke with her sister Lady Morrigan. You'd be staying at their residence in one of the guest rooms."

Abelas nods and shows a slight smile. "That would be nice." Abelas ponders for a moment before continuing. "I can handle that. You have my word, but--There is something I should be up front about. Something I'm sure you'd like to know."

Cullen smirked and leaned back in his chair, "You have an ability as well?"

A shocked expression on Abelas' face. "How did you know?"

Cullen chuckled, "Izzie had a suspicion. Her gut instinct is usually correct."   
A smile and nod from Abelas as he got up and took a knife from the kitchen drawer, he walked back to the table, handing it to Cullen. "Strike me."

"What? Are you mad?"

Abelas straightened his posture, putting his hands behind his back. Firmly he spoke up, "Last time someone threw a punch at me I wasn't ready for it. I am now, and will be in the future should someone's life depend on it."

Cullen's eyebrows drew to a knit as he looked down at the knife and back at Abelas. "You're sure?"

Abelas smiled, "Yes."

Cullen took the knife in his hand and swiftly went for his shoulder. Just before the knife hit Abelas, his skin glowed with blue energy, encompassing his whole body. The knife in Cullen's hand seemed to bounce off the magical barrier, causing Cullen's arm to jerk back with it.

Cullen's face lit up in a range of emotions. Alarmed at first...Then amused, until a grin formed as he looked back at Abelas. The blue energy subsiding till it was only Abelas again. They shared an awkward pause and then a chuckle. "Now _that,_ is nice to know about."

Abelas stood upright with his hands behind his back. "I can extend the barrier to others within reach as well. As long as I'm near, you needn't worry about their safety."

Cullen happily reached his hand towards Abelas to shake it. "You've got the job friend."

Abelas took Cullen's hand giving it a firm handshake. "Ma Serannas, Cullen."  
.  
..

**3 Days Left**

  
Meredith's office isn't empty anymore. In fact it's definitely _not_ Meredith's old office anymore. Cullen takes in the new cabinets and nicer desk. The floors' picked up and swept. No loose papers. It's Knight Commander Cassandra's office now. Cullen stands with authority, his hands clasped behind his back as he gets to know Cassandra.

"I wasn't aware that many people new about Templars?" Cullen asks her.

Cassandra stands behind her desk and nods as she holds a cup of coffee in her hand. "I wanted to join the Templars when I was younger. I had family that was in Nevarra, but I was recruited by the Seekers. The duty of protecting others was a strong calling of mine since I was young."

"That's good. It's fortunate you knew what you wanted so young."

Cassandra tilts her chin up at his statement. "What made you want to be a Templar?"

"Same reason as you I suppose. Protect and serve. Hope to make a positive impact for the changes to come." It's a repetitive line, but it's not untrue.

Cassandra nods, "It is admirable to want to protect those who could be harmed in the process. I assure you that I will be as fair as I can be at the ground level." She pauses a moment, "I'm told Gaspard is cutting off communications outside the compound till news of the Circle is public knowledge. However, I'm happy to report that since open communication will be necessary between us that if there is ever an emergency, I can send you news personally. Is- there anyone important to you I should be aware of?"

Cullen takes a sharp inhale and lets it out slow and controlled. "No, Knight Commander, my family is in Ferelden, but I will let you know if I need to reach someone." She seems admirable but he can't afford to be wrong about her.

Cassandra nods and reaches her hand out. "I look forward to hearing about your progress in the Circle. Good luck, Commander Cullen."  
.

  
As he leaves the new Knight Commander's office, a hooded human passes him in the hall. A black shawl around her shoulders wraps to obscure some of her features, a few wisps of red hair grace her pale face as she steps into Cassandra's office.   
.  
The hooded woman addresses the Knight Commander, "His girlfriend could be instrumental. If my Crows are correct, she has healing abilities. "

Cassandra replies, "There has only been one case, we don't know if its contagious, a disease, a curse...We don't know. I don't want to cause panic."

"We don't know unless it spreads. Id like to see if she can-"

Cassandra interrupts the hooded woman, "Perhaps we will come to her in time. In the meantime we should keep an eye on her." A pause, "For Commander Cullen's peace of mind of course."

"Of course, but I'll have to remain distant. He's already hired someone to protect them. She is most certainly important to him."

"Indeed"  
.  
..  
...

Izzie runs her hand through his hair, his head on her lap in front of the fireplace, the motions

of her hand soothing, making his eyes tired.

"Cullen?"

"Hmm?"

"I know, you know I'm worried but-..."

"Sam, will be by tomorrow for Morrigan to meet him."

"Cullen..."

" That's right, he says you call him Abelas."

"Cullen..."

" Sorry, too much on my mind. I interrupted you."

She smiles as she turns his cheek so she can look in his eyes. She smooths her hand over his cheekbone and traces a line down his jaw, gently placing a finger on his lips. 

"Cullen...I'm so proud of you." The twinkle in her eyes warm.

Cullen takes her hand in his and tenderly kisses her palm. His smile is soft but a little sad. He remembers the first time she said those words. The last time they went fishing, right before he left for the first time. This is never easy; but her words mean everything to him.

"I'm going to miss you so much. I-...The Knight Commander told me if there was an emergency... That someone close to me could contact me if they needed through her. If you ever need me. Seek out Cassandra. I think she's good people I just- I didn't want her to know about you. Not yet."

"I understand." A pause and then a tease in her voice. "Wouldn't want anyone to know of Commander Cullen's Elven mistress, would we my love?"

Cullen smiled wide and let out a chuckle. He held her hand to his lips again placing a tender kiss on her knuckles. He paused as his face grew a little more serious. " I-...Someday you won't ever have to hide anymore...And they certainly will not be calling you my Elven mistress.

Izzie let out a small laugh. "Ahh mistress isn't so bad." She winks at Cullen.

He almost said it right there. _'Wife, would sound better.' No Cullen, it's too soon. Right? Maybe.._.Maybe it was just the right moment. When do you know when the time is right? What if he didn't get the right moment? _There's still time..._ Time. Always wanting more time with her. More moments...

He looked up at her and shook his head as he got up.

"Where are you going?" She asked. A small pout at the edge of her lips. He took her hand and pulled her off the couch to him.

He grinned wide before he kissed her forehead, his strong arms around her shoulders, holding her close. "To bed. Care to join me?"

Izzie let out a small laugh. She looked outside then back at Cullen. A flirtatious smile on her face. "It's a bit early."

Cullen pulled her closer, softly swaying back and forth. He looked outside the window behind them, over her shoulder, "Is it? Hmmm. That's- to bad." 

_Maker, I'm terrible at this..._

Izzie grinned as she let him sway back and forth with her, wishing they had a record player right now. She started to sink into his arms until she had a thought. "Cullen? There's a window in my room...The latch wont latch properly. I don't suppose you can fix it? There's a horrible draft it lets in."

Cullen smiled, " I noticed that last night actually. Pulled you closer to keep you warm- if you remember."

Izzie pulled back, a warm blush hitting her cheeks as she took his hand in hers, slowly pulling him backwards towards the stairs, "If you can't fix it...I hope you have another idea on how to keep me warm."

Cullen smiled wide as she pulled him up the stairs. " I- suppose I have another idea..."  
.  
..


	9. Dareth Shiral, Cullen Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NSFW Cullen and Izzie, Cole takes Izzie to Solas. Varric introduces himself. Solas ponders how much of a relationship he should encourage. Cullen makes another important decision.

He pulled her hips closer, pulling her to the edge of her desk she was sitting on _. I can't believe he broke the damn latch..._ Izzie giggled as a gust came through making her shiver and gasp as his hands made quick work of her blouse. Rough hands slid up over the peaks of her breasts as his tongue delved deeper past her lips. Breathless and careless, she heard a screwdriver fall to the floor. She managed a chuckle between kisses letting her speak. "You know it's really not fair--for-- _mmm_ \-- for how long it takes me-..."

" _Hmmm_ " Cullen hummed as he planted kisses against her collarbone.

"To get dressed in the morning--ahh-It takes you no time at all to- undress me."

Cullen pulled back sharply and raised an eyebrow at her, a wicked smile forming, "I can- go slower..." A soft kiss on her lips as he teased her. "If you'd like. I can take..." Cullen placed a long soft kiss on her neck, "-All... Night... Long." 

She watched his lips, his perfect mouth forming those teasing words, lighting a flame deep within her, heat rising through her chest as she arched her back. Her nails dug into the back of his neck as she pulled him hard against her. She didn't want him to take his time. He groaned low in his throat, smiling into her kiss. He pulled her off the desk, her legs firmly wrapped around him. His hands never left her skin as he set her down at the edge of her bed. He swiftly slid his hands to her trousers, undoing her belt with ease. As soon as she heard the thud she pulled him to the bed with her. He kissed her passionately as she pulled the collar of his shirt back exposing his neck. She dove for it, tracing a vein with her tongue giving it a light suction. Careful not to leave a mark.

The staggering rush of adrenaline she sent through him made him moan and scramble, pulling back to undo the first few buttons of his shirt before yanking it over his head. His frame coming down to wrap around her again. One arm around the small of her back as he pulled her further up the bed with him. 

The heat between them rose as he discarded the rest of their clothing, finally managing to lay bare with her. His hands dancing over her skin. The sound of her sighs awakening something feral within him. He gazed at her pale complexion, her dark wavy hair pooling around her head. Her blue eyes lowered, her lips parted. A wicked smile spread across his face as one arm came around the back of her head, his other hand squeezing and massaging her thigh. His lips came to her earlobe, softly teasing the outer shell with his tongue, making his way to the sharp point of her ear till he nibbled then whispered, " I love you.."

She shivered, "I love you too."

For years he craved her, hungered for this, he didn't want to let his lust overcome him. She deserved his full attention. He crept slowly down her body, stopping to place kisses down her abdomen. One hand softly sliding over her scars, the other lightly teasing the peak of her breast.

"Cullen?" She hadn't been shy about what she wanted in the past few days, but she hadn't done this with him yet. 

"Can I?" He asked as he placed a soft kiss above her pubic bone. He worried the built up energy would be sourerd if he wasn't good at this-but he wanted to please her, taste her. 

She smiled down at him, his warm eyes pleading. "Of course." 

He smiled back before he lowered his face between her legs. _Maker..._ She shivered beneath him, as she felt his breath hovering closer. Her hand softly came down to caress his scalp, weaving her hand through his curls. He slowly slid his tongue through her folds before he closed his lips around her sensitive bud, sucking gently, bringing his hand under her to lift her hips towards him.

White hot pleasure rolled through her body as he slid two fingers into her core. His pace slowly increased as he listened to her breathing. Taking cue from the sweet sounds she made. Her back arched, her toes curled. Her grip in his curls frantic till she gasped...

"Cullen!"

Her plea, his name on her sweet lips made him increase the intensity of his mouth, his tongue, his fingers. He devoured her till she suddenly stilled and then shook. Her vision was hazy. He let her come down gently, watching the waves of pleasure hit her made him smile as he kissed her hip bone. Her panting slowed as she found her voice again.

"Cullen," She begged. "Come here."

He silently obeyed as he made his way to her. His lips crashed against hers as his arms found their way to her sides. His previous carnal desires coming back with intensity. He easily slid into her. He struggled to find a natural rhythm as he thrust into her. She watched his eyes go dark, watched him struggle to keep his composure.

"Cullen, my love, you aren't going to break me. It's ok." He silently nodded and increased his speed and pressure. His groans and pleasure quickly mounting, finding its peak. He closed any remaining space between them, his teeth grazing her neck and her ear, his fingers dug into her thigh starting to hurt. "Izzie..." He groaned. She would never tire of hearing her name like that. Breathy and passionate. Cullen trembled and shook as his climax coursed through his body. Panting and leaving lazy kisses all over her. After a moment he carefully rolled over onto his side pulling her flushed against him.

He snaked his arm under her head, wrapping his other arm around her back as she pulled the covers over them. His lips coming down to her forehead. The slight aroma of sweat and their lovemaking filling the air. He was still catching his breath when he tilted her chin up to meet his eyes. 

"I didn't hurt you did I?"

"No, my side may be sensitive but I'm not that fragile." She smiled at him, her eyes beaming as she snuggled closer.

"Good, I was worried."

Izzie tucked her head under his chin, nuzzling into the crook of his neck as Cullen's arms tightened around her. His nose buried in the soft waves of her hair. He so badly wanted to commit this moment to memory. He breathed her in slowly and deeply, one hand softly caressing her shoulder, the other smoothing over the curves and dip of her back, his fingers lightly tracing circles into her back.

Softly like it was a secret, she whispered against his neck. "I think you should keep the coin. Take it with you. I know it's silly, but-"

Cullen pulled back and softly smiled at her, looking her in the eyes. She didn't look worried. He was relieved. He nudged her nose with his as his smile grew.

"Humor me?" She asked.

"Of course, my love..."  
.  
..  
...

Izzie stares up at the tall building in front of her, Abelas at her side. He offered to take her to meet Cole before he meets with Morrigan. They both stare at the building a moment. The Ritz hotel isn't a newer building or anything. It's just that she's never had a reason to come see it other than when they picked up Cullen's father and brother last week. It's not quite the tallest building in Val Royeaux, but it's close. Fifteen floors, a billiards on the third floor. The hotels' had a change of management about a year ago. Cole says he's a dwarf. Some wealthy businessman a part of the merchants guild. Cole appears beside her after a moment causing her to startle. _How is he always that quiet..._

"You made it." Cole's smile is just visible under his floppy hat. Abelas arms are crossed looking at the hotel, he nods to Cole before speaking his head cocked. "So this is where 'Elfroot man' lives? "

Cole chuckles ever so slightly. "Yes, but I think he prefers just Solas. You can come up and meet him, if you would like?"

Abelas shifts a moment, still taking in the tall building. "I'm sure I'll meet him soon if he's supplying Izzie with more Elfroot. " Abelas drops his arms as he turns to Izzie. "Perhaps you'll have him stop by sometime so I can meet him?" 

"Of course," Izzie smiles. "Thank you for walking with me."

Abelas nods, "I'm to go meet your sister. She's expecting me." 

Izzie grins and chuckles to herself as Abelas turns to walk away, "Good luck". She whispers to herself and Cole.   
.

A comforting wall of heat hits Izzie and Cole as they walk through the rotating door. Izzie takes in the dark hardwood floors covered by rich red carpet accented with Gold trim. A fireplace off to the side surrounded with many lounge chairs. There's a few desks with concierge, and a man behind a booth waiting on people, wanting to send telegrams. Cole takes Izzie's hand squeezing it gently, walking towards the Dwarf at the main desk. Izzie looks him over. Red jacket over a Golden vest, hair slicked back in a ponytail. A light stubble but not unprofessional. His Beaming grin comes around the counter, as they get closer.

"Cole! How's it going kid? I see you brought a friend?" The Dwarf motions to Izzie.

"Yes, Mr. Tethras, this is- Lady Isolde. She's here to see Solas."

He turns to Izzie "Pleased to meet you." He extends his hand to her and almost retracts it as he notices a missing hand at the end of her coat sleeve. Izzie fumbles with her other hand a moment, giving him a firm handshake. He nods politely. 

"Mr. Tethras' is too formal. Call me Varric." The Dwarf smiles at Izzie before turning to Cole. "Chuckles came down earlier this morning, in fact he's asked several times this week if you had come by with a guest yet. I'm guessing this is her?"

Unfazed by the Dwarf's comment, Cole responds, "Yes. Solas has extra Elfroot she can use."

"I'm an herbalist of sorts." Izzie replies.

"Ahh yeah, I don't often ask for arrangements with Elfroot... I know it has numerous uses though. " After a pause Varric nods, "It was nice to meet you Isolde."

Izzie smiles at the friendly dwarf. "You as well Varric."

Cole takes Izzie to the elevator, taking her to the top floor. Izzie looks at Cole and remembers what he said about Solas before.

"You weren't kidding about him having a view." Izzie comments.

Cole takes a moment to explain. "Varric lets him stay here. It's a small apartment, sort of. Solas makes flower arrangements for all the rooms. Varric says he thinks the flowers make the hotel feel extra fancy. Makes people write good reviews."

Izzie smiles. "Sounds like a convenient arrangement for them."

"Varric writes books too. He likes it when Solas proofreads for him."  
.

The elevator comes to a halt as they reach the top floor, the door opening to a short hallway that passes a suite and another door. He knocks on the door at the end of the hall.

_Tap, tap, tap!_

"It's open. Come in!"

Izzie's boots clack against the tile floor as she takes in the rooftop greenhouse. Massive glass walls traveling to a vaulted ceiling. One side of the room were tables and shelves scattered with colorful, potted flowers and various herbs. Izzie sighs and breathes in the pleasant aroma floating in the air, closing her eyes as she exhales. A smile growing on her face as she hums... _Fresh, floral air._

The plants reminded her of her own room but this was, so much more. _Quite impressive, especially in the dead of Winter..._ In the corner she spots a modest bed and nightstand. It's simple, but tasteful. 

Izzie smiles as her eyes travel to a Solas standing at a small outdoor table in the middle of the room, holding a teacup, steam coming off the top. He's wearing a beige collared dress shirt, simple black slacks held up by suspenders. Surprised that she ever thought he was homeless. He smiles back as she meets his gaze. 

"Cole! Izzie! It's good to see you. I wasn't sure when you'd be by." He motions to the metal pipes lining the corners of the glass ceiling. Hanging from twine strung from one corner to another was several bundles of Elfroot, already dried and waiting for her.

Izzie's face lights up in amazement. "You had this all ready for me?"

Solas fiddles with the teacup in his hands, setting it on the table. "Yes, I- wasn't sure when you'd come by. I thought I'd get a head start on the drying process for you."

It takes Izzie a moment to reply, glancing from the kind Elf to the flowers. "That was -very thoughtful of you. Thank you. That is so much." She pauses to think a moment. "I'll- I'll have to get more jars."

Solas lets out a small chuckle, "It's a small gesture really. I wish I could do more to return your kindness. "

Cole interjects, "You could show her how you do it. The plants. She's curious."

Izzie grins and averts her eyes a moment, she can feel the tips of her ears turning red.

Solas smiles and sets his cup on the table and motions to an empty pot nearest them. He reaches in his pocket for a cluster of small seeds placing them in the dirt. The expression on his face is calm as he closes his eyes and hovers his hand over it. It takes him a minute to concentrate, but after a moment the dirt starts to shift a little and a faint light blue energy radiates from his hand. She stares in amazement as a small start comes through. She smiles wide as she looks at him, still focused, her eyebrows questioning a moment before she looks down again. The sprout slowly twists and grows taller, then falls to the side, slowly travelling from it's center covering the surface of the pot in the smallest blue flowers...

He pulls his hand back as the blue magic radiating from his hand subsides, opening his eyes. 

"Myosotis, or Mouse Ears. But they are more commonly called-"

Izzie cuts him off and smiles. "Forget-Me-Nots."

"Yes, they cover the surface area of where they are planted. Varric is having me plant them in the planters outside the hotel in the Spring."

"They are lovely." She says as she gazes at the delicate flowers.

Solas smiles and tilts his head. _Yes, lovely..._ He realizes abruptly how close she was standing next to him. Almost shoulder to shoulder. It's the first time he notices the silver flecks in her blue eyes, the sparkle in her smile. The dark brown wisps of her hair framing her face under her wide brim hat. She looks pleased, happy. Her curiosity sated...

Cole broke the spell, forgetting he was there too. Cole had wandered to the edge of the rooftop garden.

"Izzie? Did you want to see the view?" Cole asks her.

Izzie turns to him and then Solas, "I'd love to."

The three of them walk to the edge. She'd been so distracted by the greenery to remember they were on a rooftop. She takes in the stunning view of the city. The hotel towering over most of the buildings. She peers over the edge, watching people come and go in the street. A carriage or two, a sign holder on the sidewalk holding an advertisement... Everything looks so small. Not sure she's ever been up this high before. It almost makes her dizzy. She looks out to the horizon, the overcast sky looking like it might snow again. She wonders what it looks like to watch it hit the glass. In the distance she spots the only other structure that might compete for a view. _Halamshiral_ , the Winter Palace. Several minutes pass until Solas' quiet voice, close behind her, pulls her from her thoughts...

"Almost feels like you're floating doesn't it?" He asks her.

"Almost." She grins as she lets her eyes wander over the tops of the other buildings.

Cole chimes in. "I like it. The birds like it up here too. Less people."

Solas nods as he walks over to a ladder propped against the brick wall next to his door. Cole helps him get the dried bundles of Elfroot down and puts them in a basket. As Solas hands her the basket he notices a small grimace on her face. 

"Is- something wrong?" he asks tentatively.

"Oh! Sorry no, I was just thinking--If it's no trouble. Do you have a Royal Elfroot start I could have? The bundles are wonderful, but I'd love to extract the oil from a live one." 

Solas smiles and nods, "Of course, I'd be happy to offer whatever I have. I was unaware of the extent of your apothecary knowledge. Extracting oils is not a process I am familiar with. You impress me."

_You impress me..._ The compliment echoed in her mind...There was something about him. His calm, studious gaze, his thoughtfulness. He seemed so... Genuine. She smiled brightly at his comment and wondered to herself a moment. _If he comes by the house then Abelas will meet him. Give Cullen peace of mind that 'Elfroot man' is harmless..._

There's a playfulness in her voice when she asks him. 

"Would you like to come by sometime and see? It's not a special 'ability' or anything like you can do, but I could teach you- if you'd like?"

He was frozen a moment, like time stood still. It was a simple gesture. A question. Innocent. He hadn't meant to continue their relationship other than helping her in this way. He'd caused her enough trauma in the first place. He had no right to be in her life. Or- suddenly want to be a part of it this much... But...

"I- Yes. I would like that." He answers with a subtle smile.

She smiles warmly, "Good, I look forward to it."  
.  
..  
...

Faline brings Morrigan her tea as she sits by the fireplace in her armchair. Abelas sits across from her in the middle of the sofa.

"You are not what I expected." He says plainly.

"What were you expecting?" As she sips her chamomile tea.

"I had assumed an Elf. You are her sister?"

Morrigan sarcastically responds, "I suppose my lack of Elven ears gave it away. Yes. We are adopted."

"Both of you?" His eyebrows raise ever so slightly.

"Well-Yes. I suppose... My mother never gave me a straight answer when I asked her about my heritage."

"Do you know anything about your father?"

"Personal questions...Curious are you? Very well. I suppose you'd like to know who you are 'protecting'..." The eyeroll she gave, gave him pause. 

Abelas nods after an awkward pause, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry or offend."

She pauses and softens, this man was simply here for a job. She didn't have to like it, but she didn't need to be rude either. "I'm sorry. T'was rude and unkind of me...I know you are here for Izzie not me. I thought you'd ask more about her." She clarified trying to smooth over her bite.

"Cullen mentioned you were uncomfortable with someone watching over you."

Morrigan shifts in her chair. He was blunt, straight to the point. She liked that. "Yes, It makes me anxious. That I should need protection implies a need for dependency. Tis a weakness, and I am _not_ some helpless woman."

Abelas smiles at that. It takes her by surprise. He hadn't shown much emotion all evening. It had unsettled her. Couldn't get a good read on him when Cullen had introduced him earlier that day. 

Abelas grins and nods. " I have not been under any assumptions that I am taking care of damsels in distress. I'll try not to hover."

Morrigan softly smiles and sips her tea. Silence filling the air again. She tries not to stare at him as he watches the fire in front of him. The glow of the fireplace in his golden eyes. He was not what she was expecting either. Izzie did not exaggerate when she said he was tall. She noted his long white hair, let down and hanging to the side. His brows, cheekbones, jawline was sharp, quite handsome, but he looked... _Out of place,_ she thought. He's terribly quiet aside from his questions. She supposes she rather his personal inquiries over him being an obnoxious noble or some merchant trying to act chummy with her. She grins and looks down at her tea, warm in her hands. Idle chit chat was just fine. A moment passes and she breaks the silence as she clears her throat.

"I believe perhaps, that my father was from a tribe of sorts." Choosing to answer his last question. 

Abelas interest once again peaked, "Was he part of an Elven tribe?"

"No, I don't think so. My mother told me about a Chasind man she had a foolish night with once in Ferelden. I've just assumed that was him."

Abelas nods and returns his gaze at the fire. She watches his face twinge a little and he lets out a heavy exhale. His words came slowly but with intention. "Cullen, told me about Izzie's... What happened a few years ago. Like I said, I have not been under the assumption that fragile, helpless women live here. --But I will be taking this job seriously. I understand that change is coming. From what I can ascertain I believe Commander Cullen is wise in taking precaution."

Morrigan nods, "Many fear change and may choose to fight it with every fiber of their being, Cullen believes this change is good. Change that may set people like you and Izzie free." She pauses a moment. "Faline can tell you more about Izzie's comings and goings. I am often travelling on business for periods of time. I don't spend as much time at home to know her routine."

"Understood." 

Morrigan stands and yawns, "I believe it's time I retire for the night."

Abelas stands at attention, his hands behind his back. "Is there anything you require this evening Lady Morrigan?"

His formality gave her pause. Not used to people giving her respect like that. She had to fight to earn respect normally. She admired his polite nature. She smiled gracefully and nodded in appreciation.

"No, that will be all. Goodnight Abelas."

Abelas nods as he watches her climb the stairs to her room. Faline peers from the kitchen, leaning against the frame. "Cullen says you prefer beer." She says.

Abelas turns and cocks his head questioningly. "Yes?"

Faline smiles and motions for him to follow her. He smiles appreciatively at the gesture as he makes his way to the kitchen.  
.  
..  
...

The breeze in the air sends a chill through Izzie as she grasps his collar closer to her. Cullen holds her tight against him, peppering tender kisses on her neck and collarbone, on the front steps of the house. His bags are on the ground, waiting for a carriage to come by to pick him up. He nestles his cheek against hers, before he pulls back and momentarily looks at her. His amber eyes searching, wandering. He gives her a coy smile before he cradles the back of her head in his hand, pulling her in for another passionate kiss. He pauses the kiss a moment and just smiles against her lips. Izzie feels his other hand move in her coat pocket. A soft huff escapes her mouth as she pulls back to look at him. Her eyebrows raise. 

"Damn it! Cullen I told you to take the coin with you this time." She fumbles for the coin he's placed in her pocket. "You need it more than I do." She pauses a moment as she freezes...Blood rushing to her face. Her fingers suddenly trembled. She looks down at what he's placed in her pocket. Her hand shakily coming up to hold a simple silver band.

Cullen's breath gets hitched as he looks at her. His heart in her hand. All the love radiating from his amber eyes. "I - Izzie, I'm- sorry you can't wear it on your left hand,- but would you- "

She looks up at him, smiling as hot tears roll down her face. "Yes, I would, I- Will." She claims his perfect lips, as he smiles against hers. His fingers tremble as he pauses to take her hand in his placing the ring on her finger. He holds her fingers in his hands kissing the tips of each finger. Her palm coming up to cup his jaw as she slates her mouth over his again. His arms wrapping around her as her tears pool together on his cheek. After a few moments Cullen pulls back to look at her glassy eyes. His words spill over, tumbling. Too much and not enough. 

"Izzie, I know we've just- reconnected, and I know you said I'm yours. But-I just couldn't wait any longer. I love you. I wanted- needed, you to know how much." His brow comes down to hers as his eyes mist.

The tear induced gravel in Izzie's throat making her confession even more endearing. "Cullen, I never had any doubt you loved me." She laughs heartily through tears, "But this certainly doesn't hurt." She jokes as he kisses her fingers in his hands. " I love you...My tall Oak tree."

Cullen chuckles as he kisses her forehead. "Be safe my Sparrow."  
.  
..  
...  
....


	10. New Friends and New Beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzie spends time talking about the fade to Solas and shares a drink with Abelas.

The following week, Izzie goes about her normal routine with more glee in every step. Abelas takes her to town to get the necessary vials, jars, and tins to fill with her abundance of Elfroot. The new Royal Elfroot sits on her window sill. She hums as she breathes its more aromatic scent than her usual variety. She smiles at her new addition and gently plays with one of the blue leaves, her eyes wandering as she takes a moment to look at the silver ring on her finger. Her beaming smile she can't contain...

Faline had pressed her for all the details and shared in her joy. Abelas gave her a simple nod and ' _Congratulations_ ' while Morrigan smiled wide behind her cup of coffee. She misses him already, but for the first time in a long time, she's excited about the future. For the first time it hits her, _she has certainty in her life._

She's working the Elfroot with her mortar and pestle as best she can, when she hears a pair of footsteps coming up the stairs. She hears Abelas voice first.

"Izzie?"

She turns to smile at him in her doorway. He looks like he's about to say something as Cole comes right behind him. 

"Uh- Cole is here to see you. I was- going to tell him I'd come get you..." Abelas awkwardly explains as Cole slides his way into Izzie's room past Abelas. 

"It's okay Abelas, Cole's is family." She grins and winks at both of them but takes note of Cole's odd urgency. Cole looks at her and then her desk. Her pile of Elfroot she's barely made a dent in. Cole's words came out a little hurried.

"He was supposed to stop by today. Wanted to help you with the Elfroot. Learn about- He meant to- but the Watchmen. They- are still looking for him."

Izzie lets out a heavy exhale and nods. "It's ok Cole. I understand. Everything is okay though right? " Anxiety creeps in as she reminds herself that Cole sometimes just talks with a sense of urgency.

"Yes, he just didn't want you to think he forgot about you. He found a book on Crystal Grace for you. Wants to know if you'd like it. " Cole says more relaxed.

Izzie gives Cole a light smile. She feels a familiar muscle spasm in her shoulders from working the Elfroot. _Break would be nice._ She pauses to stretch her arms and twist her wrist making a popping sound. "I can stop by after lunch. I'd love to take a break." 

Abelas interjects non- chalantly. "I'd like to meet this 'Solas'. "

Izzie smiles. "Of course."

.

..

...

Izzie and Abelas make their way to the rooftop. As she gets to Solas' door she knocks and waits a moment. She looks down at the doorknob and notices it's not shut all the way. She calls out.

"Solas? Your door is open?" She pauses and waits for a response. When she doesn't get one, she worries... _Could the Watchmen have shown up??_ She slowly opens the door to see him leaning back in a chair at his table in the middle of the room, his eyes closed. 

Abelas peers in with her. "Sleeping? In the middle of the day?"

Izzie shrugs.

"Solas?" She makes her way to him, Abelas close behind her, as she tries to gently wake him, lightly tapping his shoulder. No response...She checks his pulse.

"His breathing is shallow. Why is it so shallow?" Izzie says as she waves her healing magic over him, checking to see if somethings wrong. After a moment he abruptly inhales and wakes causing her to startle. A curious expression rises on Abelas face.

"Solas, are you all right?" Concern in her voice.

"Yes," He replies, as he rubs his eyes, coming back to the waking world. He smiles, pleasantly surprised to see her. "My apologies, sometimes I forget where I am and don't pull myself out for a while." Abelas quietly stands next to her. Solas' looks at him questioningly, unsure who this visitor is. Abelas' arms crossed. Solas takes note of his almost suspicious glare at him.

"Solas, this is Abelas-he uh-."

Abelas continues for her. "I take Lady Isolde where she needs to go." His formal greeting is very dry as he looks Solas up and down. 

Not wanting to offend but seeking clarification, Solas asks as he sits up in his chair. "You are her assistant? I've come to understand she runs an apothecary out of her home."

"Something like that." Abelas nods, another over simplification. He didn't need to explain himself, he thought... But then...His stern expression barely softening as a hint of sudden realization sweeps through him. He can feel an odd energy emitting from him, or perhaps better a lack of energy. Only someone from his time would catch it. It's almost audible, like an echo. He can sense an...Emptiness, a void where once there was more. 

A sadness washes over Abelas. When the veil was raised, magic became harder to weild. It required more focus and stamina to summon magic from the fade. As the centuries went on, magic became...Different. Every time he would wake to protect the Vir' Abelasan, his magic would prove more and more unreliable. A side effect of the veil strengthening over time. The only 'reliable' spell he could summon being his barrier. It made sense his proficiency with that would stay. He had always played a protective role throughout his life. _Elvenhan..._ He wants to talk to this Elf. Wants to ask if there are others. He thinks about how to address this. Aware that no one knows he's ancient, and immortal. Wonders if this Solas can tell. His thoughts and questions flood his mind. It takes him a moment to remember why he is here, as he continues the conversation.

"It's my understanding you are Lady Isolde's new Elfroot supplier?" Abelas asks, dropping his arms to his sides, trying to make small talk.

"Yes, and anything else she requires of me." Solas says with a smile before he motions to the other herbs on the tables. "I owe her a great debt." He smiles at her as he leans back in his chair again.

Heat rises through Izzie's chest. The warmth in his voice. The sincerity and gratitude in his eyes as he looks up at her. She smiles at him. _What do I say to that?_ It's too long of a pause she realizes, she's caught up in his gaze and he in hers. 

Not wanting to intrude or overstay, Abelas gently rests his hand on the small of her back and leans down a little. 

"I'll- be downstairs when you're ready to go."

Izzie turns to Abelas, "There's a billiards on the 3rd floor. We could get a drink? Meet you there?"

Abelas politely nods and excuses himself. "It was nice to meet you, Solas."

Solas nods back, "You as well."

.

They watch Abelas leave. After a moment Izzie takes off her wide brim hat, setting it on the table, loose waves frame her face. She breaks the silence, turning to face Solas again, her brows slightly furrowed. "What do you mean pull yourself out? I thought something was wrong. You left your door open." She gestures to the door.

He pauses and looks at the door, a light smile hoping it helps. "I didn't mean to cause you alarm. I was just closing my eyes a moment. Drifted farther into the fade than I intended to. The door was left open for Cole. He wakes me up usually."

"You- went to the fade?" Amusement on her face. Surely he didn't actually think he could-...

"Precisely." Casual and confident. 

She gives him a raised eyebrow and cocks her head, her disbelief prompting him to explain further. Solas takes a deep inhale, letting out a slow exhale. Grin growing in the corner of his mouth. 

"Magic users such as yourself tap into the fade to cast magic do you not? This is simply another way to access it. Although- I- know it's not that simple. It can take years of dedication and focus.”

She stares at him a while till he stands up. He would love to have this conversation of course. Just...Not sure how to go about it. He walks toward the edge of the rooftop as he looks at the sky. She follows him, curious but her browline remains furrowed...

"What color is the sky?" He asks as he looks back at her. "I promise it's a serious question." He smiles softly at her.

"Blue" She replies confidently, without hesitation.

He nods. "The ancient elves called the act of creating the Veil 'holding back the sky'. Look past that, when you focus on it. Do you feel a pull? Does it- draw you in sometimes."

She ponders his questions a moment... _Okay, I'll play his game..._ She takes a moment and gazes at the sky through the glass roof. It's an overcast day really. Not exactly blue...She takes a minute to focus on it...

"It's almost,- greenish I suppose, endless, kind of. I don't know if it makes sense but sometimes at night when I look at the stars I feel like I'm floating, or maybe falling?"

Solas' smile widens at her thoughtful answer. "It's a fairly common response to feel the falling sensation. Years ago when Dwarves only resided in the Deep Roads, they would commonly believe that if they went outside they would 'fall into the sky'. A similar feeling I imagine."

Izzie challenged his statement with an observation. Studious look on her face. "Dwarves don't dream though?"

"True, although I do believe that it's possible they can be inspired by the fade somehow. If there were no dreams, where would inspiration come from?"

She shrugs. "Art, music, the world around us?"

"Certainly a valid explanation." He smiles at her intuitive responses. His eyes wandering, wondering. She's been looking at him with intensity. The gears in her mind turn like a clock about to wind up.

She lets out a small huff. " So...What do you see in the fade then?"

If he could smile any wider, he might break his face. His heart swells in his chest. Even though she was clearly skeptical, he had hoped she would ask him. 

"You've noticed I have access to more than one ability. I've discovered various forms of magic on my own, from my deepest journeys in the fade." He turns to gaze at the sky and take a few steps back, giving her space. 

If she could cross her arms she would. She ponders a moment. _He_ **_does_ ** _have access to more magic than anyone else she's ever met. He certainly seems genuine..._ The implications send her mind reeling. The small scowl on her face disappears and her expressions soften. Cullen's voice echoes in her mind _. "What if you could do more?"_ What if she could help more people?

He's standing by one of his potted plants, eyes closed, faint blue magic coming from his fingers as he encourages the sprout to grow. Izzie watches him till his magic subsides, she glides over to him as he opens his eyes, taking his shoulder and turning him towards her softly...

"Can- can you show me? Is it safe?"

"No, it is not safe." Struggling to conceal the grin tugging at the corner of his mouth. "But I can assure you. I would let no harm come to you."

She feels heat rise to her face as he closes the distance between them on the rooftop, leaving less than an arm’s width apart. His hands clasp behind his back as he stands upright. Almost making himself appear taller. His close proximity sends goosebumps down her arms. Izzie shuffles, shifting her weight in her legs before she makes sure she's standing up right, feet planted firmly, tilting her chin up to mirror his stance. This was not a simple request, but her curiosity was piqued.

Soft, seriousness in his eyes. She couldn't possibly know the depth of hesitation she gave him. He looked for one reason. Just one reason not to whisk her away to the fade with him. Not to give into her curiosity. Her blue eyes sharp, pinning him in place, challenging him, she wanted proof of his ability _. A push..just a push...She could be so much more...If she just got a taste...Perhaps...She could turn away_... But if he doesn't push, she may never...

.

"Izzie" He says softly. "What you ask. In order for me to take you there...I would require your trust. "

To his surprise she doesn't budge... He leaves room for her to comment before he continues. The pause giving him time to come up with how to explain. He walks to his table and motions for her to sit, taking her hat off the table and placing on a hook near the front door.

"I- I don't have tastes for tea or coffee. Would you like cocoa?" He asks her, taking two teacups off of a shelf above a small pellet stove.

She looks over to him and smiles, "That would be lovely, thank you."

As he heats water in a teapot, he shakes his head to himself, struggling to come up with how to proceed. He winces a little before he speaks. His back turned as to not see her facial expression. "Are you familiar with hypnotism?" 

"Yes." She says questioningly, unsure where he was going with this. He turns to face her leaning back on the small table against the wall.

"Hypnotism is a form of placing someone in a sleep like state with a verbal component. Similarly to lucid dreaming. However it's not always effective if the subject is...Skeptical, of the outcome."

Izzie gives a wary look and leans back in her chair. He sees her posture change. "I would not be hypnotizing you against your will. It's not like that. I would be asking for your consent however." He says as he pours her cocoa, handing it to her, taking his seat across from her.

The thought of 'hypnotism' put her on edge, but his sincerity made her want to hear him out. _She did ask him if this was possible after all._

Izzie shrugs and takes a sip, letting out a small scoff. "I've always assumed hypnotism was like a card trick. Just needing a staged audience member."

Solas nods, his worry that she might turn and run subsiding. "You are correct to suspect duplicity. I hear that is often the case. That being said, what I can do is different and referred to as a 'suggestion spell' requiring a verbal and...Physical component. Like hypnotism, when used effectively can put someone in a state of suggestion, it can be used to treat anxiety, stress, sleeping problems, even help people confront their fears or phobias. It has other applications. It would allow me to take you to the fade with me."

"So the fade is like a lucid dream?" Her brows knit in her confusion.

Solas smiles and chuckles. "Yes, but it is much more than that. Much more vivid. It's easy to get lost in. That's why I wouldn't let you go by yourself. You would need my help to "pull yourself out" of the Fade.”

Izzie's face changes at the connection between him and Cole. Her furrowed brow softening.

"That's why you left the door open? Someone to wake you up, ‘pull you out.’ You knew Cole would be by later."

"I did." He smiles finally, happy his explanation didn't trouble her. 

She pauses and looks down, thinking, before she meets his gaze again. She gives an awkward grin and cocks her head towards him, watching him."Sooo verbal and _physical_ component?" 

_Fenedhis_..He almost drops his teacup at her playful sounding question. He stumbles through his words, feeling the tips of his ears burn. " I- Well- Yes, It's a gesture mostly, small pressure at your temples." He fumbles setting the tea cup down, motioning with his fingertips placing them on either side of his own temples to demonstrate. "Not unlike transfering your healing ability to another person." 

She smiles, blush creeping up her cheeks. She remembers healing the cut on his lips. The smallest hint of a smile when she did it. She wonders if he was dreaming. He had passed out promptly after she set his bone back in place. She shakes her head to herself, trying to hide a grin. It takes her a moment to remember why she was here in the first place.

He pauses a moment trying to gauge her reaction. A little pensive. "I-I- do not wish to make you uncomfortable. If you'd like Abelas to be here-"

She smiles behind her teacup.

"Some other time perhaps." He has yet- to truly make her uncomfortable. If anything it was him who seemed uncomfortable. She pauses. She hopes she read him well enough to tell this was a hard thing to explain. She takes a deep breath and changes the subject as she continues. "Uh- Cole said you had a book for me?"

"Ahh, yes." He walks to the corner of the room to his bed, taking the book out of his nightstand, coming back to place it in her hand. She stretches her hand out to take it, only taking him moment to take note of the ring on her hand. He smiles and meets her eyes. "I believe Congratulations are in order. Cole mentioned your recent engagement."

She looks at her hand and motions for him to see it. 

"Yes, thank you. It was quite the surprise." She says as she smiles wide. There's an awkward pause as she shuffles to stand up. "I- should get going." She says hesitantly, almost looking for an excuse to stay. She looks down a moment before she looks him in the eyes. She starts to turn towards the door as he gets up and takes a few steps towards her, she turns to face him. 

"Solas?"

"Yes?" 

"I enjoy talking to you." A pause, "Thank you for the book, and the cocoa." She smiles warmly at him.

He returns her smile, "You're welcome. I enjoy your company as well. It- has been sometime since...Since I have been comfortable talking to anyone about-..." His voice trails off as he can't find the words. 

Izzie steps closer, lightly nudging her hand against his. The book she gave him in her hand. Quietly she smiled and nodded "I understand." 

Her warm smile made his chest tight. She couldn't truly understand. But...She knew as well as him that magic could be a touchy subject. Fear if the wrong person knew about it, that it could be used against them. Fear that their 'gift' could cause alarm or panic to someone, even told in confidence. It was a risk he took. A similar, albeit more personal risk when she took him in and healed him. He nodded and let out a relieved sigh. 

"Thank you."

"Of course," She paused, her eyes searching, wandering from the ground, to the flowers, and back to him. "Perhaps we can continue our discussion? About the fade? I--you gave me more Elfroot than I'm used to working with. I've hardly made a dent." She rotates her left shoulder, the muscles still tight. Slight grin and blush rising to her cheeks. Hoping he'd take the bait...

"I- could help you with that. If you'd like? I believe you said you'd show me how you extract oil as well. I would be happy to continue our discussion." 

Victorious smile on her face. "See you sometime this week?"

"Yes." He smiles as she turns to leave, forgetting her hat until she feels Solas' hand on her shoulder gently turn her. He lightly chuckles as he places her hat back on her head for her, as her hand is full. He feels a strange desire to tuck her stray hairs behind her ears but stops himself. "Thank you." She smiles awkwardly and heads downstairs.

.

..

...

As she travels in the elevator to meet Abelas, she thinks about Solas. One odd detail about her encounters with him rises to the surface. Surprised she didn't notice it before. She's commented about his gifts, his abilities, and he about hers. His eyes almost never leave hers...But there's a detail that everyone will eventually point out. He's certainly not blind. But she can't help but wonder. _Why hasn't he asked about my arm?_ It's not as if she wanted him to ask or wanted to talk about it even. _Maybe he's just being polite?_ She shrugs as she steps onto the 3rd floor to meet Abelas. 

.

The 3rd floor is surprisingly more classy than she thought. She takes note of the patrons around the bar, the pool tables and dart board. Almost all of them are human and male. _Boys club.._.She shrugs to herself as she scans the room. She spots Abelas in a high back chair at a taller table, leaning forward with hands folded, watching a couple of business men in suits smoke and take shots at a pool table. She glides over and sits next to him. He eyes her and smiles softly. They sit and watch for a moment before Izzie nudges his leg with her knee. 

"I've never been in a establishment like this before."

Abelas looks over to her, dryly he replies, "Me neither."

Izzie grins as she lightly nudges him again. "Have you figured out the rules?" She casually gestures to the men in suits playing pool.

"I believe so. There does not seem to be much strategy to it."

He seems...distant. Like there's something on his mind _...Or maybe that's just how he is_ ? She looks around a moment at all the patrons, drinks in hand. It's not terribly busy. About twenty or so people casually mingling. She sees the elevator door open and watches Varric step out. Immediately recognizing her, giving her a smile and nod from across the room. She's not ready to go home. She smiles to herself, _it's nice to get out._ She looks at Abelas again. Stern look on his face, studying the men at the pool table she thinks. 

After a few minutes the gentlemen leave and Izzie nudges Abelas again. "Wanna see if we can figure it out?"

Abelas startles a little, lost in thought. He clears his throat, " Apologies, I-" Before he can finish, Varric walks over to their table.

"Where are my manners Lady Isolde, has no one come by to get you and your friend drinks yet?"

She smiles at Varric, "This is Abelas." She gestures her hand toward him. "We hadn't decided if we wanted to play pool yet."

Varric takes a quick look at Abelas _. Guy looks like he's wound tight or something_. He looks back at Izzie. "First rounds on me. It'll help you warm up." He gives them a wink.

Izzie nudges Abelas playfully again. He sighs and gives her a more genuine smile this time. "Drink would be nice."

Varric gets Abelas a beer and Izzie a glass of white wine as they practice taking shots. Abelas is grateful for her company. Her kind and considerate nature in trying to get him to relax a little. Neither of them are any good at pool, agreeing to try darts next time. _Next time_ , Abelas smiles to himself. They share another drink and make small talk before they decide to go home.

The snow on the ground has started to melt in the last few days, but it's still quite cold out. Izzie watches as Abelas shivers, trying to pull his coat around himself more. Still the same blue reefer coat that's too small on him. Abelas winces as the cold air bites at his cheeks.

"So...This Solas has multiple abilities?" Abelas asks.

"Yes, it seems so."

"Cullen told me of his,- what did he call it... shockwave or- tremors he can summon."

Izzie nods as they walk along the sidewalk. "Yes, he's got quite the green thumb as well. It's fascinating." She decides not to mention their talk about the fade or his 'suggestion' ability.

Abelas hums in agreement. 

"You said he'd come by this week?"

She nods as she watches Ablelas shiver again. It's not terribly late, the sun's not too low, and Faline might not have started dinner yet. She glances around and sees an open sign in a nearby shop. She loops her arm through Abelas' as he looks down at her curiously. 

"Come, I want to look for a new pair of warmer socks. You look like you could use a new jacket. My treat? I really appreciate you taking me into town today."

He smiles down at her through his lightly chattering teeth and nods. " Lead the way."

Izzie smiles to herself. _Today was a good day...._

.

..

...


	11. I Trust You...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Abelas and Morrigan chat. Solas helps Izzie with her Elfroot salves. Abelas gets a chance to talk to Solas.

Abelas is in his room organizing his armoire. He carefully folds each collared shirt and pair of slacks. His fingers methodically smoothing out every wrinkle. Cullen had given him an advance to get himself new clothes, Izzie had insisted last night he needed a better coat as well. He's grateful for their kindness, the opportunities he's had since his chance encounter with Cullen. He has a job, a home, a purpose again. He's even found an Elf like him. Not that he's been able to address that yet, but he's hopeful Solas will be by soon. 

Finishing folding his clothes, Abelas stands in his doorway a moment. He can hear Izzie down the hall, the faint sound of the glass jars as she places them on her desk. The soft muffle of her curse under her breath as she struggles with the Elfroot. He hears her huff, and then her bare feet slap against the hardwood floors, as she makes her way downstairs for more coffee. He hears Faline's clack of her shoes downstairs, and the bristles on the broom as she sweeps. He's grown accustomed to these sounds already. It gives him some semblance of comfort, familiarity. Nice to have routine in his life...

_Thud.....Thud....Thud...._

His ears twitch, as he looks down the opposite end of the hall. Morrigan's door is closed, as per the usual, but the "study" is open. He makes his way down the hall, the sound he thinks of books hitting the ground. Morrigan had come home late last night from a trip to meet a businessman with potential for an investment opportunity. He watches her from the doorway a moment before he knocks. Morrigan is standing on a ladder in front of the bookshelves that line the back wall, nearly reaching the ceiling. Her raven hair in its usual messy bun, figure fitting black blouse and maroon skirt. She flips through one book and then another, throwing each one into one of two boxes on the floor. Her hazel eyes stay trained on the book in her hands as she speaks.

"Good morning Abelas. Sleep well?" She flips through the book casually.

"Yes, thank you. How did your meeting go? With thee uh-"

"Inventor of sorts." She replies dryly, "Hoping to sell me on his idea of lyrium powered pocket watches."

Confusion on his face as he asks, "Lyrium use and distribution is heavily regulated by the Crown? How would he gain--Oh..."

Morrigan nods and hums, a wicked grin rising to her face. "The Crown may regulate it, but I have more control over it than even the King. T'was my mother's job before mine." A loaded sigh escapes her as Abelas crosses the room, looking into the boxes of books on the ground. 

"Your mother kept quite the collection of books I see."

"Yes, unfortunately not all of them are useful or relevant to me anymore."  
Abelas kneels down and picks one out of a box. _Elven literature, Elven poetry, a book on magical theory..._ He flips through a moment before putting them back in the box. Morrigan motions to the other box.

"These ones I'd like to keep. I'm consolidating her collection."

Abelas moves to the other box picking up a few books. _Elven lore and history._ These books are- _different_. Loose notes and papers line the insides of the book pages. There's scribbles and text scratched out on all the pages. At first he thought her mother must have been editing them for grammatical errors, until he notices she is actually correcting historical inaccuracies. 

"Your mother was very interested in Elven culture it seems?"

"Yes, humans have their history written on paper, or chantry texts. Dwarves have theirs written in stone, but neither race is as old as Elvhen. Their history is much more rich and vibrant but...mostly lost..." 

She pauses, gauging his reaction. His head tilted up to meet her eyes. She steps down from the ladder and continues, tossing another book into the 'keep' box.

"My mother thought it a terrible injustice, that after the veil was lifted, knowledge of where Elves came from and their true history t'was lost. Elves may be treated like a minority but in truth they make up almost forty percent of the population. Flemeth thought it imperative that people should learn where they come from." She pauses and scoffs, "An Irony that is not lost on me, as she would neither confirm nor deny that she was my mother."

Abelas listens, as he flips through the books some more, he comes across a smaller book, a- grimoire of sorts. Morrigan moves to stand next to him, close enough to breathe in the subtle trace of mint coming from his freshly washed white hair. She grins before looking over his shoulder, standing on her toes."Ahh, spell book I believe, not that it's useful anymore since magic has changed in the thousands of years since the fall of Elvhen empire." 

Abelas sighs as he flips through, "I presume the ritual spells in here are terribly unreliable, in addition to being illegal."

She nods as Abelas picks up a journal with an illustration similar to Mythal's vallaslin on the cover. Morrigan comments, "I have assumed the picture on the cover is ' _Vhenadahl_ '. I'm certain my pronunciation is terrible but I believe it is roughly translated to _'Tree of the People_ '."

Abelas smiles at her thoughtful conclusion. The connection she's made is not incorrect. Mythal had been a 'mother to her people'. She protected and cared for the Elvhen people, the best of the Evanuris. He opens the book to see several pages have been torn out. 

"What happened to this book?" Concern in his voice and brow.

Morrigan shrugs, "I don't know. Many of my mothers journals made no sense to me. I can assure you t’was not I who ripped those pages out. Flemeth was a secretive woman. I'd love to know what in the void she could possibly be hiding. " She seems unconcerned as Abelas gives a puzzling look at a loose sketch in the back of the journal. It's a necklace or amulet of sorts, very ornate. Abelas thumbs over a small note on the bottom of the page written in Elven.  
Morrigan chimes in. "I had Izzie help me with the translation here, something about a lock or-protection spell?" 

Abelas nods, "It's reminiscent of what I understand to be an amulet of power. This one however is much more unique. It holds an Evanuris' essence. A piece of them in case they ever found themselves in a near fatal state. These amulets gave the wearer a - second chance. " 

Morrigan's looks at him suspicious at first, but as he continues, she softly smiles. A pleasant surprise to her that he knows something about the amulet. 

Abelas continues, "Several Evanuris had one. Well- except for Fen'harel. These amulets required a blood magic ritual. Fen'harel wasn't opposed to using blood magic himself, but he argued that, while one could be strong in blood magic rituals, it would make summoning the magic of the fade more difficult."

Suspicion in her voice but smirk on her lips. "Interesting...Pray tell how _did_ you come upon such knowledge?"

 _Fenedhis._.. He scolds himself, trying to come up with a convincing lie. "I believe I saw a similar drawing- in a book... in a library..." Her eyes level with his, looking for deception. Her browline softens and she lets out a sigh, tilting her chin up to him, grin tugging at the corner of her lips. Her hazel eyes twinkling in the corner.

"I -have some time before I have to catch the train to Orzammar, there's a library on the way- If you'd like to-. " She huffs lightly and crosses her arms, "-Not that I don't believe you, It's just hard to believe there is a book on Elven history I don't own." 

Abelas smiles ever so slightly. "I'd be happy to get out for a bit, Lady Morrigan. Shall we?" He gestures his hand for her to lead the way...  
.  
..  
Izzie hears them leave, Faline passes them on the stairs on her way to Izzie. "Cole is here, we are going to go to the market for dinner tonight. Says Solas is on his way."

Izzie turns to Faline in the doorway, "Thank you."  
.  
Izzie pours herself another cup of cocoa as she hears the knock at the door.  
 _Tap tap tap!_

“It’s open!” She calls out. She grabs another mug for Solas as she smiles to herself. She hears him round the corner into the kitchen.

“And you thought **_I_** was strange for leaving my door unlocked.” He teases her lightly as he takes off his green corduroy jacket, setting it on the back of a kitchen chair before he takes the hot beverage.

"Thank you." The mug warms his cold hands.

"You're Welcome- and I knew you were coming." The hint of sass in her voice makes him smile as she leads him up the stairs to her bedroom. She's eager to continue their conversation about the fade, his dreams, and the possibility of learning new abilities. _Of course she’s also glad he’s here to help her with the enormous amount of Elfroot he gave her._ Getting to ask him about the fade is just an enjoyable _side benefit._

"Yesterday you said you've discovered various forms of magic in the fade. I'd like to know more about that. '' She says as they climb the stairs.

 _Not wasting any time I see.._.. His grin only growing wider. "Yes, I have met various spirits over the years that have knowledge of different spells or gifts. I talk with them, mimic their hand motions and learn new incantations from them in the fade." 

He pauses as they reach the top of the stairs. "When I wake up, I practice those same rhythms. Eventually- it becomes more natural, as easy as breathing, the more you practice. 

She huffs a little as he follows her to her desk. "Learning a new ability does not sound 'as easy as breathing'"

He chuckles, "No, I suppose not."

He pauses to take a sip of cocoa. A brief look of distaste at the drink, hoping she didn't notice. _It's not as sweet as he likes it._ He looks at her desk, eyeing the various jars and tins, the abundance of Elfroot hanging from twine above them. 

She's looking into her cup, steam rising off the top, deep in thought. Taking in every word he says, trying to make sense of it. 

He sips his drink before he sets it on her desk, turning to her as he clears his throat. "Izzie, do you remember when you healed me?"

"How could I forget?" She says with a smile, looking up at him from her mug. It tugs his heart the way she says it. He continues.

"You remember focusing your ability on the broken bone?- and when you weren't sure how to set it-"

"You pushed it back into place for me." She sets her mug down and reaches for her mortar and pestle. 

"Yes, but when you reached out for your magic- could you feel the bone was back in its place? Back where it should be?"

Izzie thinks a moment, "Yes, I could tell I had healed you enough to stabilize you. Although you left the next morning before I could--re- examine you. Check to see if there was anything else I could do." She says, before awkwardly clearing her throat.

He looks up and starts untangling a sprig of Elfroot from the twine above them. His beige sweater riding up enough for her to almost peak at his ribcage. She knows he's probably fine...Well he is _fine._.. Blush creeping up her cheeks as her eyes are drawn to his bare stomach, before she hides her face behind her mug. He shows her the sprig and she nods in approval before she offers him the small mallet and watches as he grinds the Elfroot into a powder. 

He hadn't wanted to overstay. He smiles and nods as he continues, "Theoretically, If you had to do that again. Do you think you would be able to put it back in place on your own?"

Izzie scoffs lightly and chuckles as she takes a cup of water and slowly pours a little into the bowl, "I think I should look at an anatomy book first before I try that again."

He chuckles, "Perhaps...but when you reached out, - that feeling of summoning magic, that pull, that draw from the fade. --I believe it is possible for you to expand on the ability you already know."  
She raises an eyebrow. "I hope you aren't suggesting you break a rib again to show me?"

He grins, "No." 

Izzie inhales deeply, letting it out slowly, her fingers gently tap on the desk. She's staring at him intently.

"That- feeling you mentioned-I think I know what you're talking about. " He gestures to show her the paste of Elfroot, she nods in approval and points to a vial of lavender oil. He hands it to her as she adds some to the paste as she continues…

"That draw, or pull...I've described that feeling to Cullen before. He always called it 'a gut instinct', but- I've suspected it's more than that. I-". She pauses as Solas stops to look at her. No sour expression, no hint of disbelief in his eyes… _Perhaps she can trust him?_

Izzie continues, "There's- been a few instances where I've been able to tell that someone is 'gifted'. I don't always need to touch them. Sometimes it's just a...feeling I guess."

He smiles knowingly. He had been able to tell immediately that the man that came with her, Abelas, was not an assistant. There was something more to him as well. 

"It may be more common than you realise to be able to sense that someone else may be--more..." A warm smile spreads across his face. _She is so much more..._

Izzie is quietly lost in thought as she gets a jar from her desk drawer for the finished Elfroot salve. He takes another sprig down from the twine and Izzie sits and watches him again. It takes him no time at all to duplicate the salve as she gets another jar for him. He thinks about how much time this must take her by herself. She clearly takes pride in her work and loves helping people. Wants to make a difference in this world. He smiles a little sadly as he lets himself gaze at her left arm. He hadn't really avoided it. Just hurts to remember that day. The power that destroyed her arm had to have gone somewhere. It destroyed so much and yet left her alive. Solas imagines that without it attached...anchored...to someone...That it surely could have done more damage. The power built up over two millennia should have caused a much bigger explosion…

He shakes his head... She must have absorbed it. _He certainly didn't._

Izzie shuffles in her chair a moment and clears her throat. "Thank you for indulging me with my questions. I know you said you- haven't always felt comfortable talking about it. Can I ask why?"

He looks at her, softly but seriously, "You are aware I could be locked up tight if it was discovered I was--. I'm sure the Crown would rather not have someone like me exist."

She smiles softly at him as his eyes wander the floor. His down turned gaze makes her heart ache for him. "I understand." She pauses as he meets her eyes, she continues. "If it helps, I- wouldn't let them take you."

He chuckles lightly. "I'm not sure that would be wise... I wouldn't want to put you in danger on my behalf."

She grins at him, "I believe I've already taken that chance."

She's right of course. She had taken him in and hid him, as well as healed him. And when the Watchmen asked...She didn't hesitate…

After a moment he smiles back. "My apologies, you are correct. I only mean that I wouldn't want harm to come to you."

His sentiment warms her heart. She plays with the handle on her mug a moment before he hands her another finished salve. Izzie stands and gets satchels for the salves. For the next couple hours, Solas assists her in making use of all the Elfroot he gave her. 

Izzie hums to herself. Oddly comfortable working side by side with him. She thinks about her parents and how many times she would find them in their study like this. She smiles as she shows him her other vials of oils and their uses, her other medicines and natural remedies she makes.

She takes the Royal Elfroot start, off the window sill and watches him encourage the sprout to grow. He smiles as she shows him how to extract the oil for her more potent tinctures. She lets out a satisfied sigh, ear to ear grin rises to her face as they finish making everything they can. Glad to have his help.   
Finished, Solas turns to lean back on the desk. His arms folded, he looked at her curiously. Izzie looks deep in thought again as she wipes her desk clean. Her gaze slowly shifts back to him as she also leans back on the desk. He drops his arms to his side seeing a much more serious look on her face.  
"Izzie?" Concern in his brow.  
She bites her lip a little before she speaks slowly, "You- wouldn't let any harm come to me?" She says as she turns her head to the side to look at him.

He's confused for a moment as he's reminded of their previous conversation. "To- to take you to the Fade-Yes, of course." He smiles slightly, not wanting to get his hopes up.

"That- gut feeling- I- can't explain it but..." Deep breath and slow exhale. _Have courage..._  
A pause…

"I trust you, Solas."

His jaw falls open. He thought she would need more time to consider. Even he knew there were- _considerations_. She _trusts_ him. He did _ask_ for her trust. He thinks about turning away. To leave and not come back. _She has no idea what he has done.._.The ache in his heart threatens to pull him under. The calm in her deep blue eyes, the confidence in her voice, shatters his resolve.

She wants to know more. Wants to go to the fade. _Trusts him_ to take her there. Her trust humbles him in a way she couldn't understand. How could he pull the rug out from under her now...He gathers his thoughts to respond. 

"I-Thank you." Is all he manages to get out.

Izzie shuffles a moment as she faces him. That same look in her eyes like the other day. "I trust you. Will you take me to the fade?"

He shakes his head slightly before he looks down. He considers a moment before he looks back up, deep into her eyes. "Are you sure?" He asks softly, his hand comes up to gently place his fingertips to her temple. His eyes search hers, looking for hesitation.

Truth be told she's nervous. She realizes how this looks if Abelas or Faline comes home soon. 'Elfroot man' alone in her bedroom with her.. _.the scandal..._ She chuckles inwardly as she looks towards his hand at her cheek. "Perhaps we should..." Her voice trails off as she shows a slight grimace.

Solas recognizes the awkward tension and lets his hand fall. He respectfully takes a small step back. "If you'd like- I can take you another way. I realize it's odd to fall asleep at this hour of the day." He offers.

She gives him a soft chuckle trying to ease the tension. She nods. "What did you have in mind?"

He clasps his hands behind his back and smiles. "I believe you are familiar with Mir Da'len Somniar? You were humming it earlier."

She smiles with a curious look on her face. "My mother sang it to us when we were kids." 

"The words have changed slightly over time but- since it's something you'd recognize..."  
His expression drops a little as he thinks. His voice softens, "Listen for it tonight as you sleep. It will help you find me."

She raises an eyebrow at him. "You- think I'll be able to find you? In the fade?"

He smiles more genuinely, "Yes, call it 'gut instinct' but I have faith in you"...

Her cheeks burn as she swallows hard. His gaze is warm and she feels an odd...pull to him. She shifts her stance and averts her eyes to look out her window a moment. His eyes follow hers before he speaks again. "It's getting dark. I should go."

She nods and walks him downstairs to the front door. She grabs his green corduroy coat for him before he leaves. "Thank you, for helping me with the salves today. I really appreciate the help."

He throws his jacket on, adjusting the collar. "You're very welcome. I'm glad I could help. Thank you for showing me how to properly extract oil. I found it quite interesting." He smiles as his hands fumble for his coat pockets.

"You're welcome." She smiles as she closes the door behind him.  
.  
As Solas steps down the front steps he sees Abelas coming towards him. He pauses a moment as Abelas addresses him at the bottom of the steps.

"I take it you helped Izzie with the Elfroot today?" Ablelas asks.

"Yes, I was happy to help." Polite smile as Solas stands slightly to the side.

Abelas looks down a moment and shuffles his stance. He looks back at the Elf and lets out a warm breath into the cold. "You are like me, are you not?"

Solas gives him an odd look. He stands upright and clasps his hands behind his back. Tilting his head he steps a little closer. Looking up at him, Solas notices the smallest of silver scars that run across Abelas' face. Solas gives him a somber look. "So... Our people yet linger. You- are one of Mythal’s..."

Abelas nods.

"Not many people know the spell to remove their own vallaslin. That must have been--painful... _Ir Abelas._ "

Abelas gives him a thoughtful look. "Not as painful as the world I woke up in. Have- have you been awake since? " Abelas crosses his arms.

Solas shakes his head, "No, about 5 years now I think. You?"

Abelas looks down, "About 7 months."

A pause as Abelas looks for words. "I am the last of Mythal’s sentinels. The Vir' Abelasan has fallen to time...As it seems the rest of us have."

Solas looks at him sorrowfully. "Waking to this world must have been a shock... I’m sorry."

Abelas shifts again, dropping his arms. "Who were you? Before?" _Wondering if there is any chance he knew this Elf before the veil was created. Before the doors to Mythal's temple slammed shut._

Solas stiffens a moment before he responds, "I'm no one now...Like you. Just trying to figure out where I fit in this world. I- I do believe there is a chance for this world- a chance for restoration. Or at least-.. _.Hope_." Solas gives him a small smile.

Abelas returns his small smile, not aware of the depth of his words. "I- imagine that no one knows..."

"No, but-" He pauses. "There may be a time when I could see myself telling someone someday.” _Someone I deem important in my life_. “For now I believe it best to keep one's anonymity. " He looks a little sad as he searches Abelas' face. Abelas nods. A quiet unspoken agreement not to reveal each other. 

"Ma Serannas, Abelas" 

"Dareth Shiral. I'm sure we will be seeing more of each other."

Solas nods and smiles as he disappears into the night.  
.  
..  
...


	12. In Sleep He Sang To Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Solas takes Izzie to the Fade :) Fluff and feels.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Mir Da'len Somniar"  
> Sun sets, little one,  
> Time to dream  
> Your mind journeys,  
> But I will hold you here.  
> Where will you go, little one  
> Lost to me in sleep?  
> Seek truth in a forgotten land  
> Deep with in your heart.  
> Never fear, little one,  
> Wherever you shall go.  
> Follow my voice--  
> I will call you home.  
> I will call you my heart.

_"Egara vallas, da'len,_

_Melava somniar,_

_Mala taaren aravas,_

_Ara ma'desen melar"..._

_Solas?_ Izzie slowly opens her eyes and sits up in her bed. The room is dark as she stills a moment. Not sure if this is a dream or not _. Was she thinking about the song because she hummed it today? Or was that voice she heard him?_

She rubs her eyes and looks about her room. She shrugs, _looks like my room._ She feels a little silly. Just as she goes to lay back down, in the corner of her eye she spots a candle on her nightstand. Her brows furrow and her heart thumps in her chest. _I don't remember lighting a candle-_

_"Iras ma ghilas, da'len_

_Ara ma'nedan ashir_

_Dirthara lothlenan'as_

_Bal emma mala dir"_

She trembles a little as she hears it more clearly. She looks around again and slowly shuffles her feet out of bed, her toes hitting the floor. She looks down to see an eerie fog covering the ground. The hardwood floors she's used to feeling feels strangely soft on her bare feet.

"Solas? I hear you. I'm listening"... She says quietly. She gets up to stand, her balance seeming less stable than usual. She takes the candle from her nightstand and looks at it curiously. She moves about her room deciding to softly hum the tune. She stands by her desk and notices it's bare. None of her vials or jars. She imagines the Elfroot hanging from the twine from earlier that day. Her heart beating against her chest like a caged bird, she looks above to see a blackened ceiling. Izzie takes a shuddering breath as she hears him again.

" _Tel'enfenim, da'len_

_Irassal ma ghilas_

_Ma garas mir renan_

_Ara ma'athlan vhenas_

_Ara ma'athlan vhenan"_

She looks around her room again, not seeing him. It's entirely nerve wracking. She takes a deep breath and closes her eyes.

"Solas… Where are you?"

It takes a moment but she hears him again.

_"I can hear you. I'm here, don't worry."_

She huffs a little and looks down at her feet. The fog near her ankles seems to dissipate. She hums as she stands by her armoire. She turns around her room again and freezes as she realizes her door is gone, the dark wood that lines her bedroom walls just...continues ...

Panic rising in her voice. "Solas. My- my door is gone. It's gone."

" _Follow my voice, Is there a mirror by chance in your dream Izzie?"_

She steps to the right of her desk and stands in front of her floor length mirror. She looks at herself in her white nightgown. Glad it's not overly revealing. She feels a faint vibration coming from the mirror. She cocks her head to the side and tentatively reaches out to the mirror, her palm stretching across the glass as she feels it warm to her touch. After a moment she slowly sees another reflection come into view. 

_"I'm here Izzie. It's ok."_

She looks at her hand against the glass. The warmth radiating off of it gets stronger as does the image of another hand beyond the mirror. Her breath hitches at the vividness of this dream. The hand seemingly reaching out for her. There's a tremble in her voice.

"Solas..."

_"Izzie, do you trust me?"_

She straightens as she takes a deep breath. "Yes."

_"Take my hand Izzie."_

She feels the mirror give for a moment as she reaches through. The surface ripples at her touch. Her hand shaking as she takes his hand. She looks up into the mirror to see him softly smiling back at her, a light fog obscuring him. White collared shirt and black suspenders in forest green trousers. She smiles as she squeezes her eyes closed, feeling Solas pull her through...

.

Her vision is blurry, dark as she takes a deep breath, she blinks a few times trying to come to. She feels warm. A minute goes by as she hears what sounds like ambient noise. She can hear several voices, some sounding near and farther away. A hand comes up to softly hold the back of her head. A soft warm wind twirls through her hair.

"I'm sorry that was a bit-. It can be disorienting the first time you leave your own dream."

She takes note of what feels like another hand around her waist as she tries to lean back a little. She blinks a few times as Solas' face comes into view. He's holding her close. A warm sunset glow emanating from behind him. He smiles at her as his hold loosens, his features sharpening till she can see him clearly. He notices this change and lets her go. 

She looks around at her surroundings, trying to find the source of the noise she heard. Streets with horse drawn carriages and roads that wind around tall buildings. Sunset hues casting light in their direction.

"This is- this is Val Royeaux?" She sounds a little disappointed.

Solas takes note of her furrowed brows. He lets out a small chuckle.

"Val Royeaux is familiar to you. Easier to show you this way."

She recognizes the street they are on. The sweets shop Cullen likes is within view as well as other shops she recognizes. She sees people enter and leave shops with groceries and other packages and bags. The smell of the bakery her and Cole love down the street. She breathes it in and smiles. She looks around her with fascination. Solas comes back in her view as she realizes she's been gripping the side of his arm. He looks down and smiles softly. 

"Walk with me?" He says as he offers his arm. He must know she's still a little unbalanced. Her feet are still bare as she looks down at the ground. The dirty street somehow feels soft under her feet. She loops her arm in his as they start to walk down the street.

.

"The Fade may appear as something else entirely when shaped by dreams. Much of the Fade belongs to the spirits or demons that live there. They change the landscape of the Fade to emulate what they see in the minds of mortal dreamers. They copy locations, objects, people and concepts of the real world, often in a cruel or confusing way."

As they walk a spirit walks toward them and seemingly walks through Izzie as she sucks in a breath and spins to watch him continue to walk down the street.

"So- the people I'm seeing right now...They are just spirits?" She says with concern at the one that walked right through her.

"Yes, Spirits are nowhere near consistent of course, and fluctuate depending on how the dreamer helps shape the dream as well. Spirits set the stage, as it were, and we fill it with our own dreams- or nightmares." 

He stops walking for a moment, realizing she's let go of his arm. He continues.

"I've seen spirits of wonder, imagination, and curiosity smile when they get to see something new. It's a rare and wonderful sight-... " He turns around to Izzie a few feet back, who is beaming at a white wisp who has caught her attention.

"Solas...This is...Incredible." Her eyes blown wide as she reaches her hand out to the whisp. Ear to ear grin on her face.

He watches a few playful wisps dance around her as she twirls, followed by the melodious sound of her laughter as they graze her arm. In moments she attracted the attention of dozens of small whisps. They congregate to form a singular shape. Taking the form of a gentleman wearing coat tails and a top hat. The spirit bows and takes her by the hand to dance. She's quick on her feet as she lets the spirit lead. Solas smiles warmly as he watches her. Blissfully dancing in the street in her nightgown. The spirit twirls her before he spins her toward Solas who catches her. She gives an awkward chuckle against his chest before she rights herself. He grins as he takes her hand continuing down the street. "Stay close to me. Not all spirits are friendly."

She tilts her chin up at him as they walk. "I'm listening, keep going."

He wonders if she was any closer to him, if she could hear his heart pound. His heart racing at the feeling of her hand in his. The delighted look in her face- _mesmerising..._

He takes her to a clearing in the middle of the street and pauses. He motions his hand and the scene changes in an instant. Izzie squeezes his hand. "What? How-?"

Her voice falters as she takes in their new surroundings. Tents and log homes surround them instead of tall buildings. The spirits now taking on the forms of tired humans in simple clothes. Tunics and poorly made trousers. Solas watches her concern as he gives her hand a gentle squeeze in return. He points to the people in the tents.

"The center of Val Royeaux was once tents of oiled leather and mud, filled with ragged humans selling strings of beads made of bone."

Izzie takes a few steps pulling Solas hand in hers to get a better look. She looks out past the tents. Rolling hills stretching on for miles, Halla peeking out from behind some nearby trees. She turns to see where _The Waking Sea_ inlet should be. No docks or ships or boats of any kind. She hears an obscene noise behind her. As she slowly turns she sees an unkempt man gutting a rabbit, next to a fire. She crinkles her nose. "It smells."

He chuckles, "Yes it does" With a wave of his hand, the landscape bends to his will, changing back to the Val Royeaux she knows. They stand in front of a bakery and Solas ushers her in. "It's much better now. I enjoy the frilly cakes." He stands in front of a glass case with small cakes as he asks the spirit behind the counter for two.

They walk back outside and continue down the street as he offers her a cupcake. She looks at him curiously before she takes a bite. It melts in her mouth, strawberry with a hint of vanilla. 

Izzie hums as she finishes her cake, wiping crumbs off her nightgown, and walks next to him down another street. She takes a deep breath as her gaze returns to him at her side. "So- we summon magic from here?"

Solas nods as he looks down, thinking of an analogy that might make sense to her. "If- if you are the anchor, the Fade is the boat. The more you pull, the stronger you become. In time, your connection to the fade will allow your ability to grow. Although I'll admit that while I've studied plenty of magic in the Fade, I enjoy times like this as well, to simply explore. Take time to look at old memories or -"

"Old memories?"

"Yes, like the older Val Royeaux we saw."

"Oh." She looks down as they walk. As they round the corner of another street, she sees a familiar building come into view. As they walk closer, it starts to morph into another building. "Solas? Are- you doing that?"

He looks at her and then the building as it slowly transforms from a bail bonds office to the two story home that used to reside there. _Her family home..._

They come to stand in front of it as Izzie's eyes water, she takes Solas hand and squeezes it. She looks up at him questioningly. He's stunned that she was able to shape the fade around her so easily. Her tie to the Fade was much stronger than he thought. He feels his heart sink as he carefully meets her gaze as he softly whispers. "I- I didn't summon this building... _You_ did."

Tears in her eyes she stares at her family home. She blinks and squeezes her eyes shut as Solas wraps an arm around her waist. She leans into him at her side as she hears the faint murmur of her mother calling her siblings for dinner. Ambient noise of her siblings playing and laughing.

"I- um." She tries to get the words out between choked back sobs. Solas looks down at her with sadness in his eyes. It breaks him to see the raw emotion overwhelming her. She takes another deep breath as she closes her eyes and waves her hand in front of the house . In moments Solas watches the Fade change around them. His eyes are blown wide as she summons a lake, sunset coming through the trees as they stand on a dock. Izzie’s knees give, as she quickly sits down on the dock. He kneels to her level and tries to gently hold her shoulder before Izzie shudders at his touch as she trembles. Solas pulls his hand back. "Izzie, I'm so sorry I-" A mixture of fear and sorrow in her eyes.

She looks up at him then cocks her head around him, deep breaths coming between her words. "I see trees... water...sky. I feel... I feel the dock." She pauses as Solas understands what she is doing. He sits next to her and offers his hand. 

_She takes it._

Concern and worry washes over his face as he rubs his thumb over her knuckle. 

"What do you hear?" Solas asks calmly and evenly.

Izzie closes her eyes and inhales deeply letting it out slowly. "I- hear the wind in the branches of the tree behind us. The water under the dock..."

"What do you smell?"

Izzie looks at him with a raised eyebrow. "I smell...Nothing I smell nothing- but I think I'm feeling better. Thank you."

She lets go of his hand and pushes herself forward to the edge of the dock. Her toes hanging off the edge as she looks down. Solas moves closer next to her, quietly letting her process her emotions. Abruptly she turns to him, " How come you've never asked? About my arm? It's not-invisible." 

There's almost a scowl on her face as she questions him. His stomach plummets as he struggles to swallow. Lump in his throat making his voice come out hoarse. " I- I assumed you didn't want to talk about it."... His voice trailed off.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come off accusatory I just-. Usually someone would ask by now"...

"I’m sorry Izzie I-I" He turns to look at the water. He can feel her gaze on him. Feel the questioning look in her tear filled eyes. He shakes his head before he turns back to look at her. She's suddenly moved closer to him as his breath hitches at her sudden closeness. She carefully leans towards him, placing the smallest kiss on his cheek. A flush rises to his cheeks as her lips leave his skin, tingling from her touch. 

"That was- unexpected." He whispers to her softly, his eyes suddenly focused on her lips. She tilts her head down, her thumb and forefinger plays with a seam in her nightgown.

"I know I just- wanted to thank you.-For bringing me here. It's amazing... I- don't have the words. I- maybe I can show you a more happy memory next time. Explain what happened back there." She offers. Her demeanor is more calm.

He watches the wind blow through her brown hair, the sun setting in the background. _Did she mean to take them to a- romantic setting?_

He wonders how they ended up, caught up in this moment. How she's managed to force him to consider his feelings for her. He had been trying to keep his growing affection for her at bay. He tentatively leans forward, letting his forehead touch hers. Looking down at her hand on the dock. The silver ring on her hand. He takes a deep breath before he looks back up into her eyes and smiles lightly. 

"I'm going to come check on you later."

"Later?"

He lets a small chuckle leave his lips. "Yes, sometime after you- _Wake up."_

.

..

...

....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, heavily inspired by Phantom of the Opera. Thank you all for reading this far. Im working on Chapter 13. :) In case you are wondering, I've planned a part 1 and part 2 to this fic. Possibly a part 3. So if your're still here for it, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I love the comments and messages. Find me on Instagram mistress_wolf_writesau for the incredible fan art associated with this fic. Ma Serranas <3<3<3


	13. Wishing They Somehow Here Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Izzie tells Solas...

Solas walks briskly to Izzie's early the next morning. He shakes his head. His thoughts trample over each other as he berates himself. _How could I have not realized that could have happened? Fool....You knew she has an incredible connection to the fade. It was totally within the realm of possibility for her to bend the fade to her will like that. You knew damn well where the house was. Could have taken her anywhere else..._

He grumbles to himself but his pace picks up as he passes the bakery. No sweet smell of frilly cakes. It's too early... _It's too early. She might not even be up yet. What are you thinking? This is so inappropriate. What if others are up? This looks bad. A man who is NOT her betrothed showing up at her doorstep at this hour..._

He slows down as he rounds the corner, the house in view he looks up as he slows nearly to a stop. _She had a panic attack..._ She pushed him away at first, but then...

He pauses and closes his eyes as he stands in front of the house. He takes a deep breath, remembering her lips on his cheek as he lets out a shaky exhale. _She trusted you. -and then-...Sh_ e took his hand. He had nearly dropped his defenses. So close to taking her face in his hands. Smoothing his thumbs over her tears, wanting to calm her- to whisper sweet nothings and hold her tight against him. _' I would let no harm come to you'..._

He fumbles a hand out of his pocket as walks up the steps, slowly raising it to knock on the door. He pauses and hesitates as he watches his warm breath hit the cold air. 

_'I'm going to come check on you'..._ He remembers his words to her but shakes his head and turns away. He makes it down two steps before he hears the door open followed by her quiet voice.

"Solas? How long have you been out here?"

He turns to face her. "Only a minute...I- I’m sorry, I- forgive me. It's far too early and inappropriate for me to- I just wanted to make sure-"

She's half way through the door, he can see the ends of her nightgown at the bottom of the door, violet robe tied loosely around her waist. He walks back up the steps. There's some concern in her face that makes his stomach want to plummet before she reaches for the front of his coat, pulling him inside forcefully. She quietly shuts the door behind him and ushers him into the kitchen silently.

He watches her with some concern as she grabs a mug from a cupboard. "Cocoa?" She asks flatly. 

"Y-yes, thank you."

He watches her a moment, her back turned to him. His gaze turns to a drawing pad opened on the kitchen table with numerous ripped out sketches strewn all over. He takes a step towards it as he thumbs over one. A small smile tugs at the corner of his lips as he recognizes the spirit in the top hat that danced with her in the fade. He's momentarily relieved until he glances at the other drawings. All hastily drawn images of her family home...Deep pencil lines pierce through the pages.

She gently nudges his arm with her elbow holding out the warm mug to him. He finally meets her eyes as he takes it. She smiles faintly at him. "Thank you." He whispers, not sure if anyone else is awake in the house.

Izzie takes a step back and grabs her mug of coffee, leaning back on the counter off to his side. She stares at the table hiding any expression behind her drink. He swallows hard. His words come soft and slow. "How long have you been up?"

Izzie shrugs, "Maybe an hour or two. I couldn't go back to sleep."

"How are you feeling?" He asks softly.

"I’m-I’m fine." Her tone is flat as she sips her coffee. She moves closer to the table and motions to one of the drawings. "I think this one looks right, although I think the roof was taller, but I- I can't remember."

“It’s likeness is uncanny...truly. I didn't know you could draw." He gives her a small smile.

She nods and gives him a more genuine smile. It's small but it eases the tension a little. "My father taught me." She clears her throat as she picks up the one of the spirit in the top hat. "He used to go on expeditions when I was younger. Studied archaeology. When he went, he would sketch what he saw in his notebooks and bring them back to me. Promised he'd take me someday. "

Solas gives her a warm smile as he sips his drink. "I think I would have liked your father."

She nods. "He and my mother would have found your gifts fascinating." She sets the sketch down and stares at her drawings on the table. Her eyes dart back and forth. Solas watches her. Her previous smile fading again.

"Izzie?"

"When can we go back?" Her gaze shifts back to him.

"You-want to go back?" His brows knit with concern as she takes a deep breath.

Izzie pauses a long time as she taps the side of her mug anxiously. His heart fills with sorrow as he looks at her. She gently sets her mug down and pulls her robe over her more. Her head tilts to the side as she bites her trembling lip. A tear forces its way down her cheek. Solas hears the break in her voice as she starts softly.

"I keep it all locked up...I don't talk about it-" She shakes her head. Pain in her voice scratching the surface. Another long pause as she turns to look out the kitchen window. 

He sets his cup down and steps closer to her. She wipes her tears with the end of her sleeve before she lets out a soft sniffle. "I told you I'd explain what happened-"

He gently takes her shoulder and turns her to him. "Izzie, I'm so sorry. Whatever happened- I didn't mean to open old wounds. I-"

"Would you walk with me?" She quietly cuts him off. Her eyes stare down the floor. Solas clears his throat as he smiles softly. "Of course" he says with a small smile, "-you may want to get dressed though."

It dawns on her she's been in her nightgown this whole time. She had somehow been so comfortable like this in the fade with him. She chuckles awkwardly. 

"Oh, right. Hang on a minute."

She swiftly and quietly goes up stairs, throwing on a vest and blouse, loose trousers and her oversized coat. She grabs her notepad from her desk and jots a note for Abelas, letting him know where she is, sliding it under his door.

.

Solas walks with her down the street, occasionally glancing over to her . Trying not to stare but anxious to hear her speak. It's a stark contrast to their time in the fade. Her posture is stiff as she walks beside him. Her eyes wander over the ground as their feet lightly crunch over the frost on the ground. Solas realizes this is the first he's seen her without her hat. Her hair let loose, not in the usual cord wrapped tight. 

.

She catches his gaze after a while and speaks up finally. "We don't exactly know what happened. One minute my father called me upstairs I think. The next-."

She pauses at a corner and looks around. No one was out and about in the street. It's terribly early in the morning. No carriages, no pedestrians. None of the usual activity in this part of town. She looks around for anyone else besides the two of them as she steadies her breath, closing her eyes. "I've tried to- to remember what happened- but all I can _see_ is smoke. All I can _feel_ is my skin burning. My arm trapped." She clears her throat and pauses for what seems like forever. Eyes glued shut trying to keep the emotion from breaking through. "I- hear screams- I taste ash- and then...Silence..."

Izzie opens her eyes to look at Solas facing her. His expression the most serious concern she's seen with him. She continues a little more steady. "I remember feeling someone carrying me. I'm told that whoever rescued me, fled the scene shortly after Morrigan's mother found me. Whoever it was, was there before any fire fighters or medics arrived _. 'Lucky'_ Morrigan's mother called me." She scoffs and then swallows hard. 

His heart thumps loud in his chest as he tentatively reaches his hand out for hers. Unsure if it's appropriate, but hoping she'll take it. His heart aches to comfort her, nothing more. She looks down at his hand a moment and considers, _she had already held his hand before in the fade_ . She knows she's about to take him down _the_ street.

_Just in case she panics again._ She thinks, as she lightly takes his hand. Allowing this intimacy.

 _If only she knew how much this broke him too._ He thinks until he scolds himself. _Selfish of him to equate his pain to hers._ She gives his hand a gentle squeeze as she takes him down the street. The bail bonds office comes into view slowly. She nods towards the buildings next to it. "It's been four years but they've painted over the blast marks. I'm told it was an explosion of some kind. I- was laid up in bed. I-" Solas gently smooths his thumb over the top of her hand as they come to a stop.

They stand across the street from the building. He can feel the tingle on his skin. Evidence that what happend, caused the veil to thin here. Wonders if she can feel it too.

She pauses as the words get stuck in her throat. "I didn't see what-what was left till after city workers cleaned up the rubble." A deep breath and hitched exhale escapes her. "They-" She shakes her head and looks down. He watches her tears flow freely as she shatters. "It- only took them 6 months to build on top of it. The- the city called the blank space an 'eye sore'."

Grief and anger wash over her. Her whole body visibly started to tremble. The break in her voice overwhelms his need to comfort her. He pulls her to him wrapping one arm around her waist and the other around the back of her head. She shakes through the tears letting him hold her, sliding her arm up his, gripping his corduroy coat. Izzie mumbles quietly against his chest. " _Bastards_ "...

"I’m so sorry Izzie." He says softly. Squeezing his eyes shut as he holds her. His face and hand, gently resting on top of her head. The smell of Elfroot and Lavender in her hair as he breathes her in. _His orb, his irresponsibility... Left nothing but sadness and despair in his wake. For_ ** _his_** _world- and_ ** _hers_** _...She deserves so much more than I can give her._ He had felt so numb when he woke to this world. As soon as she entered his life, even amongst his inner turmoil, he felt some semblance of peace being near her. Helping her with the Elfroot, spending time with her, talking about the fade... He thought maybe he would regret not claiming the orb for himself. No...She was not **_his_** and not of **_his_** world... But he couldn't imagine her not in it. A few minutes pass before her breathing steadies.

She tilts her head to the side against his chest, "I'm sorry- I've been better lately. I don't usually fall apart like this."

"Izzie..." He pulls her tighter, hoping it's not too much. "You have been nothing but kind to me since we met. I can't imagine-. You have put your trust in me like no one else has. Let me open up to you... I'm honored that you wished to share this with me in return. I’m- I’m so sorry our trip to the fade brought you pain."

She shakes her head, pulling back to wipe tears from her face. She whispers as she meets his eyes. "It hurts- but it's been years since I've heard my siblings laugh." She pauses as she chuckles slightly and smiles, another tear escaping her watery eyes. 

"I used to think that somehow, If i just focused on their voices, I could see them again. If I just focused on them... That somehow I could have them back again. Just a small space in my dreams where I could remember their faces more clearly. I hadn't thought it possible-until you took me to the fade....Thank you"

Pain in Solas' expression as she speaks."You- you've forgotten their faces?"

Izzie shrugs as she leans back a little in his arms. "Sort of. I guess- I just can't see them clearly through the pain. It's like blank spots in my head where I know what is supposed to be there but- I can't see them."

"I- want to go back." She continues, looking at him with glassy eyes "I want to see them again, look at happier times. Will you take me back?"

Solas clears his throat, gravel in his voice as he replies, "Of course Izzie."

"You said- we could explore old memories. I'd- I- thought I needed to know what happened that day, to find some closure-"

His chest tightens... _She deserves to know. She deserves-_

Izzie shakes her head, "I- I don't think I want to though. For a long time... I couldn't sleep afterwards. It's too much..." She takes a deep breath letting it out slowly.

Solas calms himself and gently loosens his hold on her. "I understand. Re-visiting painful memories can open the door for more-. " He stops himself a moment.

_She deserves the truth...It would be kinder in the long run. I-I have to tell her. She deserves peace. Even if that means she hates me for it..._

"If- you'd like- and only if or when you're ready. I'll take you there...Help you find out what really happened that day."

"Truly?"

"Of course, Izzie" _I'd do anything for you...Even if it kills me.._. 

She smiles at him a little, tears drying on her cheek. "Thank you."

She pulls away but smiles as he offers his arm. She loops her arm in his as they walk back. After a few beats Solas breaks the silence. 

"I'm incredibly impressed you were able to bend the fade like that on your first try by the way. That normally takes a great deal of practice and concentration." He sees her smile as she looks ahead. Wind blowing through her wavy hair. "That dock you took us too must be associated with a strong memory of yours." He raises a curious eyebrow at her as her grin widens.

"Uh, yes -my mind goes there when everything hurts. It's sort of my happy place." She feels her cheeks flush a little against the cold air, thinking of her first kiss with Cullen on the docks. The warmth in his smile, his strong hands holding her, the sunset behind him. One perfect moment, untainted by pain.

Solas puzzles at the expression on her face. Not looking to pry but happy to see her smile again. They pause at her door, as Izzie shuffles her stance a moment. She looks up at Solas who is softly smiling at her. "Thank you for walking with me. It hurts to talk about but I'm glad I did. Thank you."

Solas pauses and looks down, hands fidgeting in his pockets, he meets her gaze again. "You're welcome. I promise I do not take your trust lightly. Again, I'm honored you felt comfortable enough to share that with me."

She smiles at him. There's an awkward pause as she realizes she forgot her hat. Her wavy hair blowing freely in the wind. "I know the original intention of you taking me to the fade was to see if I could expand on my ability. Perhaps-"

"Another time." He says with a gleam in his eye. The sudden urge to step forward, close the distance, rest his forehead against hers, to take her hand in his one more time... _inappropriate..._

"I should go. I’ll have more Elfroot dried and ready for you in a few days." Solas says quietly as she opens the front door.

Izzie nods, "Thank you, I'll be sure to stop by. Bye Solas."

"Bye, Izzie..."

.

..

As Solas walks towards The Ritz, he swears he can feel eyes on him. He turns and looks around. Not seeing anyone he continues home...

...

....

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More inspiration from Phantom of The Opera for the title and feels. It keeps dawning on me how many parallels I can keep drawing from POTO and my story. Things I didn't necessarily plan for. The time of year, the snow, Orlais being inspired by France, the love triangle, even her best friends mother taking her in...Thank you for reading and your continued support. :) <3


	14. In The Shadows

Abelas walks softly beside Izzie as they stroll through the alchemical shop. Picking up things Izzie needs that she can't grow. Abelas nearly towers over the shelves as they walk up and down the aisles, holding a basket for Izzie as she fills it with various items.

"What are we picking up again?" He asks.

Izzie lightly smiles. "I've made more than enough cold medicines to last the entire flu season I think. The only other common ailment this time of year is for lotions and balms for dry or cracked skin due to the weather." 

Abelas nods, "Is that what the beeswax is for?"

"Yes, and the coconut oil." She hums as she makes her way down another aisle passing an Elf. Abelas moves to the side, following close behind Izzie. She takes a small vial off the shelf and inspects it, taking the top off and breathing in it's aroma.  _ Mmm Peppermint...  _ She smiles to herself before she turns to Abelas. 

"Are you out of shampoo?"

Abelas raises an eyebrow. "I- almost. I was going to get some when we head to the market next."

Izzie shakes her head. "No need. I can make you another if you like what you had. Morrigan likes this scent too."

"You don't have to-"

"Besides it's more expensive at the store"... She trails off as she opens another vial and smells it. "Ahhh"... _ Elderflower.  _ She smiles wide and shakes her head. It's been a month now since Cullen left. She places the vial in the basket. Appreciating the small things like this that keep him close to her heart.

"Thank you." She hears Abelas behind her pulling her from her wandering thoughts. 

She turns and nods to him. "You're welcome," she says with a smile. They head down another aisle as Izzie thumbs over a label for something she needs.  _ Someone must have taken the last one.  _ She shrugs as she continues down the aisle, content with what she's gathered but curious about other items. She picks up some mugwort extract as she makes chit chat with Abelas.

"How was the trip to the library the other day?"

"Good,-- I think." Abelas says with a small grimace.

"Morrigan’s a hard one to read, isn't she? One minute she's warm the other she's cold. Don't let her bite worry you. There's a heart in there, I promise."

Abelas lets out a small chuckle. "I thought that perhaps she was warming up to me until she insisted I didn't need to take her to the train station."

Izzie smiles and nods. "She prefers to feel more independent. She'll come around. It took her awhile to warm up to Cullen when we were younger."

Izzie throws Abelas a warm smile behind her, before heading to the counter. The lightly tanned human with short dark hair addresses Izzie. 

"Did you find what you needed Izzie?"

"Yes, well- only one thing I couldn't find and that's phosphorus. I don't need it terribly though. It's just for making soaps."

A chuckle comes from her side, behind Abelas. 

"Soap? Hmm... I didn't know there were other uses for it."

Izzie and Abelas turn to the heavily Antivan voice behind them. A shorter Elf with blonde hair looks at the jar in his hands and then at Izzie. Smirk rising to his face. 

Izzie speaks up. "And what do  _ you  _ use it for?"

The Elf saunters over to the counter facing her. His eyes meet hers as he shoots her a wicked grin. "Oh nothing as innocent as soap. Something a little more - _ dangerous _ ." He says with a wink as he leans against the counter.

Abelas glares at the Elf as the man behind the counter huffs and shakes his head. "Maker, Zev you sound like a loon." He rolls his eyes then looks at Izzie. "He makes fertilizer. Don't you Zev?"

The Elf gives him a cheeky grin and looks back at Izzie as he shrugs. "Add enough to it and it kills the slugs."

Izzie chuckles awkwardly as she realizes he was just being sarcastic. Poor attempt at humor. "I found everything I need Adan. Thank you."

Abelas huffs and stares down the blonde Elf. Noting a separate tin in his hands. He had watched him take it off the shelf when they passed him the first time down the aisle.  _ Thallium.. _ .  _ Enough of it and it can be used as an effective poison. Tasteless and odorless... _ Abelas moves between Izzie and the Elf, placing the items they need on the counter. Eyeing the cocky sounding Elf in the process. Abelas returns to her side, his hand resting at the small of her back. 

Adan rings her up while the blonde Elf takes note of Abelas' wandering eyes and sets the tin of Thallium on the counter. He shrugs at Abelas, "Rat problem."

Abelas holds back a scoff and escorts Izzie out of the shop with their bag of goods.

.

A little ways down the street, Izzie nudges Abelas gently. "He was odd."

Abelas looks over his shoulder, scanning for the odd Elf a moment. He sees him exit the shop, and toss some coins towards a beggar woman on the sidewalk. The Elf walks down the street, away from their direction. Abelas offers his arm to Izzie who smiles and loops her arm in his. "Indeed" He replies.

He looks down at Izzie as she gently pulls him to the farmers market. At least a dozen different vendors form a line around a pavilion surrounding a beautiful and elaborate fountain. Numerous water features sprout from the center of a marble statue of Andraste.  _ If it were any colder it might freeze over...  _ Abelas thinks.

At that thought Abelas notices a small human child with his mother.  _ No older than 5 _ , he thinks. His mother is caught up in conversation with another woman across the fountain. Izzie looks up to Abelas as his steps have slowed. She follows his line of sight to the boy. The boy leans over the fountain to look at the water.  _ It's not deep enough he would drown if he falls in.  _ She thinks.

They watch the boy dip his hand into the fountain. He looks up at his mother a moment then back at the water. His small hand grazes the surface and in a moment, it slowly freezes over from his touch. The boy smiles wide and tugs his mother's hand. She looks down and frowns, picking him up and looking around to see if anyone saw that. She catches Izzie's eyeline, who just smiles politely and nods. A small smile graces the mothers face as she excuses herself from her friend. 

They watch them leave as Abelas takes Izzie to the stalls to look for groceries Faline asked for. "It's not often you hear of, or see a human with a gift." She says. Melancholy in her voice.

Abelas nods, taking a deep breath. "I had heard as much. She is lucky we seemed to be the only ones who saw that."

Izzie nods, a sad expression. "I- I can't imagine they would take him away from his mother. He's so young." Izzie ponders as she picks a bundle of carrots from a vendor, handing him some coin as they continue to peruse the stalls. Izzie shakes her head. " I suppose if his parents aren’t gifted it may be hard to train him to use it..." Her thoughts trail off as Abelas nudges her abruptly. She looks up and smiles at him. He's normally so serious. She had begun to wonder if she annoyed him when  _ she _ nudged him. 

He looks down at her and smiles faintly. "Isn't that what Cullen is working to improve? The system and how it treats people?" Trying to calm her fears of the future, as Cullen had mentioned. 

Izzie shrugs. "I- he didn't have an answer for me. Not yet anyways. If the Watchmen would ever take a child away from their parents."

"Cullen told me he thinks the new Knight Commander will try to be fair. That she seems like an honorable woman. I don't exactly know what he's doing. But from what I've been able to perceive- Cullen is a good man, and he seems to find and attract other good people. Perhaps there is hope in this future he sees."

Izzie pauses to look up at Abelas. A smile as she realizes this is the most conversation she's gotten out of him. She nudges him playfully. "He does find good people." She winks at him. "I'm glad he found you."

Abelas looks ahead and smiles. " Me too."

.

..

Four blocks away from Izzie, the beggar woman unwraps her scarf from her cowl. She sighs as she ducks into a nearby alleyway. She cups her hands and breathes warm air into them. She puts her fingers to her lips and whistles. She waits a moment and peers around the corner again. Her red hair escaping her hood, whipping through the wind. Eyeing Izzie and the tall Elf with her. She hears the thud behind her as she slowly turns, unalarmed. "I saw him eye you Zev, that was too close."

The blonde Elf gives her a smirk and casually leans against the wall. Arms folded, heel kicked out. "Ahh- perhaps he just wanted another look at  _ this  _ fine specimen." He motions to himself as the hooded woman rolls her eyes.

"You said he does not seem to leave her side, nor does she leave the house without him." She states dryly.

"Normally you would be correct. But there is another I've seen her with... The one the Knight Commander has been looking for."

"Truly?" She raises a suspicious eyebrow at him.

"I must say she has quite the eye for handsome Elves. Too bad the tall one is so protective, I-"

"This is not a game Zev, you need to be more careful." She looks over to the brown bag in his hands before she looks around the corner again. "What in the void did you pick up from Adan's?"

He huffs behind her, "Don't worry about it." 

She turns abruptly and snags the bag from him. He pouts his protest as she searches the bag's contents. She pauses as she throws it back to him. "I thought you left that life behind." 

Zevran shakes his head and tucks the items away."I did, as did the other Crows you've recruited. But it does not hurt to be prepared for anything. Besides, it was a helpful rouse while I tried to determine-"

The hooded woman cuts him off, turning to face him. "-If he is gifted as well?"

"He carries a small pistol on his person and a knife on his hip under the coat. That is all I could gather."

She shakes her head as she starts to wrap her scarf around her face again. Tucking it under her cowl. "Whether he is gifted or not, he is armed and looks like he knows how to handle himself. I will need to let Cassandra know about him--" She pauses as she watches Izzie and Abelas continue throughout the market. Losing them in the crowd.

A heavy exhale leaves her. "Zev?" She looks over her shoulder.

"Yes?"

"I see no reason to let Cassandra know about the other Elf unless you give me reason to worry. I'd prefer that if a mage seems harmless-"

"-That they should remain nameless. I understand." He nods respectfully as he turns to leave.

"Zev?" Still looking over her shoulder at him.

"Yes, Leli- Nightingale?"

"There's been another victim. Same afflictions as the last one. We may need her sooner rather than later. Keep a close eye-"

"-And keep to the shadows. I know." He slowly backs up, fiddling with a contraption as Lelianna turns to watch the street. She hears his sharp inhale as his grappling gun fires. Hears him deftly scale the building next to them. His footsteps recede till all she hears is the wind whipping past her face. She shudders at the cold and pulls her cowl down further.  _ I hope we are right about you Lavellan... _

_. _

_.. _

_... _

Solas puts together another arrangement of flowers on his rooftop, handing the bundle to Cole who wraps it in twine, carefully placing it in a vase. A handcart between them holding at least a dozen vases. "Thank you for helping me today Cole." 

"You're welcome. I like helping- and you like the company."

"I do."

It's quiet while they work, until Cole hums and taps his foot. Solas catches him in his peripheral and smiles faintly.  _ Mir Da'len Somniar... _

"Where did you hear that tune Cole?" Solas asks with a small grin.

Cole smiles. "You and Izzie keep humming it this week. It's hard  _ not _ to hear it.  _ She _ likes it because it reminds her of her mother.  _ You _ like it because it makes her smile."

Solas shakes his head and continues selecting the best sprigs of Peonies and Dahlias for the next arrangement. Not entirely sure the odd boy's origins. Neither spirit nor human. Not gifted like a mage, but certainly special. Caught somewhere in the middle. He looks over to the planter by his door of the Forget-Me-Nots he planted to show Izzie. His facial expression saddens...

Cole watches his eyeline and quietly comments. "They are not gone, as long as you remember them."

"I know Cole."

"She finds happiness in the small things. You could find happiness too in your own way."

"I don't believe I deserve such-"

"-That's just the story you keep telling yourself. It haunts you, keeps you from your sleep."

Solas finishes the last bundle handing it to Cole. He walks to his table and picks up his teacup of cocoa. "There is more cocoa Cole." Solas motions to the pellet stove and sips his drink. 

Cole shakes his head. "No thank you." As he comes to sit across from him. He watches Solas frown into his teacup, deep in thought. Cole lets out a small chuckle. Prompting Solas to look up at him.

"You're doing that thing Varric says you do."

Solas shakes his head and smiles lightly. "Brooding?"

Cole smiles. "Yes, you're stuck on that last part."

Solas' expression falls again and sets his cup down, leaning forward on his elbows. He lets out a heavy sigh as his foot taps.

"The story I keep telling myself-the one that haunts me. My life was never just _one_ story Cole... It's many stories. To some a villian, who hurt people in ways I can never make up for. To others perhaps, I was once a hero. Having the strength and ability to-- make decisions no one else would." He sighs and fiddles with the teacup. 

Cole watches him from under his wide brim hat. "You- could start a new story. Like Varric. Maybe this one will have a better ending than the last." Cole says. His voice filled with hope that he helped Solas today. Not just with the flowers...

"That is a nice sentiment Cole. Thank you." 

Cole bids him goodbye as Solas takes the cart through the various rooms of the hotel. Carefully placing each vase in every empty room. He thinks about Izzie and what he can show her in the fade. How to help her expand on what she knows. He thinks about the inevitable day when she will ask him to show her what really happened... Her words ring in his ears. _ ' I couldn't sleep afterwards. It's too much...'. _

_ Maybe It's not inevitable.  _ He ponders as he sets the last vase down. Pulling the cart with him to the elevator, heading back up. He pours himself another cup of cocoa as he wanders to the edge of the roof. Looking out across the buildings and the Waking Sea. He smiles faintly thinking about Izzie. Every thoughtful question, every curious expression. Her willingness to learn more. To  _ be  _ more, that she might be able to help  _ more  _ people. 

He puzzles again at Cole's words. ' _ You could start a new story.'  _ He wanders to his bed, setting his cup on the nightstand and lies down. Pinching the bridge of his nose. Alleviating the pressure he can feel behind his tired eyes. It's not quite dark out. But Cole was right _. He hasn't been sleeping... _

_ I could start a new story... _ He thinks to himself.  _ One where the Dread Wolf doesn't get a part. One that may have a better ending than my last.  _ He shakes his head as he closes his eyes.  _ It's a nice sentiment... _ He drifts as he starts to hum the song. Hoping he can find her tonight...

.

..

...

....


	15. Falon

Abelas is sitting at the kitchen table, taking apart his pistol Cullen gave him. He had watched him clean it before he left. It doesn't really need to be cleaned again, but he knows he needs practice. He knows eventually, maintaining the weapon will become muscle memory. He's more comfortable with the knife he keeps at his side, but it's good to have another option available.

He sits back as he puts the gun back together, setting it on the table. He lets out a slow breath as he closes his eyes, hearing Faline come around the corner, the sound of her slippers on the hardwood making her way to the fridge. She takes two beers out setting them on the table next to him. Abelas opens his eyes and smiles softly at this new nightly ritual. Her usual messy bun piled on top of her head. She pops the top off hers and sits down, taking her brown scarf off. Sleepiness in her voice. "She went to bed already. You two have a long day?"

Abelas thumbs over the label on his beer, letting out a loaded sigh. "For not needing to make any more cold medicines, there were quite a few things she wanted to pick up."

Faline nods as she takes a sip of her beer. "She really appreciates you taking her. Nice for her to get out more...And to have someone to talk to too, distract her from worrying about Cullen."

Abelas leans forward on the table across from Faline. His fingers lightly tap on the glass bottle in his hand, his eyes wandering. He's being paid to protect-not ask questions. But...

"Faline?"

"Yes?"

"What is it that Cullen is doing? I know-...Izzie seemed particularly worried today. I-..." He pauses trying to collect his thoughts. He shakes his head. "My apologies, It is not my business."

Faline leans back in her chair, crossing her arms letting out a light huff. "Actually I think it  _ is  _ your business. Whatever is going on behind the scenes affects you as well. I'll admit I don't know as much about it other than the rumors, but I've had my suspicions."

Abelas looks up to meet her eyes. Concern in his brow, as he thinks about his previous conversations with Cullen. His need to protect his home, his family,  _ his Izzie _ ...Wanting to have as much information as possible to secure their future. If Cullen was trusting him with his family...Faline was right. He  _ did  _ have a right to know what was going on. 

Abelas lets out a deep breath, "I've deduced a few things that- worry me. One being that Lady Morrigan seems to have more business to attend to in regards to the lyrium mines. Especially since Cullen accepted this new position. I know she is connected to the same man Cullen answers to."

Faline nods between sips. "Gaspard."

"Yes..."

Faline bites her lip a moment and shuffles in her chair. Feeling Abelas' piercing gaze. She lowers her voice as she clears her throat. "These walls aren't as thick as people think they are. Occasionally I--  _ hear _ things. Things maybe I wasn't  _ supposed  _ to hear."

"Such as?"

Faline shakes her head as she meets his eyes. Choosing to let out a single word...

"Templar."

Abelas eyes widen as he sets his beer on the table. He stares at her a moment before he speaks evenly, hiding his surprise at their common conclusion. "That has indeed crossed my mind. That perhaps they were bringing the Order back."

Faline nods and leans forward, "It makes sense. There's been talk about what to do if-"

_ Bang! Bang! Bang! _

Three loud knocks at the front door startle Faline and Abelas from their conversation. Abelas puts his hand out immediately to Faline, urging her to stay still as he grabs his pistol with his other hand. He straightens as he keeps his pistol in hand, moving it behind his back. He quietly moves to the front door, casually looking through the peephole.

A woman with short dark hair in a uniform with two Watchmen at her sides. Abelas motions Faline to stand behind him before he opens the door. 

"Good evening- officers." Abelas says evenly.

The woman nods and takes off her military hat. "Good evening, my name is Knight-Commander Cassandra Pentagast... I'm looking for a Lady Isolde. I was given instructions by Commander Rutherford that I would find her here. Her assistance is required with a- sensitive matter."

Abelas casually looks her up and down, briefly scanning the Watchmen to her sides.  _ Armed with rifles...Cullen wouldn't send Watchmen to their door...Would he? _

Abelas tilts his chin up and speaks plainly. "Commander Rutherford you say?"

"Correct, he is in need of someone with her particular- abilities. She's needed urgently." The expression in her face is a mix of concern and hesitation.

Abelas feels Faline gently grip his arm, hidden by the door. The softest whisper at his side.  _ "This could be a trap. How do we know Cullen sent these people?" _

Abelas pauses a moment.  _ Cullen wasn't supposed to be able to have communication with Izzie at all. Was he able to get a message through? Does he truly need her help? Or is this a ploy by the new Knight Commander to put her "away". _

Faline comes into view from his side and addresses Knight-Commander Pentagast. Her words come abruptly and uneven, "She's not here. She doesn't live here. You have the wrong address."

Abelas eyes the Commander suspiciously. " Is the Commander in danger? Is he hurt?"

Cassandra lets out a labored sigh. "The Commander is fine but-"

Abelas interupts her calmly, "-Lady Isolde is not here. I’m sorry but you have the wrong address."

As Abelas attempts to close the door, he sees a small grin on the Knight Commander's face, as she gently puts her hand on the door, stopping him from closing it completely.

"You must be Sam?..." She says.

Abelas pauses as he looks down at Faline. Hidden behind the door from the Knight Commander's view. Faline's eyes widen as she whispers. " _ Only  _ Cullen calls you that...."

Abelas searches her face a moment as Faline's previously tense posture loosens. They hear Cassandra on the other side of the door again. "I was told that I would have no luck bringing ' _ Izzie' _ to him unless a _ 'Sam'  _ came with her. I don't suppose you would be her protector?"

Abelas lets out a controlled breath, hesitation written on his face as he whispers to Faline, "Go wake her and tell her to get dressed." As Faline swiftly climbs the stairs, Abelas slowly opens the door, tucking his pistol in his waistband. Stern and stiff with his words. "I go where she goes."

Cassandra lets out a relieved sigh. "I understand...."

~

Solas meets Izzie earlier that night in the fade. Eager to show her a spirit who was willing to help. A healer in a past life that could help expand on Izzie's ability. As he drifted to sleep, he hummed  _ Mir Da'len Somniar.  _ Their agreed upon way of letting her know she could join him in the fade. He wonders if eventually, she won’t need his help to enter the fade like he does.

Izzie steps through her mirror more confidently this time. Her vision blurs for a bit, but the transition to Solas’ dream is easier than last time. As her vision clears she sees a small cottage in a large open field, the sun setting in the distance, as Solas walks towards her.

“That was less- disorienting.” She says as she looks down at the grass, feeling it between her toes. She looks up at him as he comes closer. "Where are we?".

"I believe we are in Ferelden somewhere." Solas replies as he smiles warmly and takes her arm ushering her towards the cottage. As they enter, she takes in the small living room and an ethereal spirit in simple clothes kneeling by a fireplace behind a sofa.

She watches the spirit's form become more clear. Her features are more pronounced. The spirit shifts to an older human woman, white hair tied loosely in a bun. The spirit smiles warmly as another spirit appears on the sofa, shifting to a small boy, wavy black hair curled up in a blanket. Solas leads Izzie around the sofa as the woman looks up to her and nods, for her to sit.

Solas watches her as he explains. "Her child had stayed outside in the cold too long."

Izzie kneels next to the woman and looks at the child, light concern in her face at the child's well being. Glancing to Solas a moment who smiles, reminding her this is the fade.

"Reach out and follow her hand" Solas urges her. The woman lightly takes Izzie's hand and hovers it over the boy. Izzie closes her eyes and feels the heat from his forehead. Izzie shakes her head. 

"It's a low fever. Elfroot and soup would do just fine."

The woman gently squeezes Izzie's hand and speaks. "Yes, but there are other ways to heal this as well."

Izzie startles as she realizes she hadn't heard a spirit talk before. The spirit woman grins. Unaffected by her startle as she continues. "It's simple I know, but I thought you would appreciate seeing someone with a similar ability." 

Izzie relaxes and smiles at the spirit as she holds her hand over the boy's head. She begins to feel- an almost tangible feeling of frost in her hand. The spirit transfers her magic to Izzie and applies pressure against the boy's head. Small waves of cooling magic running through him. Izzie breathes a victorious sigh of relief as she feels the inflammation recede. After a moment, the boy smiles and slowly fades away. Izzie beams and looks at the spirit who takes her hand, helping her stand up. A little lightheaded Izzie wobbles a moment. "Whoa." 

Solas rests his hand on the small of her back, "Give it a moment. She pushed her energy to you to show you. Even in the fade, magic can leave one feeling fatigued." Izzie feels her fingers tingle with the magic. The not unpleasant feeling subsiding after a few moments.

Solas lets her go when she steadies herself. "I was pretty sure you already knew how to heal things beneath the surface but-"

Izzie shakes her head. "Sort of. I've typically only been able to heal things I can clearly see. Not always  _ feel  _ in another person. It requires a bit more concentration. " She turns to the spirit. "Thank you."

Solas smiles. "She has offered to help you practice whenever you'd like." 

Izzie's smile widens as she thanks the spirit. Her image slowly fading as does the cottage leaving them in a large wide open field. Rolling hills stretch on for miles. Like the older Val Royeaux they saw. " _ Mmmm".  _ She breathes in the smell of the grass and the cool wind on her face.  _ No putrid smell of the rabbit like last time. _

"Where to next?" She says, turning to Solas at her side.

"I thought maybe you'd like to pick." Hands clasped behind his back. Warm smile on his face.

She ponders a moment. "I'm- not sure i'm ready to see them--not yet."

Solas nods, "There are endless places to explore in the fade. We could-'' He's interrupted as they are startled by a voice.

**_"Izzie, please wake up."_ **

Solas casually looks around to see if he can find the source of the voice. Izzie's pleasant expression turns to worry at the sound of her voice. "Its Faline."

"I believe you are being woken up early." His tone laced with concern as they haven't been asleep that long. He shakes his head. "I don't believe it's morning yet."

Izzie looks at Solas apologetically, "I have to go. I’m sorry Solas-"

**_"Dalen, wake up. It's urgent..."_ **

Her image starts to fade as does her voice. "I'm- sorry."

The last thing she sees is concern in Solas' eyes--

~

"Izzie, wake up!" 

Izzie feels Faline shake her arm, slowly opening her eyes to the woman beside her. She glances to her bedroom window, seeing no light coming through. Izzie's expression turns sour as she meets Faline's eyes. Her short words flow quickly.

"Da'len, I'm going to help you pack a bag. Cullen needs you. It sounds serious. Abelas is going with you. The Knight Commander is downstairs. "

Izzie stares at Faline a moment, trying to take in the rush of information.  _ Deep breath...Izzie.  _ She lifts the covers off herself and scrambles for a bag under her bed, nearly pushing Faline out of the way.  _ Have courage... _ She throws open the bag and points to her jars on her desk. "I want one of each salve or tincture in the bag. Lemme get dressed. Is Cullen ok?"

Faline scrambles to her desk and does what she asks, "Knight Commander Pentagast says he is fine, but it seems there might be some urgency."

Izzie looks up at the window again. "Must be if it couldn't even wait till morning. Do we know anything else?"

Faline shakes her head as she helps her pack an extra set of clothes. "She said she knew you wouldn't come without 'Sam'."

Izzie briefly smiles as she hastily loops a belt around her waist, the little piece of information making her relax slightly amidst being woken up in the middle of the night. "Only Cullen calls him that."

Faline nods as she zips up her bag handing it to her. "That's what I said." Faline huffs and takes a deep breath, holding Izzie by the shoulders. "Go downstairs. I'll pack a bag for Abelas-quickly." Izzie turns to leave before Faline's grip on her shoulders tightens. "Izzie, please be safe. If anything happens to you-"

Izzie's face is tense with nervous energy, but she manages a small smile as she leans her forehead against hers briefly. "I know."

.

Izzie makes her way downstairs. Loose trousers and blouse, she looks for her coat a moment before realizing Abelas standing a few feet from the front door, holding her oversized coat out for her. She shoots him a nervous grin as she loops her arms through. Abelas leans down a moment, whispering in her ear. "It's going to be ok, stay close to me."

She turns to him and nods. "Trust me, I'm not leaving your side." As she looks out the open door, she eyes Commander Pentagast and two Watchmen accompanying her. Cassandra straightens as she meets her gaze. "Thank you for agreeing to come. I'm sorry to wake you like this."

Abelas takes Izzie's hand giving it a squeeze. "It seems, Cullen is only a few hours away."

Cassandra turns and nods to her Watchmen as Faline comes down the stairs. "I hope you don't get seasick. We are taking a small cargo vessel." Cassandra says dryly as the Watchmen take the packed bags from Faline and Izzie to the carriage on the street. 

Faline gives Izzie a worried look. "Dareth Shiral. Send Cullen my love as well."

Izzie looks back. "I'll tell him." 

She manages a nervous smile as Abelas helps her into the carriage.  _ I'm coming Cullen... _

_. _

_.. _

A little ways down the street. Solas runs towards Izzie's. When he gets close he sees the carriage pull away. He briefly takes note of a familiar emblem on the back as it pulls away.  _ Fenedhis... _ No doubt in his mind the vehicle was the new Knight Commander's. He quickly scans the area as he reaches his hand out, his mana pooling to his fingertips as he thinks about rattling the carriage wheels from a distance. He sighs defeatedly, knowing he’s too far away for his shockwave to reach. His heart racing in his chest.  _ Getting caught won’t do me any good….  _ His eyes dart around looking for another option. 

Around a corner he notices a slender figure in the shadows, peering around the building at the carriage. Solas’ brows knit as he focuses his mana. He fade-steps closer to him but his abilities are still- inaccurate. He topples over the figure and feels a small dagger in his ribcage. The sudden rush of adrenaline surges through him in his rash decision. Exposing himself to-

He looks down at the Elf he toppled to the ground. Blonde wisps obscure his features as he lets out a grunt. A heavily Antivan accent following. " _ Heh _ \- usually someone buys me dinner first."

Solas pauses. The dagger at his ribcage not yet piercing the skin. He looks into his eyes sternly as the Elf continues, "I have no qualms with you, but I'd rather not injure an-  _ important  _ person in Lady Isolde's life."

Solas pushes himself off the Elf. Without missing a beat the Antivan brushes himself off and stands up only to be shoved up against the wall of an adjacent building. Solas’ grip on his throat pinning him in place. The dagger falls to the ground. Angrily he questions the elf dressed in black. "Who are you? And where are they taking her?! "

Zevran puts his hands up. "I'm a friend I swear. She doesn't know it yet. But I promise I mean no harm-"

Solas tightens his grip on the Elf.  _ A friend?  _ He considers for a moment to hear him out, but he  _ needs _ to know where the carriage is going to see if he can catch up to it...

He shakes his head angrilly. "Wrong answer. Where are they taking her?!!"

The Elf gasps for air, his hands clawing at Solas' tightening grip, but no fear in his eyes. Only a smirk he'd love to wipe off his smug face. "-She'll be fine. You have my word. She-"

He  _ almost  _ released him. Knew he should try to reason with him.  _ Too late... _

Suddenly an odd, cold drip of liquid runs down Solas' neck, a small pinch of pain follows as his vision blurs. His gaze drops as his body falls to the ground. He hears the subtle sound of footsteps as another figure comes into view, struggling to remain conscious as he hears a soft Orlesian voice above him.

"I'm sorry, but where she goes. You can not follow."

Solas cranes his neck to get a better view of the voice above him. Only a shadow hovers above him as he blinks. He notes a glass syringe in the figures' hand, illuminated by moonlight. His vision fades to darkness as his ears start to ring. "Sleep. You'll feel better in the morning."

Solas' chest tightens as he succumbs to a deep sleep....

.

..

....

.....


	16. The Circle, Part 1

The speed of the carriage picks up, along with her anxiety, as Izzie fidgets relentlessly with a seam of her loose blouse. Trying to gain some purchase for her trembling nerves. Feeling grateful that Abelas was asking the questions for her.

"Where is the ship taking us?" Abelas questions Knight Commander Pentagast.

Cassandra replies, " Across the Waking Sea. Once we reach port, you will travel horseback to the compound. One of Commander Cullen's men will meet you at the front gate and take you to him."

Abelas raises his brow, "Compound? Is that what we are calling the Circle now?"

Izzie abruptly looks at Abelas. Wide-eyed shock that he knew somehow. She stiffens as she knows this was not supposed to be common knowledge yet. 

Cassandra shuffles in her seat. The first sign she's shown that she was uncomfortable at all. She clears her throat as she replies. "Yes- for the moment. I'm hopeful that soon it won't be a secret any longer. I'd rather the public be informed."

Abelas nods, his features softening slightly. "I assume that decision is not up to you."

Cassandra nods and looks out the window. "Correct."

Izzie's eyes drop, darting back and forth at the floor of the carriage.  _ I'm not asking you to come into the light.- I want you safe, more than anything else... _

She feels Abelas loop his arm through hers, his other hand giving her arm a small squeeze. She looks up and gives him a small smile. His normal stern expression softens a moment, calming her nerves a little. Izzie leans into him as she remembers Cullen's words, a few days before he left.

" _ That 'Sam' fellow says he's worked security before. You were right. He's gifted too. I've hired him to keep an eye on things. I don't like that I won't be able to send you letters. Maybe I'm just paranoid but-" _

_ "Cullen? Are you-- afraid?" _

_ "No, I just--I don't know. I just want you safe. That's all." _

_ "I'll be fine Cullen. I love you. I'll be safe I promise." _

When he left for basic training 4 years ago, he had no reason to believe her life was in danger. But since then... Knowing that it was even the  _ slightest  _ possibility, Cullen had made sure he wasn't going to lose her.

.

.

The carriage comes to a stop as they exit. Izzie blinks through her tired eyes and pulls her coat around her as Cassandra ushers them to a small boat at the dock. One of the Watchmen follows them, bags in hand and addresses her. 

"I'll be taking you the rest of the way Miss." Izzie nods but looks to Cassandra. 

"This is Officer Daniel. I'm afraid I have to stay behind. One of my people will come pick you up when you are ready to leave. I hope you can help Commander Cullen... Before you go- I'd like to ask both of you... If I can count on your discretion? The details are more- sensitive."

Seriousness in Abelas' face. "We were never there."

Cassandra nods, "Good. Maker guide you."

.

The 'cargo vessel' was little more than a fishing boat with a small cabin. Assorted shipping containers and barrels lined the small cabin as Abelas finds a spot for them to sit on a crate below deck.

"Have you been on a ship before?" He asks her once they are alone.

"Yes actually, my father took me fishing a few times when I was young." She pauses a moment and lets out a nervous laugh. "I'm more nervous about riding a horse once we get to port." Abelas nods as he motions for her to sit next to him. She smiles faintly as she joins him. "That among other things..."

"Cullen would not have sent for you if it meant you would be in danger."

"I know, I'm most concerned about Commander Pentagast's-  _ urgency.  _ I'm not sure what to expect when we get there. That and if-..." She shakes her head and lightly shrugs. “If Cullen has told people about me.”

Her voice quiets and Abelas nods, “Commander Pentagast said something about needing someone with your  _ “abilities”.  _ I'm assuming that means she knows.”

Izzie stiffens at that, taking a shuddering breath and focusing on what that means for her...and possibly Abelas. Her eyes search the floor. Abelas watches her tense, offering an observation he hopes helps. 

“Commander Pentagast was very tight lipped about  _ who  _ needed help or healing. That it was  _ sensitive  _ information. I hope that an honorable woman- like her, would extend the same-  _ discretion .  _ I believe she knew she was asking a lot of you...on Cullen’s behalf.”

Izzie nods in agreement but stares at the wood floor. She wonders if it’s the sway of the boat or her nerves that is making her stomach flip.

Abelas sighs watching her. When Cullen hired him, he had initially suspected that he would be her-  _ bodyguard _ , so to speak. He knew Cullen had cause to be concerned for her well being. That was the job- Keep her safe- But the more he and Izzie talked, the more this felt more than a job. Like somehow he was placed in her life for a reason. Perhaps he could find a deeper purpose this way. He had been called to protect before. His job before was similar in nature but- different now. He was never  _ close  _ or  _ friendly  _ with Mythal or any of his fellow Elvhen for that matter. Had never  _ cared  _ for someone like Izzie.

He smiles faintly for a moment and then it fades... For all her playful nudges and casual conversation, he's surprised she hasn't asked him about his ability. He knows Cullen told her.

"Izzie?"

"Yes?"

Abelas clears his throat. "You- haven't asked about my gift..." 

Izzie looks at him at her side. Hesitantly she replies, "I- didn't want to put you on the spot. Not everyone is comfortable with- I wasn’t going to ask you to  _ prove it _ , or imply I didn’t think you could protect me."

He nods in understanding. "Would it help- if.... Can I show you? I don't think I'll need to use it where we are going, but I want you to know you can count on me, should the need arrive."

She looks around him at the cabin door, then back at him. A warmth in her eyes before she slowly nods. He instantly summons his barrier, surrounding them. Izzie eyes widen with fascination at the blue energy on her skin, wrapping around them. She looks up at him and smiles. Feeling the tingle of magic before it slowly subsides.

"That's  _ incredible _ ...Truly." Her wide smile softens as her eyes meet the floor again. "Abelas- It's not like I don't trust you-"

Abelas gives her a warm smile. "I know, but I want you to feel safe. Don't hesitate to ask me anything."

"I won't. Thank you." She says, as her soft smile returns.

.

..

They arrive just outside of Lydes, not far from the Winter Palace. They are quickly escorted to another contact who provides them with three horses. Abelas starts to mount his, when it hits him.  _ He forgot she only has one hand to hold on to the reins.  _ He shakes his head and helps her on her horse and slides on behind her, holding her tight to him as he wraps an arm around her waist. When they are settled, Officer Daniel takes the lead on his horse. An hour passes as Izzie starts to doze off until the cold wind picks up. The chill keeping her awake as well as the movement of the horse. Thankful Abelas has a firm grip on her so she won't fall off. 

.

It's almost early morning, as they make their way to Sahrnia. A small town on the edge of the mountain range. The sound of the horses’ hooves grow louder against the cobblestone path winding between the small shops and houses surrounding them. As they make their way, Izzie wonders if she'll fall asleep before they reach their destination, but as they round another street she sees a military base come into view through the snow covered trees. Thick concrete walls with two guard towers, a large steel door in the center nearly four stories high. A heavy fog covers the ground, clearing up as they trot closer. Abelas notices that the base is surrounded by remnants of stone ruins. Officer Daniel dismounts as they come to the door. Abelas holds her still as he gets off, helping her down. Their feet crunch against the compacted snow and ice as she loops her arm in his.

"What used to be here?" Abelas asks Officer Daniel.

"I believe it was an Elven fortress hundreds of years ago, this base was built on top of it. _ Suledin Keep _ I believe is what it was." He motions for them to follow as he makes his way to the intercom. A guard comes down a tower to open the steel doors for them. 

"Commander Cullen has been expecting you. Are you the healer?"Asks the guard.

"Yes." She nods.

"This way."

There's an open training yard that doesn't look like it gets used, covered in snow. Several smaller buildings scatter the perimeter save for-. “Woah.” Izzie takes a moment to take in the massive tower in the middle. Almost as wide as ' _ The Ritz'  _ but definitely taller, and round. They make their way through the door of the tower opening up into what looks like a mess hall. She sees an elevator door open on the opposite wall straight ahead...

_ Cullen! _

Cullen stops in his tracks as he sees them coming towards him. Tension in his face but a widening smile the closer she gets.  _ Thank the Maker... _ Izzie smiles as Abelas lets her arm go. Her pace quickened even through her exhaustion. Cullen nods and addresses them. 

"Thank you Officer, I can take it from here. The barracks are around the corner. Get some rest." Cullen dismisses Daniel who hands their bags to Abelas. Cullen motions to them. "Come with me."

As they follow him through the elevator Izzie glances at Cullen. Her heart thumping loudly in her chest at the sight of him. Clean shaven but his curls are disheveled. He looks tense and exhausted too. "So this is it?" She asks.

His words flow unsteadily . "Yes, I- I’m sorry this must be--I’m sure you didn't expect to be woken up in the middle of the night like this."

Izzie smiles wide as he hits a button for the top floor. "It's good to see you."

Cullen straightens and clasps his hands behind his back as the doors close. He leans towards her whispering as they ascend the elevator. _"I missed you too sweetheart."_

__ He clears his throat as he hides a grin turning to Abelas. "Thank you-  _ Sam  _ for bringing her- for keeping her safe."

Abelas nods and grins slightly as Izzie chimes in, small smirk in the corner of her lips, "And what do you need of my - _ abilities _ -Commander Cullen?"

Cullen's posture shifts, more serious. He starts slowly. "There's- a mage that has become ill. He overdosed on Magebane. His skin is yellow and he can't keep anything down. I don’t know if you can help but I-" He pauses, he shakes his head. His voice quiet again.  __ “I didn’t know what else to do. We don’t have anyone who can heal like you can.”

Izzie nods, smiling faintly at first..."Magebane? How the hell did he ingest that?" Izzie's browline creases.

Cullen sighs, "We keep a private stash in case--in case someone's abilities gets-  _ too much _ . It's not something we give to people unless deemed necessary.  _ This  _ particular mage takes it by choice."

The elevator comes to a stop as Izzie's ears pop at the increase in elevation. The door opens to a long hallway wrapping around the building. This floor of the military base looks  _ very _ different. There's a beautiful violet floor running rug and even a couple paintings on the concrete walls. As Cullen takes them down the hall they stop at two doors. One to her left and one on the right. 

"Why does this mage take Magebane?" Izzie questions Cullen.

He stops them at a door on the right, pinching the bridge of his nose. He sighs, "Because he has a hard time controlling his ability. He hates it, and he hates being here. His frustration makes his ability- erratic...unstable"

Cullen's expression falls as he looks into Izzie's eyes. His hand on the door handle, not wanting to open it yet. He looks like he's about to apologize.  _ What can't you just tell me?  _ She thinks. Izzie takes a deep breath. "What gift does he have that causes so much stress?" She asks.

A heavy pause before Cullen opens the door....

"He- manipulates fire...There is more to it than that but- did the Knight Commander mention discretion being important?"

She shrugs, "Yes, she didn't elaborate."

Cullen nods. "You'll see."

Cullen opens the door to a spacious room lined with fancy sofas and recliners all singed and burnt in various places. A bed with the mage in question in the corner of the room, curled up under a duvet. A woman in finer clothes sits on a stool next to him. Beautiful deep russet brown skin with an elegant Orlesian accent.

"George dear, you need to take it. I'm not asking again." She holds out a couple of larger pills in her hand to him. Izzie walks to the edge of the bed and notes the bottle in her other hand.  _ Antibiotics _ ...

The room is dimly lit and well decorated. She had assumed the Circle wouldn't look grand in any way but- this was much nicer than she expected. Cullen sighs as he makes his way to Izzie's side, crossing his arms. "George would you mind telling my-associate here how much Magebane you think you had?"

The covers rustle as a head pops up. Short dark hair and trimmed goatee cover his yellowed skin. Gruff and annoyed the young man barks at Cullen. "This the healer you sent for? Special contact or something you said. I told you I'm fine- and if I'm  _ not _ then just let me die here in this damned- forsaken place."

Cullen sighs heavily,"You know very well why I can't just let you die under my care. "

George sits up in his lavish bed, he folds his hands as he adjusts his position, followed by a huff. "Yes, wouldn't want my  _ father _ to come down here to your  _ precious _ Circle-"

Izzie's heart thumps loud as she notes the ring on the man's un-covered hand bearing the royal crest.  _ Prince George! Second in line to the throne...The king's son is a mage! Ahh...That explains why he suddenly re-instated the Circle. _

"Thats enough!" The woman sitting next to him says. "I didn't come to babysit an arrogant brat. I came to teach a Prince how to control his Maker given abilities. I'll not have you use that tone while there is a guest present." She shoves the pills in his hand as he reluctantly takes them. She turns to Izzie. "Forgive his unkind words my dear, you do not deserve to be treated as such. Where are my manners? My name is Vivienne. Madame De Fer if you'd like. I serve the Crown and act within the advisory board."

Izzie pauses a moment unsure how to introduce herself. "A pleasure Madame De Fer," Izzie nods politely, "Lady Isolde."

Cullen clears his throat, "My Lady I'm sure you are exhausted from your trip but if you could look him over it would be greatly appreciated."

Izzie nods and looks to Prince George who shuffles a bit. "May I?"

The Prince huffs, shrugs and rolls his eyes, "By all means."

Abelas stands behind Izzie helping her take off her coat as Cullen pulls over another stool for her. She holds out her arm to Abelas. "Can you?" Abelas nods and rolls her sleeve up for her. Prince George eyes her other sleeve, tied off at the elbow.

"What happened there?" The Prince asks, as he tilts his chin up.

Izzie sits and pauses a moment...

"A fire." She says dryly. Her arm stretches out over him, her magic slowly radiating through him starting at his forehead. The Prince speaks again.

"Couldn't heal that could you?" His chiding tone lightly puts her on edge as she continues searching for- something as she makes her way to his chest. Madame De Fer starts to scold the Prince, "What did I say about-"

Izzie cuts her off, "No...I couldn't heal that, but clearly I survived, which means you will too." She says matter of factly.

The Prince grumbles and leans back as she hovers her hand over his stomach. Cullen turns around hiding his flushed face and small grin that only Abelas catches out of his peripheral. Hiding his own grin in the process. Izzie grimaces as she hovers over his stomach, concentrating as she presses her hand over his liver. The Prince finally shows concern for his own well being. 

"What is it?"

Cullen turns back around watching Izzie intently as she focuses on the area. She breathes deeply, trying to feel beneath the surface. Sensing inflammation. It takes her a moment but she thinks she can feel-  _ something more _ .

A wave of exhaustion hits her as she takes a deep breath retracting her hand. Shaking her head. "Too many- toxins in his liver. I'm sorry Cul-Commander Cullen, I need a minute."

Vivienne reaches into a bag next to her and pulls out a blue vial handing it to her.  _ Refined Lyrium... _ She takes the vial. "It's safe dear I promise."

Izzie looks to Cullen who looks anxious. "I haven't- taken any yet. I'm not sure how it affects-  _ healers _ as opposed to Templars. I just know it can enhance your ability for a while."

Izzie looks at the vial in her hand and takes a moment.  _ Just this once... _ She takes the top off and downs it in one gulp, feeling her body tingle in seconds. She reaches out immediately as she feels the rush, placing her hand over his stomach again. She closes her eyes as she breathes deeply.  _ Beneath the surface, past the inflamation. There it is. Not just toxins, but scarring.  _ She focuses her energy, healing the internal scarring left by the overuse of the Magebane. Her magic subsides as does the jaundice of the Prince's skin. 

She opens her eyes to see a pleased look on Madame De Fer's face. The Prince looks relieved as well, as Izzie looks up to Cullen standing next to her. He smiles wide until her stomach turns and the room spins. 

"Oof."

She feels Abelas’ hand on her back as her skin suddenly feels clammy. Cullen kneels to her level, coming into her eye-line. Izzie lets out a wavering breath. "I think I need to lie down."

Cullen smiles through his worried expression, "Yes, I think you do. Sam?"

"I've got her." 

She feels Abelas scoop her up in his arms as she succumbs to her exhaustion.

.

..

  
  



	17. The Circle, Part 2

Chapter 17

Izzie stirs as daylight peeks through a curtain. The faint heat from the sunlight feels nice. She sits up slowly and looks around to find herself on a cot in a smaller room surrounded by bookcases. As she scans the room she sees piles of books on a table to her right. To her left another cot, Abelas sleeping soundly, curled up on his side. She looks down, still in her clothes from the previous day, a blanket draped over her as well as both  _ her _ coat and  _ Abelas _ ' coat covering her. She glances over at him again, wrapped up in just a blanket. She smiles as she watches his large shoulders rise and fall in time with his breathing _ , that was sweet of him, but is he warm enough? _

There's a soft knock at the door that causes him to startle. He quickly rolls over toward her and reaches for her hand. His barrier immediately surrounds them in a blue haze. Izzie freezes as her eyes lock with Abelas, her heart beating rapidly in her chest. After a moment they hear an unsteady voice on the other side.

"Umm I was told to deliver some uh- sustenance to um- here. I'm Delrin... Delrin Barris, uh Lieutenant Barris actually, I- Commander Cullen sent me?"

Izzie softly smiles at Abelas. He relaxes, letting her hand go and dropping his barrier. He looks over his shoulder. Letting out a tired sigh, "You may come in."

Lieutenant Barris strides in with a metal tray of assorted muffins, toast, jams, a few strips of bacon and two apples. "I'm sorry, It's not a lot- just left overs from this morning's breakfast. Commander Cullen said he'd be by later and take you on a tour."

Abelas nods appreciatively as he stands and meets him halfway across the room, taking the tray. "Thank you Lieutenant. Do you happen to have the time?"

"Little after thirteen hundred Sir." Barris looks around him at Izzie. "Are you the healer? "

She pauses a moment, hesitant at first, then smiles softly, "Yes." 

"You're the one- the Commander sent for. We're glad you're here. We don't have a healer."

Abelas looks back at her as she replies, "I- don't think I'm staying, but I'm glad to help."

The Lieutenant looks a little confused but nods. "If you'd like there's a washroom one floor below us. Shower and fresh towels for your use." 

"Thank you," She smiles."Um- what floor are we on?"

"13th floor Miss."

"Thank you." She sighs and smiles as he turns and leaves them privacy, shutting the door behind them.

Abelas comes back, sitting across from Izzie on his cot. The tray on his lap between them, looking over the assortment of food. "My apologies. I didn't mean to startle you. When Cullen and I brought you in here last night, I noticed the door had no lock. Anyone could have come in."

"It's okay. I was beginning to wake up actually." She smiles at him and sets his coat to the side.

"How are you feeling?" He asks as he takes a piece of toast. 

Izzie takes a muffin and rotates her left shoulder. Winching as she feels a pinch. "Little stiff but just fine. Were you cold last night? You didn't have to give me your coat."

Abelas swipes the jam over a piece of toast. "I slept fine. I -- " He pauses, setting his knife down, looking her in the eyes. "After you fell asleep you shivered. I thought perhaps you were cold. Madame De Fer said you might do that. A side effect of the lyrium you took. Apparently it can make you- shake, if you're not used to it."

"Oh...I feel well actually. Thank you, that was sweet of you." She says, prompting a small smile from him. As they eat she looks around them at the bookshelves behind her and scattered tables and chairs surrounding their cots. Abelas tries to answer the questions he can see swimming in her mind. 

"Cullen said we wouldn't be disturbed on this level. Said it will be a library eventually once the clutter is cleared out and the books are organized. He didn't want to put us in the barracks with the other Templars. Less questions and prying eyes." 

"Ahh." She smiles to herself. "The lieutenant that stopped by was curious enough."

She finishes her muffin after a few bites and grabs a book from a nearby table, coming back and sitting on her cot across from Abelas. 

He watches her as he finishes his toast."Spell book?"

She nods as she scans the pages. "Reminds me of the ones in Flemeth's old room. I wonder if there are healing spells in here." 

Abelas nods as he wipes his hands on a napkin, "I'm sure somewhere in here, there are tomes with healing incantations." He pauses, "However, I’m sure they are not as powerful as someone born with the ability."

Izzie nods and smiles at his response. "I suppose- that could be true."

.

After they finish their meal, they head down a floor to the washroom Barris mentioned. Abelas stands guard outside, hands folded behind his back as Izzie showers and changes into her spare outfit she packed. He closes his eyes a moment, hearing the rumble of the elevator. His eyes open to see the Prince coming down the hall towards him. George cocks his head toward the washroom. "Lady- Isolde?" He points casually at the door.

Abelas looks at him blankly.

Prince George sighs, "Ah, I just wanted to tell her,  _ thank you _ . And I'm sorry I was an ass last night." He stands up right, as he clasps his hands behind his back, mirroring Abelas pose. Smug expression rising to his face. "- and I wanted to see if she would like a tour-"

Abelas suppresses a scoff as he watches Vivienne stride behind him quietly from around the corner. She stands behind him, arms crossed as she interrupts him.

"A tour? Oh, I'm certain Commander Cullen will see to that. Now get back to your quarters, you need rest. I'm sure Lady Isolde would prefer you out of her hair for the time being."

Prince George huffs as Abelas tries not to smirk . He nods. "Isolde and I will be by, at some point I'm sure to-- reassess your condition." 

George nods, his previous smug smile wiped off his face as he huffs. Turning to head up the nearby elevator as Vivienne watches him leave. After a beat she lets out a labored sigh.

"Nobles I can deal with, but royalty...My apologies, I don't believe I caught your name last night?" She says as she drops her arms to her sides.

Abelas nods respectfully. "Sam"

Vivienne's brows knit ever so slightly, disbelief in her voice. "I see.... Well it was a pleasure. I do hope you two got enough sleep last night. Is she feeling all right?" She says with a courteous smile.

Abelas nods, "She is well. Thank you Madame De Fer."

Vivienne nods graciously as she turns and leaves Abelas to his thoughts. He closes his eyes once again, hearing the water faucet turn off in the washroom. He does not hear footsteps on this level at the moment. Mostly empty rooms- save for the private bathroom. He ponders that as the Circle grows, the rooms will fill. He knows of Circles and Templars. Aware of their history and the struggle to find balance. He thinks about Cullen's previous worries when he came by to hire him. It all made sense now. He had a feeling the "changes'' coming might look like this. 

He more than understands the need for those with gifts to learn to use them. Glad the Crown isn't just trying to- supress and force people hide it.  _ If this could truly be a safe place for people to expand and grow their abilities...  _ Abelas shakes his head, thinking to himself.  _ History may choose to repeat itself unfortunately.  _ Sooner or later, people fear magic. Fear what they can not understand or-  _ chose  _ not to understand. Eventually the Chantry-- and then the Templars feed into that fear and assert more control. Then the inevitable pushback when Mages rise against those who abuse their power. The world plunges into chaos and then...silence, as the world slowly rebuilds and the cycle repeats.

_ That's what the history books will say...  _ It's not as if they could go back to the way things were in the age of the Elvhenan. Magic was everywhere and nearly everyone had it...But it corrupted his people. The Evanuris emerged and toyed with the world in ways they shouldn't have. It brought the Elvhen people to war with themselves. Pushing  _ one _ of them to create the veil as punishment for their greed and thirst for power.

Abelas takes a deep breath. His thoughts turned melancholy.  _ There must be a better way.  _ He thinks back to when Mythal asked him to be her Champion. Her  _ enduring _ Sentinel tasked with keeping their history intact in the  _ Vir Abelasan _ . Her way of hoping someday, that knowledge would be passed to- someone. Someone who might figure out how  _ not _ to repeat the mistakes of the past...

.

Izzie comes out a few minutes later and nudges his arm. He turns and looks down towards her. Violet vest over her white blouse, paired with loose brown trousers. He smiles as he smells the lavender aroma wafting from the steam filled washroom. The ends of her hair slightly wet and pulled back in a ponytail. Her oversized coat folded over her arm.

"Did you want to-" She gestures to the washroom. 

"Perhaps when-" Abelas hears the elevator climb again and smiles as they watch as Cullen steps off. "-perhaps while Cullen takes you on a tour."

Cullen trots towards them, lighter on his feet. The previous tension from the night before seemingly lifted as he beams at them. His hair is combed back and his navy blue uniform is pressed. "Did you get enough sleep? Enough to eat?" He asks them.

"Yes, thank you." Izzie replies. Abelas nods.

Cullen looks down the hall a moment looking around. His voice lowers slightly. "My lady, would you care for a tour?" He looks pensive but with an unmistakable grin in the corner of his mouth she'd love to kiss.

"I'd love to." She smiles as he motions her to join him. 

Cullen looks back at Abelas, "You're welcome to join us once you've-"

Feeling more confident that they are safe here, Abelas smiles softly. "Perhaps I shall."

~

Cullen presses the button for the 15th floor. As the elevator door closes he feels the need to fill her in a little. "Prince George goes by 'Fredrick' here. No one is supposed to know he's the King's son. Although he doesn't do a very good job hiding that information. His and Lady Vivienne's quarters are the top floor. My office is on the 15th."

Izzie gives him a playful grin as he looks at her at his side. "Your- office?" 

His smile widens. "Uh, yes I- need something- there first. Before I take you anywhere else."

She smiles wide at him, watching him poorly hide his blush as he looks down. As they step off the floor, a hallway wraps around the building passing a similar washroom. His quarters to the right, his office to the left. He unlocks the door, promptly turning around to lock it, shutting the small shutters over his window.

"What did you need in here-?" She says as she scans his office.

"You." He spins her around instantaneously, taking her by the waist by surprise. His lips finding hers promptly as he holds her tightly against him. He coaxes her lips apart and passionately kisses her as she sighs and melts in his hands. He leans her back slightly as he mumbles against her lips.

"A kiss...I needed-" He sighs between kisses. "I needed to kiss you."

She moans softly into his mouth as one of his hands finds its way up through her hair, tilting her head for him to get a better angle. His tongue delves deeper as he pulls her into him. She stands on her toes, gliding her hand through his curls at the base of his neck. Letting her body go slack as Cullen dips her more, holding her tight against him.

"I might-- _ Mmm-  _ be biased-"

He grins as he lets her up for air, switching to kissing her neck and collarbone. Her head leans back allowing him access. She chuckles as she continues.

"-but this might be the best part of the tour."

He chuckles low against her neck, the sound making her knees go weak as he drags his lips over hers again. His kisses slow down, turning softer and sweeter, as he then plants a tender kiss on both temples. He pulls back and cups her jaw in his hand. His other hand wrapped firmly around her waist.  _ Finally alone _ . The need to tell her everything he's been holding back since she got here, overwhelms him. He  _ did  _ just sneak her into the Circle after all. He’s sure she has questions of her own. He trips over his words. "I- was worried you- that you'd be angry with me- I know you didn't expect me to send for you. I was worried Cassandra wouldn't get through to-"

"-Calling him Sam was clever. Confirmed it was truly you trying to get a message through."

He lets out a heavy sigh of relief, securing his hold around her waist as he leans back to look her in the eyes. "I needed  _ you- _ I didn't know what else to do. Vivienne was worried about organ failure. He couldn’t get down water."

"I'm glad you brought me here. His liver was indeed failing. The scarring ran deep. He should be okay now, as long as he doesn't over do the Magebane.” She sighs against his chest. “I've missed you." 

"I missed you too." He tucks his head into her neck, speaking softly. "You're not mad at all?"

"Mad? No... Nervous? Yes- but I'm much better now." She says with a smile as he buries his head into her neck, his lips drag slowly and sensually against her skin as he holds her tight...Izzie sighs as she feels his body slump into her. Relieved she was finally seeing  _ her _ Cullen. The burden of  _ Commander  _ previously weighing on him.

His fingers wove through her hair, pulling gently as he kissed her. Not wanting to let go.  _ His Izzie was here _ . He pulled back and smiled at her warmly as he leaned his forehead against hers. Kissing the tip of her nose. "I love you."

"I love you too." She runs her hand over his perfect warm face. "Cullen?"

"Hmm?" He nuzzles his nose against hers. 

"Does Cassandra know about  _ us _ ?"

Cullen nods. "Yes. I trust her. She came and visited the Circle. We had a long, deep discussion. She believes someone like you should be allowed to help wherever you may be needed. Not confined to the Circle. You needn't worry about her making you register. Same goes for Sam."

Izzie pulls back and smiles. Surprise that Commander Pentagast understood their situation. An unregistered magic user engaged to the Commander of the Templars. It put him in a precarious situation should Gaspard discover their relationship. She pauses a moment. "What about Madame De Fer?"

Cullen's shoulders drop as he sighs. "She--  _ might.  _ However, I'm sure I can convince her to keep it to herself, seeing as how you just saved the King's son, that we  _ both _ let fall ill in our care. Neither of us want it to get back to the King and  _ especially _ not Gaspard. Although..."

"What is it?"

He looks pensive, until he shakes his head and nuzzles his nose into her hair. "It's nothing."

She frowns at him. "I know that look. It's not nothing."

Cullen sighs as he kisses her forehead. "I ran into Lady Vivienne in the hall. She said you and Sam looked. ' _ Precious'... _ I don't know if that means she thinks you and Sam are together or if she secretly knows- you are  _ mine _ or-." He shakes his head and sighs. "I don't know. He- does seem rather-  _ fond  _ of you."

Izzie's eyebrows arch. "You know nothing is going on-"

"I know. I'm not saying that-" He stammers then lets out a heavy sigh. "I'm sorry. I- might be a little jealous." He confesses. His hand comes up and grazes her cheek as he looks deep in her eyes. "I- would have liked to- have carried you into my room last night instead." He gives her a warm smile, his amber eyes pulling on her heart as he says it.

She returns his smile. "I would have liked that too. He  _ is _ warming up to me. I can see where that conclusion could have been drawn."

"You have that effect on people. You certainly did on me." He kisses her forehead tenderly. "I don't recall seeing him smile before."

Izzie chuckles. "You remember what Morrigan was like when we were kids? If I can soften  _ her,  _ enough for her to call me her  _ sister _ , I think I can soften Abelas." She says matter of factly.

Cullen chuckles low. His heart warms at the thought. He remembers when Morrigan said it. Called her ' _ sister'  _ after the incident. The bright smile on Izzie's face when Morrigan smiled back at her. The idea that she still had a family that loved her, even if it wasn't the family she was born into, drastically improved her healing process. He was glad to see Abelas care for her as well. Glad she was comfortable around him, especially if he was protecting her in his absence.

Cullen sighs. "I should probably show you around,-somewhere beside my office."

She looks around his office finally, two large windows looking out over the snow covered mountains, glistening in the sunlight, a few chairs and a large desk. She chuckles to herself and shakes her head.

Cullen smiles wide. "I know that look." 

His warm gaze makes her heart flip, the heat rising to her face. She pulls him down to her to whisper low in his ear. "I was just thinking about how you could-- show me how sturdy your- desk is... _ Commander '' She _ looks up to him with a coy smile as she punctuates her words, leaving them to fall off her lips seductively. She watches him swallow hard, his eyes half lidded and heavy. He shakes his head leaning down, biting the corner of his lip, before whispering back.

"I’m sure it is-  _ quite sturdy.  _ As much as I’d love to-  _ show you.  _ "

She laughs quietly, "I love you."

"I know." He says as he gives her one last tender kiss.

.

As Cullen leads Izzie outside, to the snow covered courtyard, he points at the various buildings. "Barracks for the Templars are down here, Mages use the tower accommodations. The armory, kitchen and such are in the smaller buildings." He says as he nods to a mage who passes them. He continues as Izzie looks around, walking side by side. "Some rooms in these buildings are still a bit of a mess. Hasn't been anyone using this part of the base in a long time." 

Izzie looks around the snow covered buildings. Squinting at the sunlight reflecting off the snow nearly blinding her. She holds her hand over her eyes. " _ This _ part of the base? What do you mean?"

Cullen hesitates a moment as he stops and turns to her. Standing in the middle of the courtyard. No more than a dozen people move about the grounds. He squints as he points to a small bunker off to the corner that looks different than the rest. Stone, patched with masonry, adorned with a large round, metal door. " _ That  _ part of the base is what has been around the longest. The ruins of the structure before run deep. Below is where-...." Cullen pauses, before he continues quietly. "When- the previous Knight Commander locked up " _ dangerous magic users _ '' or those who committed crimes with their abilities.  _ That _ \- is where they are kept."

Fear and anger twists in her gut.  _ Away...This is where they go?..  _ "Cullen, are you saying-- that there is a prison below us filled with-"

He lets out a heavy sigh. It gives him no pleasure telling her this. "Yes, those who were deemed criminals are kept below in containment cells lined with runes to keep their abilities at bay. Some- some have been there since my Uncle was a Templar...I've been working with Lady Vivienne and an artificer to help those that don't deserve to be locked up. Those whose only crime was being gifted. In fact our artificer should be bringing one up to the surface soon to be released."

The scowl on her face softening as she takes in his words. "I'm sensing the reason Meredith was let go?"

"That is one reason, although there is more to it. Gaspard wants--" He cuts himself off as he sees someone behind Izzie. "Ahh! Our arcanist. Here she is. You'll like her."

  
Cullen and Izzie watch as a dwarven woman exits the bunker, following close behind her a pale human man with long ragged, obsidian hair wearing an oversized coat and loose trousers. He shields his eyes from the sunlight as the dwarf motions for him to follow her. As they approach, Izzie pays attention to the man following her.  _ He almost looks sickly. _ Cullen addresses the dwarf. "Good afternoon, Miss Dagna."

The dwarf nods to Cullen. "Commander, this is Levyn. His abilities are stable-"

Izzie interjects immediately. "But is  _ he _ stable? He looks sick."

Cullen smiles faintly and motions for her to check his condition. Izzie steps closer to the man as he trembles. "I won't hurt you. I promise. I just want to see if you are ok. Levyn? My name is Isolde. I'm a healer. Can I see if there's anything I can do to help?"

He pulls back a little at first then nods and leans forward. Izzie gets on her toes to reach him, resting her hand on his forehead. Dagna quietly addresses Izzie at her side. "He hasn't seen the light of day in a long time. He's not malnourished. Just lacking vitamin D."

Izzie looks over the man and his pale complexion. Not sensing anything in particular she retracts her hand. She sees Cullen out of the corner of her eye motion for Lieutenant Barris. "Take him inside and see that he gets his own room. I'll be there later after he settles in to check on him."

Izzie smiles faintly through the overwhelming sadness she can sense from him, as Lieutenant Barris takes him inside. She turns to Cullen as her heart then swells with pride.  _ Her Cullen, making a difference. _

Dagna looks over Izzie a moment. Her eyes travel to her left arm. Her oversized coat hiding the end of her arm. Dagna turns to Cullen. "Is this? "

Cullen grins and looks around for eavesdroppers, then at Izzie lovingly. "My lady, there is one person I didn't mention before that knows who you are- and knows about-  _ us _ ..."

Dagna smiles wide at Izzie. It takes her a second as she looks at the happy dwarf. "I think- I think I remember you. A long time ago... Did you used to come visit my father?"

"Yes! Wasn't' sure you'd remember me, but I used to come by and pick Mordin's brain about his inventions. I-" Her face saddens as she continues. "I wrote Morrigan after what happened and found out you survived. Im so- so sorry for your loss. "

"Thank you." Izzie smiles softly. " I thought your name sounded familiar. It's been too many years. Good to see you again." 

Cullen's face softens at their reunion. "We made the connection when I mentioned I knew Lady Morrigan." 

Dagna comes closer looking around and checking for eavesdroppers as she whispers to Izzie. "The Commander was thrilled he got to tell someone he was engaged. Congratulations." She beams at Izzie who smiles at her gesture.

Cullen clears his throat and smiles. "Shall we proceed with the tour?"

"Yes." 

_. _

Dagna takes Izzie and Cullen to see her laboratory. Various books and several sketches spread out across the floor as well as the counters lining the room. On her desk lay large stone slabs with more scattered notes. "I'm working on more runes- to help with stabilizing the people that have a hard time controlling their gifts. Some of these are just placed in their room under their bed- some enchantments are made into pendants and amulets to help stabilize them throughout the day."

Cullen comments, "Many mages gifts are affected by their emotions. Fear of one's gift can make it unstable unfortunately."

Izzie nods as she strolls through her workspace, not unlike her fathers study, simply larger in scale. She smiles surveying the miscellaneous pieces of materials. Jars of dried herbs, Rashvine, Black Lotus, Elfroot,and Felandaris on the counters..Bloodstone, Dawnstone and Silverite ore, are organized in different crates under a table. Izzie gives a curious expression as she thumbs over a sketch on the table. "Dagna? Is this?"

Dagna peers at the sketch in her hand. "Ah yes, a prosthesis. Gaspard wanted me to look into creating a movable one for military personnel that-um.-- Well- ones that become dis-"

"I get it." Izzie says dryly as she looks at the sketch, blank and motionless. 

Cullen watches her gaze at the sketch. "Izzie?"

She looks to Dagna, "How far along are you? Is this just the initial design?"

She replies, "This was the initial design, yes. I know it's a bit clunky but I worked on it with my father. He's a blacksmith..." The dwarf crosses the room to a wooden box, rummaging through it. "I have a contact in Val Royeaux that has been helpful with a more ergonomic design. It'll be sleeker eventually, but this one is fabricated to fit anyone...hopefully. I have yet to try it on anyone-'' She says as she smiles uneasily at Izzie, hoping she'd take the bait.

Izzie's face brightens slightly, "Can I?"

Dagna takes it over to her as she inspects it. Cullen looks over it as well, commenting. "It looks heavy."

"For now it is, I look forward to making improvements." Dagna replies as she motions for Izzie to sit in a nearby wooden chair.

Cullen helps Izzie take her coat off as Dagna holds the prosthesis out for her, carefully sliding the prosthetic over her arm, letting the buckles and straps dangle around her shoulder. Dagna motions to Cullen to take over helping her. Her excitement bubbling over. "Lemme grab my notepad and measuring tape. This is incredibly helpful, thank you!"

Cullen tightens the straps around Izzie's shoulder. He feels the weight of it as she slumps to her left. "Is it ok?" He says softly, as he leans in towards her ear.

"It  _ is  _ heavy, but I haven't used those muscles in a long time. Would certainly take some time to get used to." Izzie places her right hand across her shoulder on top of Cullen's hand, turning her head slightly to gently kiss his hand before Dagna comes back over. She makes some notes and tightens a few straps Cullen didn't pull tight enough. 

She stands back and admires her work. "Ok lift your arm for me. I need to see if it pinches anywhere or if it could use some work on it's range of movement."

Izzie lifts her arm slowly, her muscles trembling from the weight of it. Cullen helps her lift it and check her range of motion. As Izzie moves it around, Dagna takes notes. After a few rotations Izzie lowers her arm, looking at both arms resting on her thighs. Her heart feels heavy and a lump in her throat appears, as tears threaten to breach the corners of her eyes. Her soft sniffle prompts Cullen to circle around to face her. He gazes at her with concern as he sees her softly smile into her lap as tears fall. Dagna looks up from her notes and sees the mood shift. "Do- you want me to take it off Izzie?" She asks.

Izzie wipes her face with the end of her sleeve. "No, I'm good just give me a moment. "

Cullen looks to Dagna who nods and gives them a moment, closing her door behind her giving them some privacy. Cullen kneels at her level in front of her. "Talk to me, my love." His eyes pleading to help however he can.

She smiles through the tears. "I just- It's been so long since..." She chuckles heartily through a sob. "It's not even my real arm but- it almost  _ feels  _ like it could be."

Cullen takes her right hand kissing it gently, his thumb smooths over her knuckles as he speaks quietly and calmly. "I can push resources her way to speed this project of hers along if you'd like? If this- would make you feel-- whole."

Izzie nods and smiles through the tears. "I'd like that. - I don't want to take away from her work with the runes though. "

"I have the resources to hire her an assistant. I'll see to it that this is pushed forward." He cups her face in his hands as he stays kneeling in front of her. Wiping the tears from her eyes. 

"Thank you. I don't know why it's never occured to me to see if something like this existed. It-" Her voice breaks as she squeezes her eyes shut. Trying to keep a flood of tears back. "It feels heavy but- I like it." She feels Cullens hand on her cheek wiping her tears as he scoots forward. Pulling her forehead down to rest on his. She chuckles again through the tears. "If she does manage to make a sleeker and lighter one, I could finally stop getting weird looks when I buy a pair of gloves."

Cullen shakes his head and smiles. A tear of his own sliding down his cheek. Even through pain and uncertainty,  _ his Izzie, _ will find a way to put a positive spin on things. He pulls over another chair next to her. "Let's sit here a moment longer. When you're ready I'll grab Dagna. Then we can check on... _ Fredrick.  _ Levyn too. _ "  _ He pauses as he tilts her chin up. "I've booked two rooms in town at the Inn. One for you and Sam. I can't stay with you, as much as I wish I could-"

Izzie interrupts him as she shoots him a wicked grin, "It wouldn't bode well if they couldn't find their Commander."

Cullen shakes his head and smiles. Forcing the heat in his chest away. He clears his throat as she winks at him. "I'd like you here one more day to make sure the Prince is all right. In the morning I'll send Cassandra a telegram telling her she can send someone to pick you and Sam up." 

Her warm smile returns, as they sit there a few more minutes. Soaking up a few more- _ moments,  _ as Izzie gazes at the mechanical arm on her left...

.

The evening arrived quickly since they had awoken at noon. Abelas joined Cullen and Izzie as they visited the Prince, checking to make sure he could eat and drink again and the jaundice hadn't returned. The three stayed in the tower and continued the tour, checking in on Levyn as well. Cullen took them to the various floors housing the mages, the eventual libraries, a few empty rooms, save for some desks and chairs to hold classes on magical theory- someday. One particular floor had an impressive view overlooking the mountains and courtyard. Izzie and Abelas stood and gazed at the sun setting in the distance a few minutes, while another Lieutenant needed Cullen a moment. Izzie looked up at Abelas, arms crossed, squinting and scowling out the window. "Are you ok?"

He nods reluctantly as he focuses on- something off in the distance . "It was just bright out today, that's all."

"Do you need me to-?"He nods slightly as he turns to her. She smiles faintly. "Come here."

He bows his head as she places her hand gently on his scar. His eyes close as he feels her magic. She slowly drags her hand to his forehead, placing her thumb between his brows, easing the ache behind his eyes. "Thank you."

She smiles as he straightens his posture. "You're welcome. Don't hesitate to ask."

He grins slightly as he continues to look out the window. "I won't."

As she stands there a moment with Abelas, her eyes wander to a stone structure on the outskirts of the base. Large round door like the other one. She squints and cocks her head.  _ Another bunker. But why outside the base?  _ She looks up at Abelas again who whispers softly. "You see it too?"

"Yes. Thoughts?"

"Could be part of the previous structure. Could be caved in." He surrmisses. Casual curiosity in his tone.

Cullen comes back placing his hand on the small of her back, bending slightly to her. "Sorry about that. We can continue the tour."

Izzie smiles warmly at him as they make their way to the common areas, stopping in the commissary for dinner before grabbing their bags from the library. 

.

The sky was dark and the moon was high, as Cullen walked them to Lieutenant Barris standing at the front gate to take to the Inn. Barris nods and ushers them through as Izzie looks back at Cullen and smiles. His hand coming around his head to ease the tension of the day, returning her smile as he turns to retire for the night.

.

The Inn was cozy and warm. Old wooden beams and wood floors creaked beneath their feet as the lady at the counter gave them their keys. "Pass the fireplace and down the hall, there's stairs on your right, go up, then down the hall to your left."

Izzie thanks the woman as they walk to their rooms. At the stairs Abelas chimes in. "I liked the tour."

"Yeah?", Izzie says as they climb the stairs.

"Yes."

" Me too. I think  _ Fredrick  _ seems fine. I don't think there is more I can do for him."

"I agree, but I'm sure you don't mind getting to see Cullen one more time tomorrow before we leave." He smiles at her as they reach their doors.

Izzie smiles back as she faces him. "I feel a little more at peace, seeing him here. He's stressed no doubt, but I'm glad he's the one in charge of the Circle. I'd be nervous if it was anyone else."

He nods as he sets his bag down at his door, he leans against the frame in the empty hallway. His arms folded casually. "I agree. His men seem to hold him in high esteem as well." He pauses a moment contemplating. 

Izzie cocks her head waiting for him to continue. "What's wrong?"

"I might just be imagining it-but..."

"The stone structure with the big round door outside the compound."

"Yes...I felt- somewhat sick as I looked at it. As if there is something there but I can't place the feeling."

"Do- you still feel sick?"

He shakes his head."No, it could be nothing. Perhaps it was just my head." He smiles, easing her worry a little.

"We should get some sleep." She says as she yawns.

He nods politely,"Good night Izzie."

"Good night Abelas."

.

Her room at the Inn was lightly decorated. A painting of an open field by the window, a desk in the corner with a vase of faux Lilies. The bedspread was a mint green with pastel pink pillows. It didn't terribly clash, but it wasn't home. She changed and washed her face, staring at herself in the mirror a moment. She sighs as she lets her hair down and proceeds to crawl into bed. Her thoughts turn somber as she tries to sleep.  _ Why did Abelas feel sick earlier? Would Cullen tell her about the other bunker if she asked? It's not her business anyways. Perhaps it's just caved in ruins from long ago...She's lucky enough to know about the Circle and get a tour for Makers sake...  _ Her thoughts turn as she opens her eyes in the darkened room. Looking at the painting on the wall of the open field. Not as nice as the open field in the fade but-...  _ I hope he's not worried. I don't know how to explain what happened...I can't or shouldn't tell him about the Circle....Right?  _ She sighs heavily as she tosses and turns.  _ Someone was in need of healing. That's all. That's what I'll tell him.  _ She closed her eyes and switched sides, reaching for her other pillow and holding it to her chest. She breathes deep and starts to hum...

.

..

...

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Special thanks and shout out to Altoclefgirl for inspiring me to write my own story. Your continued help and support as my beta reader and friend means the world to me. Ma Serannas Falon <3
> 
> Intagram mistress_wolf_writesau  
> Tumblr mistress-wolf-writes-au


End file.
